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Is It Normal to Hurt Like This?

You’ve got your latch figured out, your baby isn’t biting, but still — hey, that hurts! It’s not something you’ve done wrong: A painful letdown reflex can sometimes be part of your breastfeeding journey.

But the good news is that as your amazing body adjusts to this new role, the letdown reflex should become painless. If not, something else may be wrong. Let’s look at what you should know.

Think of the letdown reflex as an intricate dance in which you and your baby are partners. Your body responds to input from your baby when they begin to feed or cry out in hunger. Sometimes even thinking about nursing them, touching your breasts, or using a pump can begin the process.

When your body gets the signal from your baby it triggers the nerves in your nipple and areola. These nerves send messages to the pituitary gland in your brain signaling it to release oxytocin and prolactin into your bloodstream.

So what do these hormones do? Prolactin signals the alveoli in your breast to remove the sugars and protein from your blood and produce more milk.

Oxytocin makes cells around the alveoli contract and push the milk into the milk duct. Oxytocin also widens the milk ducts so that the milk can flow more easily.

Your milk actually lets down several times during one feeding session, but you’ll probably only feel the first time. Some moms feel the letdown reflex seconds after their baby begins to suck. Some feel it only after a couple of minutes. And some don’t feel anything at all.

Like everything in our bodies, there isn’t an exact timetable or expectation to follow.

Here’s what you might notice:

• A tingling sensation sort of like pins-and-needles. And, yes, it can be disconcertingly intense and even painful. Some moms feel this only in the early days of breastfeeding and then the feeling fades. Others feel letdown during each feed throughout breastfeeding.
• A sudden fullness or warmth.
• Dripping from the other breast. Keep breast pads handy because letdown usually happens simultaneously in both breasts.
• An adjustment in your baby’s sucking rhythm as they change from short, quick sucks to longer paced-out sucks when the milk flows and they start to swallow.
• A sudden thirst. Researchers aren’t sure why this happens, but it may be due to the release of oxytocin.

There’s a lot going on in your body when letdown happens. Since we’re each unique in our experience of and response to pain, it’s not surprising that some people feel more discomfort than others.

Remember that it can take some time for your body to adjust to the new sensation. Over time, many breastfeeding parents notice less discomfort during letdown.

That said, there are several causes that can make letdown painful. Happily, there are also solutions.

Forceful letdown

If too much milk flows quickly out of your breast, it can cause pain during the release. Additionally, it can causes issues as your baby will struggle to swallow it all.

Try these tricks to slow down the flow:

• Use your hand or a breast pump to express some milk and capture the first letdown before you settle down to breastfeed.
• Work with gravity. Recline or lay on your back and put your baby on your chest to feed. Your milk flow will be slower with your baby sucking against gravity.
• Alternate breasts at each feeding.

Engorgement

Your body is hard at work learning to produce milk in the quantities your baby needs. Until it learns, you may find that supply exceeds demand. If your breasts are hard and swollen, the letdown reflex can be more painful.

If this is happening to you, consider:

• Expressing a small amount of milk to ease the tenderness. Using a warm compress or expressing milk in the shower can help soften the breasts.
• Applying cold cabbage leaves to your breasts between feeding sessions. Why? It may be that plant compounds in the cabbage have anti-inflammatory effects that can help reduce swelling. Favor green cabbage over purple so that you don’t stain your clothing.
• Feeding regularly. Skipping feeds can increase engorgement.

Clogged milk ducts

Milk that’s trapped in the breast and cannot get out will let you know that it’s there. You may feel pressure and a hard lump in your breast or underarm area where the milk is clogged or blocked.

If you suspect a blocked duct:

• Try to release the blockage with warm compresses, hot showers, and gentle massage.
• Increase your feedings and massage gently at the blockage while your baby is nursing. It works wonders.
• Experiment with different feeding positions to release the clog.
• Begin each feed on the affected breast.

Blebs

Sometimes, you’ll notice small white spots on your nipples at the end of a milk duct. These “milk blisters” or “blebs” are filled with hardened milk. Just as with clogged milk ducts, you can release the milk using with warm compresses and hot showers.

Mastitis

Noticed red streaks on your breast? Feel like you have flu and that you need some chicken soup? It may be mastitis, a breast infection. Sometimes a clogged duct or other issue can lead to an infection in the breast.

Don’t try to treat this on your own because a breast infection can require antibiotics. It’s important that you see your doctor or midwife for prompt treatment.

In the meantime, you can follow the suggestions above for a clogged duct to alleviate discomfort. Continue to breastfeed and rest as much as possible.

Sore nipples

Check that your baby is latching on correctly. If they aren’t your nipples will most likely become red, sore, and cracked. The discomfort from sore nipples can intensify during letdown.

If you’re struggling with sore nipples:

• Promote healing by dabbing some of your breast milk, lanolin, olive oil, or coconut oil onto your nipples after each feed.
• Experiment with different holds.
• Use cool compresses to reduce swelling.
• Seek assistance from a lactation consultant to improve your latch.

Thrush

This yeast infection is usually caused by a fungus called Candida albicans. It can make nipples appear red or shiny, or they may not look any different than normal. It can also make your nipples crack and hurt horribly.

If you feel burning, itching, or sharp shooting pains, you may have thrush. Since thrush spreads very easily, it’s most likely that your baby has thrush too. Peep into their mouth. A white, stubborn coating on the gums or the inside of your baby’s cheeks will confirm your suspicions. Keep in mind that it is normal to see a thin coating of milk on your baby’s tongue.

Turn to your medical practitioner for help as both you and your baby should be treated with antifungal medication.

Vasospasms

Vasospasms can happen in different parts of the body when the blood vessels tighten and go into spasm, preventing the blood from flowing normally. When this occurs in the nipple area, you’ll feel sharp pain or stinging in the nipple.

Vasospasms can happen from exposure to the cold or simply because your baby isn’t latching on correctly.

If you’re feeling vasospasms in the nipple:

• Try warming up your breasts using breast warmers or a gentle olive oil massage.
• Check to ensure you have a good latch. See a lactation consultant if needed.
• Talk to your medical practitioner about supplements or medications that may help.

Injury

Giving birth can strain all sorts of muscles, including the chest muscles that support your breasts. This injury can intensify pain felt during the letdown reflex.

Uterine contractions

We’re back to oxytocin. This multifunctional hormone also makes your uterus contract, especially in the first week or 10 days after birth. The good news is that this is a sign your uterus is returning to its normal size and place. The not-so-good news is that these contractions can get harder and last longer with each subsequent birth.

These contractions can become more painful during letdown. If you’re in pain due to uterine contractions:

• Use a heating pad to reduce discomfort.
• Consider taking acetaminophen (Tylenol) or ibuprofen (Advil).

The hours that you and your baby spend snuggling down to breastfeed are probably some of the most precious hours that you’ll spend together. Here’s what you can do to maximize your comfort.

Easing the letdown reflex

• If you take a warm shower or bath before you breastfeed, you’ll give your letdown reflex a head start. Don’t be surprised if your milk starts dripping before you get dry!
• Short on time? Press a warm, wet towel to your breasts or massage them gently.
• Relax. Sit or lie down and breathe out the stress. You deserve to enjoy this.
• Undress your baby and place them on your chest skin-to-skin with you.
• Cuddle your baby and breathe in that sweet baby smell.
• Condition yourself. Your body will learn to respond to cues that you associate with breastfeeding. Follow a set routine before you start: make a cup of tea, put on some soft music, and breathe deeply.

General tips

• It’s hard to time feedings, especially at first. But you can try to take acetaminophen or ibuprofen 30 minutes before feeding time to ease pains.
• Invest in comfortable nursing bras. They’re the tools of the trade and can help avoid pain and clogged ducts.
• Invest in a rocking chair or other comfortable spot to breastfeed.
• Work with a lactation consultant to solve persistent problems.
• Keep a bottle of water handy so you can stay well hydrated.

It’s not just you. At first, the letdown reflex can be a real pain in the breast. Hang in there because this pain should be temporary.

But don’t ignore symptoms or signs that the discomfort you’re feeling could be something more. And don’t forget to slip your breast pads into your bra or else you may find that the front of your shirt is suddenly wet.

what is it and how to overcome it?

A few years ago, the journal Science published a study revealing the biochemistry of disappointment. It turns out that it is accompanied by a complex and uncharacteristic for our brain double reaction. This discovery will help scientists find new drugs for depression, and we will understand that the state of disappointment is not as harmless as it seems at first glance.

In the article we talk about resources and possible dangers of disappointment, self-diagnosis techniques and exit strategies.

What is disappointment?

Disappointment is a negatively colored emotional state, which is manifested by dissatisfaction and a tendency to worry about unfulfilled dreams, aspirations or hopes, as well as the collapse of faith in something or someone. It occurs after a situation in which a person loses his “rose-colored glasses” and faces reality. It appears when a carefully planned or even idealized result turns out to be unattainable and at one moment all illusions collapse. We can say that disappointment is the other side of hope.

Uncharm is the logical, final stage of charm . If the first is accompanied by joyful euphoria, pleasure or an intoxicating state of consciousness, then the second is impossible without sadness, anger, emptiness. Disappointment is considered one of the most difficult emotional states, when a person experiences sadness, anger, resentment at the same time. How energy-consuming it can be is shown by the epithets for the word “disappointment”: hopeless, painful, unbearable, or even murderous.

A few facts that will help you better understand disappointment:

• This is one of the configurations of frustration - a state in which a person realizes the impossibility of achieving the desired and experiences anger, despair, anxiety about this.
• Depending on the strength of emotions, it has a wide scale of gradations from “ oh well ” to “ a complete bummer!”.
• If immersed in it for too long, it can become a quality of the personality.
• Looking disappointed means trying to be in charge. It is always a question of power and submission.
• This is not an innate, but a culturally learned egocentric emotion. It is often used as a reproach or justification for one's inaction. Less often - for decoration or attracting attention.
• It always contains the image of another "bad", therefore it divides, puts up barriers between people.
• A disappointed person loses hope and support in life. Therefore, this condition is physically associated with problems with the spine, a feeling of heaviness in the head and hands. If regret accumulates over the years, it literally does not allow you to breathe deeply and leads to problems with the lungs (tuberculosis, for example).

Take the depression test

What is the source of the state of disappointment?

But disappointment also has useful qualities. It helps to return to a state of balance when we:

• Get too deep in our expectations, illusions or fantasies about something or someone.
• We continue to live with children's magical thinking with faith in universal justice and universal love.
• Giving excess value to food, sex, money, material goods.
• We demand the impossible from ourselves and fight with all our might with a problem that we cannot solve.
• We are going not to our own, but to the goal imposed by stereotypes and other people's expectations.
• We get hung up on predictability, planning, control, trying to predict everything to the smallest detail.

Disappointment in people becomes dangerous when it goes into depreciation. Devaluation is the denial of any value of relationships, experiences, experiences. It anesthetizes, but kills spiritual growth and positive emotions. Disappointment without depreciation provides valuable experience, deepens and transforms relationships, strengthens self-confidence.

Five stages on the way from charm to maturity.

Psychologists say that a person feels disappointed for as long as it takes to reorient the psyche and consciousness. Moreover, such experience is an obligatory step on the way to maturity.

How the complete process of disappointment happens:

First stage: charm.

When a person is enchanted, he seems to fall under a spell: ideas, hobbies, another person, profession, new job. A very pleasant and necessary condition, but also very short-lived.

Second stage: disappointment.

This is the disenchantment process when illusions are broken. The main symptoms of the second stage: loss of hope, indignation, attempts to drown out the pain with bad habits (alcoholism, drug addiction), denial. At this stage, people either “break down” or analyze the causes of their condition. Sometimes they go to a psychotherapist for an answer.

Third stage: restoration.

Those who manage to pull themselves together and get out of a dangerous turn reach this stage. Recovery provides inspiration for creativity, releases strength for new relationships.

Fourth stage: maturity.

During this period a person is at the peak of his abilities. He becomes the Owner, not the Victim: he builds comfortable relationships with others, stops complaining, feels gratitude for any opportunities.

Fifth stage: satisfaction.

This is the satisfaction of having managed to pull myself together and enter a new stage of life. It is the pleasure of having an old problem solved and no longer disturbing. In general, people who have reached this stage become kinder. Perhaps it is from wisdom.

Such an interesting transformation. But in order to pass it, you have to work on yourself.

Take the depression test

How to overcome disappointment with minimal losses?

Unofficial statistics among psychotherapists show that disappointment in life is behind the majority of client requests. Of course, in most cases we are disappointed in love relationships. But not only. This condition is often associated with a career, loss of an old point of view, or getting rid of illusions. In some cases, it is experienced as a difficult moment, in others - as a long psychological process.

Waiting for it to “go away on its own” is useless. But you can use the ready-made strategy and move on.

1. Feel all painful emotions.

It is necessary to be aware of your emotional reaction, even if it is traumatic. If you do not admit it, disappointment will become more and more powerful over time and can lead to depression.

2. Give yourself time to mourn.

To get rid of negativity, you need to live it “to the very bottom”. Don't blame, scold yourself, or pretend like nothing's happening. It is better to set aside a day, a week (depending on the strength of emotions) for yourself and enjoy it to your heart's content.

3. Understand your expectations in a particular situation.

For example, disappointment in a person could come because of high standards - to him or to himself. Or because of too active idealization of a partner.

4. Give yourself time to recover.

Think about what would be the best solution for your situation? What lessons can you take from it? So it will be possible to understand that such a state is not the end, but only a period of life.

5 .Switch to resource activity.

It is more useful if it is creativity. Anything, as long as it gives energy and leaves joy. Additional forces will come in handy in order to return to your goals and move on.

Conclusions :

• Disappointment is an experience that comes after facing reality.
• It becomes a resource state in situations when you need to slow down, reconsider your outlook on life, get rid of illusions, acquire spiritual experience, accumulate potential, find harmony and peace.
• It's part of life. You'll just have to come to terms with it.

Take the self-esteem test

Disappointment - Psychologos

October 01, 2022, 9:45 pm

The film "The Sword in the Stone"

​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​Disappointment is an emotional state close to resentment, when you have to give up hope and the charm associated with hope.

Frustration is an egocentric and introverted emotion.

Disappointment is not an innate but a culturally learned emotion, most often used as a reproach or justification for one's own unwillingness to do something. For some people, the charm-disappointment dynamic is life's entertainment. It happens that disappointment is used as a decoration to attract attention ("disappointed young ladies").

What to do in order not to disappoint?

1. Do not associate with people who are prone to alternating charm and disappointment.
2. Do not charm (do not play for charm), if you are not ready to charm all your life.
3. Transfer relations to rational rails: negotiate, negotiate, warn. Behave more often in the position of an Adult.

Direction of development

Disappointment is not typical for adult people mentally, they don't play it. It makes no sense to be seriously fascinated by someone or something, entertaining unrealizable hopes. It is better to admire beautiful and delightful people, love them, take care of them, increase their priority within your life values.

• Emotional state

Comments (9):

olga, July 4, 2015, 05:46

How to deal with disappointment?

2

replies

Guest, June 1, 2017, 5:39 PM

Read the article even better!

1

reply

Guest, April 07, 2022, 13:59

Here, not only inattention is possible, but also the need for a daily set of exercises to cope with emotions. And depending on the severity of the problem, specialist supervision may be required.

Guest, April 07, 2022, 13:56

If you can't cope on your own, it's better to go to a specialist for at least one session for a consultation.

Guest, September 11, 2017, 1:37 pm

So those who are disappointed are just narrow-minded people?

1

reply

Guest, December 23, 2017, 4:18 pm

Rather, these are too high self-imagined standards, expectations from something or someone! Suppose all men are generous, but he counts a pretty penny, and what is the result? Disappointment! But is it anyone's fault that I am in my standard invented for all men! Or about men's prospects, I got married thinking you will earn a lot and hold high positions in the future, and you are disappointed again! Love the person, the objects that surround you, nature, the country, here and now as they are, and it will become easier to live and disappointment will never knock on your door!

1

reply

Guest, June 16, 2019, 10:44 pm

And if we are talking about a simple birthday. For example: "I want to celebrate my birthday with my family, but my husband does not agree and I have to celebrate in a different way." How to deal with this case? After all, there is a feeling of disappointment..... The question should be put something like this: why is the husband's opinion paramount for a woman, if we take the following quote "but the husband does not agree and you have to celebrate in a different way"?

Guest, May 01, 2020, 13:58

It is even surprising that an article with such a limited and primitive psychological view was published on a respected site.

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