How to prove emotional abuse of a child
What is emotional abuse? | The National Domestic Violence Hotline
“I don’t want you going out with them. I trust you; I just don’t trust them.”
“You know you can’t get anyone better than me. You are lucky to be with me.”
“Are you sure you want to eat that? I’m just attracted to someone who takes care of themselves.”
“You’re so dumb. I knew this would be over your head.”
Do any of these sentences sound familiar? If so, you might be in an emotionally abusive relationship.
Many people hear the word “abuse” and think of physical violence. Physical abuse is one type of abuse, but it is certainly not the only one.
According to The Hotline’s 2020 Data, 95% of contacts stated they were experiencing emotional abuse. Emotional abuse may not be what most people think about when they picture abuse, but that does not make it any less real or less serious. Because of its subtleties, emotional abuse can be quite difficult to detect when it is being experienced. Emotional abuse is also a foundation for other forms of abuse. Often, it is used erode a person’s self-esteem and self-worth and create a psychological dependency on the abusive partner. Let’s look at what emotional abuse is and how to know if emotional abuse is present in your relationship.
Emotional abuse includes non-physical behaviors that are meant to control, isolate, or frighten you. This may present in romantic relationships as threats, insults, constant monitoring, excessive jealousy, manipulation, humiliation, intimidation, dismissiveness, among others. Sometimes emotional abuse is more obvious, like a partner yelling at you or calling you names. Other times it can be more subtle, like your partner acting jealous of your friends or not wanting you to hang out with someone of another gender. While these emotionally abusive behaviors do not leave physical marks, they do hurt, disempower, and traumatize the partner who is experiencing the abuse.
Over time, emotional abuse can wear down a person’s self-worth, confidence, and their mental and emotional strength.
It’s difficult to feel sure of yourself when a partner is demeaning, dismissing, and second-guessing you constantly. Additionally, when you care about someone and have invested time in the relationship with them, you want to believe the best of them, and you may convince yourself that you were overreacting in how you interpreted their hurtful actions or words. An emotionally abusive partner may try to gaslight you by telling you outright that you are overreacting, being dramatic, being too emotional, or that you can’t take a joke.
For these reasons and more, it can be tough to detect emotional abuse and see it as a dangerous concern. Even then, survivors of emotional abuse are often hesitant to seek help or tell friends and family about their relationship concerns because they fear they will not be believed or taken seriously. Nonetheless, emotional abuse is serious, and it is not uncommon for emotional abuse to escalate to physical violence. In some relationships this escalation to physical abuse is slow, and in others it can happen rapidly.
So how do you know if you are in an emotionally abusive relationship?
- Here are some red flags:
-
- Your partner name calls you or demeans you.
- Your partner tries to control you, your time, and your actions.
- Your partner tells you what to do and what to wear.
- Your partner often makes you feel silly or dumb.
- Your partner questions your reality and says that things that you know happened didn’t happen. This is called gaslighting.
- Your partner is critical of your appearance.
- Your partner is jealous of time spent with your friends or family.
- Your partner punishes you by withholding attention or affection.
- Your partner doesn’t want you hanging out with someone of another gender.
- Your partner makes threats to hurt you or others to get what they want.
- Your partner wants you to ask for permission before doing something or spending time with other people.
- Your partner monitors where you go and stalks your whereabouts.
- Your partner doesn’t want you to work.
- Your partner embarrasses you in public.
- Your partner does not trust you and acts possessive.
- Your partner threatens breaking up or divorce to manipulate an argument.
- Your partner wants access to your phone, your passwords, or your social media.
- Your partner threatens suicide during arguments.
- Your partner is constantly accusing you of cheating.
- Your partner blames you for their unhealthy/abusive behaviors.
- Your partner makes you feel guilty or immature for not wanting to have sex.
- Your partner overloads you with compliments and gifts, and then uses that to manipulate you later (love bombing).
If any of these red flags feel familiar to you, know that you do not deserve to be treated that way and that you are not alone. It can be hard to decide what your next step should be, after learning that your relationship is not healthy. You might consider reaching out to a trusted friend or family member to talk about what you have been going through. You can also reach out to our Hotline advocates to talk about next steps and options available to you.
We are here 24/7 via phone, online chat, and text to provide you with education, support, and safety planning. The Hotline is completely free and confidential.
Answers shouldn’t be hard to find.
We're here to help!
Proving Emotional Abuse in Child Custody Case CA
Proving Emotional Abuse in Child Custody Case CA
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Should you have evidence of emotional abuse, it may impact your child custody case. Since the court always acts in favor of the child’s best interest, it will weigh the allegations seriously before making a decision. To increase the chances of negotiating a fair child custody agreement, retain the services of an experienced divorce lawyer. A seasoned family law attorney can assess the level of emotional abuse and determine your next course of action.
Emotional abuse defined
Emotional abuse is not always easy to detect. If you suspect that it may be occurring, you need professional guidance. Some of the most common examples of emotional abuse include:
- Verbally assaulting — A parent is guilty of verbal assault when they use cruel words to demean and subjugate their child. This type of behavior can have long-lasting psychological repercussions.
- Isolating & terrorizing — When a parent uses confinement or the threats of abuse to get what they what from a child, they are engaging in emotional abuse. If you witness your child being isolated or terrorized by their custodial parent, seek legal guidance.
- Ignoring and rejecting— Children have fragile egos and are extremely impressionable. A parent can easily abuse their power and manipulate a child’s will by ignoring and/ or rejecting them.
- Neglecting — Children need love and constant care. If a parent fails to provide these necessities, they may be guilty of neglect.
- Exploiting — Any parent who uses their children to further their own interests should not have custody.
Identifying emotional abuse can be challenging. In many cases, instances of abuse are subtle or under the radar. However, emotional abuse is extremely harmful to developing children and it is vital that you get help if you think your child may be a victim.
Proving emotional abuse
Unless you have concrete evidence — video, audio, photographs, etc. – proving emotional abuse can be difficult. Without evidence it ultimately comes down to a he said/she said situation. However, the best way to try and prove emotional abuse is to ask for a mental health study (MHS) or forensic evaluation during the custody proceedings. A mental health expert can interact with your child and quickly discern if there is any level of emotional abuse.
Contact compassionate California family law attorneys
Giuliano Law Firm has provided sensitive and effective legal care to families throughout California for more than 20 years. No matter how difficult your domestic law issue may seem, our experienced attorneys are up for the task. To find out more about our services, or to discuss your case with a knowledgeable family law attorney, call (831) 257-8692 or contact us online.
Speak With An Experienced Child Custody Attorney
Call 831.372.4003 or fill out the form below to speak with an attorney.
Categories
Psychological child abuse | State Institution "Lyakhovichi Territorial Center for Social Services to the Population"
People express negative emotions in relation to others in different ways. Someone simply speaks badly about some person behind his back, and someone chooses a harsher and more unpleasant method of influence - psychological violence. Statistics show that the victim most often is not an adult, but a child. Minors are subjected to psychological violence in schools, on the street, at home. This is a very serious problem, because because of it, children's emotional behavior and development are disturbed. They have fears.
What is psychological abuse?
Psychological violence is also called emotional. This term refers to the periodic or constant insult of the child with some unpleasant words, the humiliation of his human dignity, the utterance of threats. Often, parents have formed the desired image of children. To achieve it, mothers and fathers present their children with such requirements that they are not able to fulfill due to age opportunities. This also applies to psychological abuse.
Negative attitude towards a child has very serious consequences. He ceases to be happy. He begins to suffer from his own feelings. The child withdraws into himself, loses confidence in the people around him. In the future, all this leads to problems in building relationships. Another negative consequence is low self-esteem. For example, peers at school may call a child scary, stupid. With such thoughts about himself, he grows in the future.
Problem classification into forms
What can be considered psychological abuse of a child? Experts identify several forms of this problem. Here are the main ones:
- Degradation. With this form, children or adults influence a particular child with rude words, curses, name-calling, ridicule in front of other people.
- Ignore. This form of violence is most often observed on the part of adults - parents. They do not pay attention to their child, they are not interested in his successes and achievements. He does not feel affection, care, love. Naturally, such an attitude depresses the child.
- Repulsion. This feature of behavior is manifested by the fact that parents push their child away, constantly drive him away, that is, they make it clear that they do not need him.
- Terrorization. In this form of abuse, the child is constantly threatened by something. They threaten him, make demands that are impossible at this age stage.
In various books on education, articles on psychological abuse of children, special attention is paid to isolation. This is another form of the problem. Its essence lies in various prohibitions (for example, you can’t communicate with peers, go for a walk with them). Sometimes, during isolation, parents resort to additional physical violence - they lock the child alone in an apartment, room, and sometimes even in a closet, beat him if he violates the prohibitions.
Signs of psychological abuse
When a child becomes a victim of psychological abuse, this can be guessed from certain behavioral patterns. The following signs are observed:
the child develops anxiety, excessive anxiety;
appetite is disturbed;
feeling depressed;
self-esteem decreases;
minor avoids peers, adults,
seeks to retire; sometimes, due to psychological abuse, a child develops such a character trait as aggressiveness;
sleep is disturbed due to negative emotions;
the child begins to pay less attention to studies, gets poor grades at school;
constant threats, insults, bullying by peers or adults lead to suicide attempts.
As early as childhood, psychological abuse causes health problems. Physical and mental development is delayed, enuresis, nervous tics, and obesity occur. Emotional abuse affects the brain. This ultimately causes a predisposition to various diseases:
coronary heart disease;
chronic fatigue syndrome;
oncological diseases, etc.
Domestic violence and advice to parents
Psychological violence in the family against a child occurs for various reasons.
First, parents may simply not love their child. It's terrifying. This reason simply does not fit in the head. How can you not love your own child, because he is the future of parents. Abusive moms and dads need to be talked to. Relatives also need help. If the parents do not come to their senses, then it is best for the child to live, for example, with his grandmother.
Another common reason is demands on the child. It is important to remember that you cannot force another person to do something. Requirements that are impossible to fulfill or that the child does not like can suppress the will and cause a depressed state.
Commandments of wise parents
There are 4 commandments of wise parents. They can help avoid psychological abuse of a child, because mothers and fathers do not always realize that their upbringing is wrong and leads to negative consequences.
First, never try to make the best out of your child. Not all people are the same. Each person is endowed with certain abilities and capabilities.
Secondly, do not compare your child with other children, do not reproach him for not achieving something, like some of his classmates.
Thirdly, do not threaten the child, do not blackmail him. Otherwise, you will cause him only fear, shame. Your child may think that you just do not love him.
Fourth, do not sort things out with a child in front of witnesses, even if he has done something. It is better to discuss the problem at home, find out the reason. When misbehaving, shame the child, but remember that there should be a measure in everything.
A problem at school Absolutely any child can become a victim of school bullying. The likelihood of this is greatly increased if he is calm, not too active and sociable. His offenders can be class leaders, aggressive children who have found a victim for self-affirmation or who always strive to be in the spotlight.
A child will always tell about psychological abuse if he trusts his parents. With a secretive nature, lack of trust in the family, the opposite situation is observed. The child does not share his experiences and problems with anyone. It is possible to guess that he became a victim of psychological violence at school. The presence of this problem is indicated by the following nuances:
the child does not want to go to school;
he doesn't talk about his classmates;
his things are sometimes torn or soiled;
The child returns home after school in a depressed state.
What to do if a child is abused during school
Psychological abuse of children at school is a problem that should be solved by parents together with the class teacher. The teacher, as a rule, is aware of everything that happens in the classroom. You can also talk to the mothers and fathers of the offenders. If a minor has been a victim of abuse for a long time, then the best way out is to change schools or temporarily transfer to home schooling.
If a child does not want to transfer to another school, then parents should give him some advice on how to deal with ridicule, insults:
who does this;
an effective way to deal with offenders is to show them that their unpleasant words do not hurt or upset at all;
in response to the insults of the offenders, you can simply laugh (if you demonstrate such behavior every time, then after a while, peers will simply become uninteresting in “poisoning” their victim).
Liability for child abuse in the Republic of Belarus
The legislation of the Republic of Belarus establishes several types of liability for persons who abuse a child.
Administrative responsibility. The Code of Administrative Offenses of the Republic of Belarus provides for liability for failure to perform or improper performance of duties for the maintenance, upbringing, education, protection of the rights and interests of minors - in the form of a warning or the imposition of an administrative fine.
Criminal liability. Belarusian criminal legislation provides for liability for all types of physical and sexual abuse of children, as well as for a number of articles - for mental abuse and for neglecting the basic needs of children, lack of care for them.
Civil liability. Abuse of a child may serve as a basis for bringing parents (persons replacing them) to liability in accordance with family law.
Child abuse
Child abuse- Healthcare issues »
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- Child abuse
WHO/S. Becker
© A photo
\n
Magnitude of the problem
\n
\nChild maltreatment is a global problem with serious life-long consequences. Although studies have recently been carried out in some low- and middle-income countries, much data is still lacking.
\n
\nChild maltreatment is a complex and difficult issue to study. Available estimates vary widely depending on the country and the research method used. Grades depend on the following aspects:
\n
- \n
- applicable definitions of child abuse;\t \n
- type of child abuse being studied; \n
- coverage and quality of official statistics; \n
- coverage and quality of surveys that require reports from victims themselves, parents or caregivers. \n
\n
\nHowever, international studies show that one quarter of all adults were physically abused as children, and that 1 in 5 women and 1 in 13 men were sexually abused as children. In addition, many children are victims of emotional (psychological) abuse and neglect.
\n
\nAn estimated 41,000 murders of children under the age of 15 occur each year. This figure underestimates the true extent of the problem, as a significant proportion of child abuse deaths are incorrectly attributed to falls, burns, drowning, and other causes.
\n
\nIn armed conflict and refugee camps, girls are particularly vulnerable to sexual violence, exploitation and abuse by the military, security forces, other members of their communities, humanitarian workers and others.
\n
Consequences of child abuse
\n
\n Child abuse causes suffering to children and families and can have long-term consequences. Abuse leads to stress, which is associated with impaired early brain development. Extreme stress can disrupt the development of the nervous and immune systems. As a result, in adulthood, people who were abused as children are at increased risk of behavioral and physical and mental health problems, such as:
\n
- \n
- committing or being a victim of violence;\t \n
- depression; \n
- smoking; \n
- obesity;\n \n
- high risk sexual behavior; \n
- unplanned pregnancy; \n
- Harmful use of alcohol and drugs. \n
\n
\nAs a result of these behavioral and mental health consequences, abuse can lead to heart disease, cancer, suicide, and sexually transmitted infections.
\n
\nIn addition to the health and societal impacts, child maltreatment also has economic impacts, including hospitalization costs, mental health care, child care, and long-term health costs.
\n
Risk factors
\n
\nIdentified risk factors for child abuse. These risk factors are not present in all social and cultural settings, but they give a general idea when trying to understand the causes of child abuse.
\n
Child
\n
\nIt is important to emphasize that children are victims and should never be blamed for abuse. Certain personality traits in a child may increase the likelihood of abuse:
\n
- \n
- a child under 4 years of age or a teenager;\n \n
- an unwanted or misbehaving child; \n
- a child who has special needs, who cries constantly, or who has abnormal physical features. \n
\n
Parents or caregivers
\n
\nSome characteristics of parents or caregivers may increase the risk of child abuse. Among them are the following:
\n
- \n
- difficulties associated with the newborn;\n \n
- leaving the child without attention; \n
- childhood abuse; \n
- lack of knowledge about child development or unrealistic expectations; \n
- harmful use of alcohol or drugs, including during pregnancy; \n
- involvement in criminal activity; \n
- experiencing financial difficulties. \n \n
\n
Relationships
\n
\nA number of factors in relationships within families or between sexual partners, friends, and peers can increase the risk of child abuse, such as :
\n
- \n
- problems in the field of physical or mental health or development of any family member;\n \n
- discord in the family or violence between other family members; \n
- isolation in the community or lack of a supportive circle; \n
- lack of support in raising a child from other family members. \n
\n
Community and social factors
\n
\nA number of characteristics of individual communities and communities can increase the risk of child abuse. They include:
\n
- \n
- gender and social inequality; \n
- lack of adequate housing or family support services and institutions; \n
- high rates of unemployment and poverty; \n
- easy access to alcohol and drugs; \n
- inappropriate policies and programs to prevent child abuse, child pornography, child prostitution, and child labor;\n \n
- social and cultural norms that support or glorify violence against others, favor the use of corporal punishment, require strong gender roles or belittling the status of the child in the relationship between parents and children; \n
- social, economic, health, and educational policies that lead to poor living standards or socioeconomic inequality or instability. \n
\n
Prevention
\n
\nPrevention of child abuse requires a multisectoral approach. Effective programs are those that support parents and instill positive parenting skills. They include:
\n
- \n
- Nursing home visits to parents and children for support, education, and information;\n \n
- Parent education, usually in groups, to improve child-rearing skills, increase knowledge of child development, and encourage positive treatment strategies with kids; and \n
- multi-component activities, typically including parent support and education, early childhood education, and child care. \n
\n
\nOther prevention programs are also promising in some respects.
\n
- \n
- Abuse head injury prevention programs (also called shaken baby syndrome and traumatic brain injury). These are usually hospital-level programs targeting young parents prior to their discharge, educating them about the dangers of shaken baby syndrome and recommending interventions for inconsolably crying babies. \n
- Child sexual abuse prevention programs. They are usually held in schools and teach children about the following areas: \n
- ownership of one's body;\t \n
- the difference between good and bad touch; \n
- how to recognize threatening situations; \n
- how to say \"no\"; \n
- how to tell a trusted adult about abuse. \n
- \n
\n
\nSuch programs are effective in increasing protective factors against child sexual abuse (for example, knowledge about sexual abuse and protective behaviors), but data on whether such programs reduce others types of violence are absent.
\n
\nThe earlier in a child's life such activities are carried out, the more beneficial they are for the child (eg, cognitive development, behavioral and social competence, educational training) and for society (eg, reduced delinquency and crime).
\n
\nIn addition, early recognition of cases, combined with ongoing care for child victims of abuse and their families, can help reduce re-abuse and its consequences.
\n
\nFor maximum impact, prevention and care interventions are recommended by WHO as part of a four-pronged public health approach:
\n
- \n
- identifying the problem;\n \n
- identifying causes and risk factors; \n
- development and testing of measures aimed at minimizing risk factors; \n
- disseminate information on the effectiveness of interventions and scale up proven effective interventions.\n \n
\n
WHO activities
\n
\nWHO in collaboration with a number of partners in the following areas:
\n
- \n
- provides technical and normative guidance on evidence-based child abuse prevention;\n \n
- calls for greater international support for and investment in evidence-based child abuse prevention region; \n
- provides technical support for evidence-based child abuse prevention programs in select low- and middle-income countries. \n
","datePublished":"2022-09-19T19:00:00.0000000+00:00","image":"https://cdn.who.int/media/images/default-source/ imported/children-running-jpg.jpg?sfvrsn=50512cc9_2","publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"World Health Organization: WHO","logo":{"@type" :"ImageObject","url":"https://www.who.int/Images/SchemaOrg/schemaOrgLogo.jpg","width":250,"height":60}},"dateModified":"2022- 09-19T19:00:00.0000000+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":"https://www.who.int/ru/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/child-maltreatment","@context": "http://schema.org","@type":"Article"};
Key facts
- One in 5 women and 1 in 13 men report being sexually abused as children.
- The consequences of child maltreatment include lifelong physical and mental health damage, and its social and professional consequences can ultimately slow down the economic and social development of a country.
- Child maltreatment is preventable—a multisectoral approach is needed.
- Effective prevention programs can support parents and teach them positive parenting skills.
- Continued care for children and families can help reduce the risk of re-abuse and minimize its consequences.
Child abuse is the mistreatment and neglect of children under the age of 18. It covers all types of physical and/or emotional abuse, sexual abuse, neglect, neglect and commercial or other exploitation that results in actual or potential harm to the health, survival, development or dignity of the child in the context of a relationship of responsibility, trust or power. . Intimate partner violence is also sometimes considered a form of child abuse.
Magnitude of the problem
Child abuse is a global problem with serious lifelong consequences. Although studies have recently been carried out in some low- and middle-income countries, much data is still lacking.
Child abuse is a complex and difficult issue to study. Available estimates vary widely depending on the country and the research method used. Grades depend on the following aspects:
- applicable definitions of child abuse;
- type of child abuse being studied;
- statistical coverage and quality of official statistics;
- coverage and quality of surveys that require reports from victims themselves, parents or caregivers.
However, international studies show that one quarter of all adults were physically abused as children, and that 1 in 5 women and 1 in 13 men were sexually abused as children. In addition, many children are victims of emotional (psychological) abuse and neglect.
An estimated 41,000 murders of children under the age of 15 occur each year. This figure underestimates the true extent of the problem, as a significant proportion of child abuse deaths are incorrectly attributed to falls, burns, drowning, and other causes.
In armed conflict and refugee camps, girls are particularly vulnerable to sexual violence, exploitation and abuse by the military, security forces, other members of their communities, humanitarian workers and others.
Consequences of abuse
Child abuse causes suffering to children and families and can have long-term consequences. Abuse leads to stress, which is associated with impaired early brain development. Extreme stress can disrupt the development of the nervous and immune systems. As a result, in adulthood, people who were abused as children are at increased risk of behavioral and physical and mental health problems, such as:
- committing violence or becoming a victim of violence;
- depression;
- smoking;
- obesity;
- high risk sexual behavior;
- unplanned pregnancy;
- harmful use of alcohol and drugs.
As a result of these behavioral and mental health consequences, abuse can lead to heart disease, cancer, suicide, and sexually transmitted infections.
In addition to health and societal impacts, child maltreatment also has economic impacts, including the cost of hospitalization, mental health treatment, child care, and long-term health costs.
Risk factors
Risk factors for child abuse have been identified. These risk factors are not present in all social and cultural settings, but they give a general idea when trying to understand the causes of child abuse.
Child
It is important to emphasize that children are victims and should never be blamed for abuse. Certain individual characteristics of a child may increase the likelihood of abuse:
- child under 4 years of age or adolescent;
- an unwanted child or a child that does not live up to the expectations of the parents;
- a child with special needs, constant crying or abnormal physical features.
Parents or caregivers
Certain characteristics of parents or caregivers may increase the risk of child abuse. Among them are the following:
- difficulties associated with the newborn;
- leaving a child unattended;
- childhood abuse;
- lack of knowledge about child development or unrealistic expectations;
- harmful use of alcohol or drugs, including during pregnancy;
- involvement in criminal activity;
- experiencing financial difficulties.
Relationships
A number of factors in family relationships or between sexual partners, friends and peers can increase the risk of child abuse, for example:
- a family member's physical or mental health or developmental problems;
- discord in the family or violence between other family members;
- isolation in the community or lack of a support circle;
- lack of support in raising a child from other family members.
Community and social factors
A number of characteristics of individual communities and communities can increase the risk of child abuse. They include:
- gender and social inequality;
- Lack of adequate housing or family support services and institutions;
- high levels of unemployment and poverty;
- easy access to alcohol and drugs;
- inadequate policies and programs to prevent child abuse, child pornography, child prostitution and child labor;
- social and cultural norms that support or glorify violence against others, favor the use of corporal punishment, require rigid gender roles, or degrade the status of the child in parent-child relationships;
- social, economic, health and educational policies that lead to poor living standards or socioeconomic inequality or instability.
Prophylaxis
A multisectoral approach is needed to prevent child maltreatment. Effective programs are those that support parents and instill positive parenting skills. These include:
- Nursing home visits to parents and children for support, education and information;
- Parent education, usually in groups, to improve child-rearing skills, increase knowledge of child development, and encourage strategies for dealing positively with children; and
- multi-component activities, usually including parent support and education, early childhood education and childcare.
Other prevention programs are also promising in some respects.
- Abuse head injury prevention programs (also called shaken baby syndrome and traumatic brain injury). These are usually hospital-level programs targeting young parents prior to their discharge, educating them about the dangers of shaken baby syndrome and recommending interventions for inconsolably crying babies.
- Child sexual abuse prevention programs. They are usually held in schools and educate children in the following areas:
- ownership of one's body;
- difference between good and bad touches;
- how to recognize threatening situations;
- how to say "no";
- how to talk about abuse to a trustworthy adult.
Such programs are effective in increasing protective factors against child sexual abuse (eg, knowledge about sexual abuse and protective behaviours), but there is no data on whether such programs reduce other types of violence.
The earlier in a child's life such interventions are, the more beneficial they are for the child (eg cognitive development, behavioral and social competence, educational training) and society (eg reduction in delinquency and crime).
In addition, early recognition of cases, combined with continued care for child victims of violence and families, can help reduce re-abuse and its consequences.
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