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IUGR—Why Is My Baby Small and What Can Be Done About It?

What is IUGR?

IUGR stands for intrauterine growth retardation. This means that your baby is growing slowly and doesn't weigh as much as your doctor expected for this stage of pregnancy. If your unborn baby weighs less than most babies at this stage, your baby might have IUGR. IUGR is also used to describe a baby who weighs less at birth than most babies at the same stage. For babies who are born near their due date (meaning, they aren't premature), the dangerous weight is anything less than 5 pounds, 8 ounces.

Your doctor might suspect IUGR if he or she thinks your baby is growing slightly less than would be expected. IUGR is usually diagnosed during an ultrasound examination. Doctors most often find it during the 6th, the 7th or the 8th months of pregnancy.

It's important to know that IUGR only means slowed growing. These small babies aren't mentally slow or retarded. Most small babies grow up to be healthy children and adults.

Why is my baby small?

Doctors know many of the causes of IUGR but are only able to be sure about the cause in about one half of babies who have IUGR. The most common reasons for a baby to be small are the following:

• The mother smoked cigarettes during pregnancy.

• The mother drank alcohol during pregnancy.

• The mother had high blood pressure during pregnancy.

• The mother had infections during pregnancy.

• The baby has chromosomal abnormalities (like Down syndrome).

• The mother used certain medicines during pregnancy.

• The mother is small (less than 5 feet tall or weighing less than 110 pounds).

Why is my baby's size important?

The best predictor of a baby's survival and good health is its birth weight. Babies born with low birth weight might have problems near the time of birth. Because of the danger of some of these problems—such as difficulty holding a normal body temperature or fighting infection—your doctor will do some tests to find out if your baby is growing well, both before and after birth.

What tests might be done on my baby?

Two tests can find out if your baby has IUGR and keep track of your baby's growth in the womb. These tests are the ultrasound exam and the nonstress test. The first kind of test, the ultrasound exam, is used to find out if your baby has IUGR. This exam is done every three to four weeks to make sure your baby is still growing right. The ultrasound exams let your doctor look at your baby's internal organs and measure the amount of fluid around the baby.

Special ultrasound exams are called biophysical profiles. During a biophysical profile, the person who does the exam will also watch your baby's breathing, muscle tone and movements.

The other test is the nonstress test. This test is usually done in the doctor's office, but it might be done in a hospital. A nonstress test measures how fast your baby's heart is beating. A healthy baby normally has a heartbeat that gets faster as the baby moves around. A nonstress test takes about 20 to 30 minutes to do. It might take longer if your baby is asleep.

Sometimes your doctor wants to watch your baby's heartbeat while your uterus contracts (squeezes together). This is called a contraction stress test. There are two ways to help you have contractions for just a little while. First, your nipples will be warmed up. Sometimes this makes your uterus start contracting for a little while. If that doesn't work, you could take a special medicine (either oxytocin or pitocin), to make your uterus contract just for a little while.

What happens if a test isn't normal?

If one of the tests isn't normal, your doctor may want to do other tests. Your doctor may also try to start your labor early (induce labor) if you might have a problem.

What will the doctor do to help my baby?

If your baby is very small when it's born, your doctor can give it oxygen through a nose tube, fluids through a tube in a vein and, sometimes, antibiotics.

What can I do to help my baby?

You can do five important things to help your baby grow big enough before it's born:

1. If you smoke—quit now. Cigarettes hurt the placenta, which is your baby's only way to get “food.” It's never too late to quit smoking. Babies gain one half of their weight in the last three months before being born.

2. If you drink alcohol—quit now. Even one drink a day makes it more likely that you will have a small baby. You could even have a baby with brain damage caused by the alcohol. This can happen in all months of pregnancy.

3. If you use illegal drugs—quit now. Almost all illegal drugs make babies too small to be strong and healthy. You may need your doctor's help to quit so you don't have withdrawal problems.

4. Eat a good diet. Ask your doctor to tell you the best foods to eat.

5. Keep all your appointments for doctor visits and tests.

interpretation of dreams about a boy's child

The appearance in a dream of some people is a fairly common phenomenon. Most often, we dream of familiar persons - this means that we think quite a lot about one of them, or maybe we feel guilty in front of them. But sometimes unfamiliar images penetrate our dreams. For example, you can see in a dream a child, a boy, playing in a room or running in a meadow, crying or laughing. If you want to know why a child, a boy, is dreaming and what changes in life such a dream portends, it is on his circumstances, as well as on the personality of the baby himself, that you need to pay attention. It is they who will be important for understanding the sign that the subconscious or fate wants to give you. nine0003

By the way, most interpreters agree that a boy, a child who appeared in the vastness of your dream, is rather a good prediction, a good sign, a harbinger of success and good changes.

Why do women and girls dream of a child boy?

Female dreamers most often turn to dream books in search of an answer about why a boy child appeared to them in a dream, what can this mean? Firstly, through such a dream, the subconscious mind can contact a woman: if an unmarried lady saw a newborn baby boy crying in a stroller, this speaks of her dreams of getting married, which she may even hide from herself or push back to the future, believing that the time has not yet come. But such a dream says that the subconscious desire is too strong and a conflict of internal and external urges has already arisen. So maybe it's time to look around for the right partner. nine0003

A girl should be careful if in a dream she is looking for a lost boy's child. This dream warns of impending troubles, and the girl will fall into them because of her frivolity or gullibility. In this case, the dream suggests that you should be more thoughtful about the decisions you make and not trust those who push you on adventures that are unusual for your character.

Child boy in Longo's dream book

The interpreter considers a dream about a child boy a harbinger of great wealth, which will imperceptibly fall on you and seriously please you with this. A smart and handsome boy dreams of a happy and long life. But if the child cries in your dream and cannot calm down, then you should urgently devote time to your business, trying not to miss anything important. Neglect of this advice of the universe can lead to large monetary losses. Not a very good sign and the appearance in your dream of a bully boy who rushes into a fight. Your subconscious, in the form of a bully, displays your inner self, showing that problems and conflicts can await you. Moreover, those individuals whom you consider close friends may be to blame for them. nine0003

Child boy in Miller's dream book

The interpreter pays special attention to the behavior of the child, the boy in your dream. According to the author of the dream book, the interpretations here are quite straightforward. In particular, if in a dream a child was crying, then in reality some troubles, losses, illness or sad news await you. If, on the contrary, the guest of your dream laughed and rejoiced, you are promised strong feelings, love, new emotions. For writers, actors, poets, designers and representatives of other creative professions, a dream about a child boy promises a quick visit from the muse. It’s good if the child the boy you dreamed about is sweet and beautiful - in this case, wealth and happiness await you. If the baby gave you something in a dream, this is a sure sign that financial well-being and money will simply fall on you from the ceiling. nine0003

Dreams about a boy child are of particular importance for girls. For the fair sex, such dreams hint that it is time to take care of your own reputation, take a closer look at your surroundings and appreciate the people she trusts. An unmarried beauty who saw herself in a dream with a child in her arms should be afraid of not very kind people in reality - most likely, she will be betrayed by someone close to her. The death of her own baby for a woman in a dream means only that she is afraid of something in reality, not sure about her future. But if the dream was about an unfamiliar child, whom you nevertheless called your son, be careful in relationships - a loved one can betray you. nine0003

A boy child in Tsvetkov's dream book

For people who dreamed of a boy child, the interpreter recommends paying attention to how they interacted with the baby in a dream. Auspicious is the vision in which you played with the child who appeared to you behind closed eyes. Such a dream is a harbinger of a good period in life, a successful stage, which will be quite long. You will be lucky in love, in career, and in money matters.

Child boy in Vanga's dream book

Interpreters warn that an unfamiliar boy in a dream that you met on the road is evidence of self-doubt, worries about your future. You think too much about tomorrow, you don’t know what to expect from it, perhaps such doubts and throwing prevent you from living and developing normally, and this dream may push you to decide to consult a psychologist. Do not be shy about this, because in this case, the subconscious is not in vain trying to draw your attention to the problem, its solution will allow you to achieve much greater heights. nine0003

It is not the best sign to dream of a completely naked baby, a boy's child. This suggests that a difficult financial situation awaits you, and little will depend on you. Try to be more attentive to money, avoid possible waste and adventures. If you receive a tasty financial offer, it is better to refuse - everything is not as rosy as it seems now.

A dream warns of failures in which you hold a baby with dirty hands. But if the baby smiles, sleeps soundly in your arms, shows signs of sympathy - expect success and know that you will succeed in what you have in mind. nine0003

Psychologist's comment

Maria Khomyakova, psychologist, art therapist, fairy tale therapist:

This image has many facets. A child at the mother's breast symbolizes the beginning of a new life, accomplishments. A boy can act as an image of a divine child who has tremendous potential for change and who personifies the unity of opposites. The symbol of the integrity of humanity and creativity is also about the image of a boy in a dream.

It is also possible that through such a dream your inner child calls out to you, for whom it is important to inform about his desires and needs. To hear him, to see your potential, try to remember in detail what the dreaming boy did, what he was talking about, for what purpose did he come?

My child annoys me: what to do

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YULIA STAROVOYT,

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First of all, stop panicking. According to anonymous surveys, every woman at least once in her life caught herself thinking about this.

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Maternal instinct controls only those functions that are responsible for the survival of the baby. We will do everything possible so that nothing threatens the life and health of our child, no matter what it costs us. But since we are rational and social beings, concern for the survival of offspring alone is not enough. We demand so much more from ourselves – to always love and be in emotional contact. nine0003

But love is not issued with a birth certificate: it is honed and grows with the child and you as parents. Few of us have been taught to cope with the difficulties of parenting.

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Let's see how we can help ourselves.

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Feeling of guilt

From the point of view of biology, irritation is a signal that you need to pay attention to your condition, switch to yourself. First of all, it is worth removing the feeling of guilt, if any, and admitting: yes, I am annoyed. You are a living person - not a robot and not an ideal image from books on child psychology. Perhaps you are too immersed in a child or life. But now you need yourself first of all, not the child. nine0003

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Rhythmize joint activities with your child. Give him full attention for a while, and then switch to your own business by offering him something that he can do on his own in a safe environment. Of course, the baby needs to be monitored, but if he is busy and in your field of vision, you can do something for yourself. Try to create such a rhythm, and you will see that, having been nourished by contact with you, the child can study on his own for some time, and with age this time becomes longer. You only need to maintain this rhythm and be sincerely included in the moments when you are doing something together. nine0003

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Physical fatigue

Motherhood is a round-the-clock and difficult job in which it is vital to organize a balance of work and rest. Assess how satisfied your physical needs are. Good food, sleep, walking alone, pleasant sports, massages are not whims, but a necessity.

May need to see a doctor or be tested for deficiencies. Yes, sometimes it is difficult to find the time and energy to take care of yourself among the cares of the child and the maintenance of life, but this is what will give you the resource that is not enough. nine0003

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Don't be afraid to ask others for help: do something for you or babysit. The kid, if he is already ready to let you go, is also useful to be with other confidants. And it is important for an older child to learn the physical care of their needs by your example.

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Every day, for example before going to bed or after waking up, take a look at your body. What does he lack? What is too much? Ask yourself: how can I take care of myself and how do I organize it? nine0003

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Emotional burnout

A parent needs to constantly deal with emotions - his own and his child's. Breakthrough of feelings every day. Sometimes this can make you feel like you had to work with a jackhammer at a construction site all day. In a sense, it is.

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At the same time, the life of a parent can be very meager, similar to Groundhog Day. Think about how you can diversify it: get more pleasant emotions? Try something new? nine0003

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Great burnout prevention is communication. Do not be silent about your difficulties: share emotions with friends, look for communities of moms with children your age and older to share experiences and just have a good time together. Consciously seek understanding, laugh at the difficulties experienced. There's a mom around here right now that's experiencing the same thing.

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Pour out your feelings on paper or a trusted person. When the primary tension has passed, try to look for something funny in these situations. Repeat your dialogue with your child in a drawl or in a ridiculous accent. Transfer the experienced episode to a comical setting. Ask yourself what your favorite comedian would do if you were in your position. Look for inspiration in public memes about motherhood - sometimes it's just saving. nine0003

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Control instead of relationships

The child's psyche is still immature in all respects. He does not have the same speed of thought, level of awareness and ability to plan as you do. Therefore, most likely, every day something does not go according to your plan. The personality of the child also does not develop in everything as you imagined before his birth.

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Assess your expectations and check them against reality. Too rigid settings interfere with enjoying relationships with a child. Parenting is a true resilience training. Take a deep breath and let go of unnecessary expectations. After all, he is just a child and he follows his own path. nine0003

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Write your list of expectations from the child: “I want him to neatly fold his things”, “I want him to get into a good university”, “I want him to pack faster”. Now add the opposite to each of the points: “But he has the right to put them together the way he wants”, “But he has the right to choose a profession to his liking”, “But he can become more independent if he gathers himself.” Stay with these thoughts - it should become easier. nine0003

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Personal expectations

It is difficult to transfer responsibility for a child's life. But even more difficult is not to hang on him the responsibility for yours. Many parents have the feeling that from now on their whole life should be dedicated to the child. Isn't it too heavy a load for a new person?

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Yes, you won't be as free as before. But child-centrism has never made anyone happy.

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Write down what you dreamed about before the birth of your child and carefully review this list. Some dreams really have to say goodbye. Do it consciously and allow yourself to experience the bitterness of what can no longer be realized. You have the right to feel sad. Stay with her. Come up with a small parting ritual, like a letter that you can burn.

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Now look at the dreams that are still alive. Think about what small step you can take towards realizing them right now. One action to feel that your life is still yours. nine0003

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This is much better than being angry at a child for giving him "the best years". After all, he didn't ask for it.

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Growth spurts and separation

Child irritation is part of the hormonal plan that nature has come up with for us. Moms who have stopped breastfeeding admit that they no longer feel such a deep connection with the baby, and sometimes they don’t feel like they belong at all. Parents of a teenager may notice that they no longer like the smell of their own child. Biology took care of all this: life is designed so that the chicks do not linger in their parental nests. nine0003

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Each crisis that you accompany a child, spending a huge amount of energy, ends for him with a transition to a new stage of independence. He needs you less and less. And instead of sharing the joy of his new skills, you may feel empty and used. This means that separation, separating yourself from the child, is not your meaningful goal. Perhaps deep down you find it difficult to trust nature and let him go.

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Task: meditate on the phrase "I will be an adult for you only as long as you cannot be one yourself" .

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