How to meditate with your child

3 Meditations for Kids and the Whole Family

Whether you're a parent, teacher, aunt, grandfather, babysitter or otherwise spend time with kids of any age, try out these three practices to introduce kids to meditation and mindfulness.

Meditation, yoga, and other mindfulness practices are more popular, and helpful, than ever. Studies have shown that teaching kids mindfulness practices can build students’ attentiveness, respect for fellow classmates, self control, and empathy, all while reducing stress, hyperactive behavior, ADHD symptoms, and depression.

Yet only 1.6 percent of U.S. children meditate, according to the National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health.

Giving kids the tools to help them fend off negative thoughts and behaviors, build self-confidence, focus, and treat others and themselves with respect and appreciation is a gift they will have for the rest of their lives.

U.S. Rep. Tim Ryan instituted the Skills for Life program in Ohio schools to teach deep breathing, meditation, and other problem-solving skills to elementary-aged kids. What they found was that these practices helped kids balance their emotions, cut down on bullying, and increased awareness, and both students and teachers are excited about the program.

Another study done in the San Francisco Unified School District with more than 3,000 students found dramatic improvement in overall academic performance, including a spike in math test scores for students who practiced mindfulness meditation and “quiet time.” In one rough middle school, where gunfire, fighting, and suspension rates were the highest in San Francisco, when “quiet time” was integrated into curriculum, suspension rates dropped by 45 percent, attendance rose, and grades improved significantly.

Whether you’re a parent, teacher, aunt, grandfather, babysitter or otherwise spend time with kids of any age, try out these three practices to introduce kids to meditation and mindfulness.

1. The Balloon

This guided meditation brings a visual component to a very simple deep breathing exercise. You can do this standing or seated.

1. Relax your body and begin to take deep inhales and slow exhales through the nose.
2. Start to take a slow, deep breath to fill your belly up with air, as if you’re trying to blow up a big balloon. Expand your belly as much as you can.
3. Slowly let the air out of the balloon (through the nose) as you release the breath from the belly.
4. Encourage your kids to feel their entire body relax each time they exhale, each time air is slowly being released from the balloon. You can even make a “hissing” noise to encourage them to slow down the exhale even more, “Like letting air out of the balloon.”
5. Continue for several minutes.

If the child you’re teaching is younger, you can add a little more detail and fun to the exercise to keep them engaged. Young kids, especially under the age of 6, love the extra movement when they’re learning to bring awareness to their breath. Encourage them to stand up in a relaxed way and follow these steps:

1. Ask them to think of their favorite color and picture a giant balloon of that color in their mind.
2. Then have them take a slow, deep inhale through the nose, filling up their tummies with air as if trying to blow up a giant [their favorite color] balloon. As an option, you can also have them stretch their arms open and overhead to represent expansion and the big balloon.
3. When their balloon is totally full, have them hold their breath at the top, and then you can “pop the balloon” for them (gesture finger to belly) and they can fall down as they exhale.

This one will likely elicit giggles and awareness of their breath.

2. Follow the Leader

This meditation works best for kids who are at least 5 years old. Ask your child to picture their best friend or a sibling—someone they do everything with or someone they look up to. Then ask them which one (your child or their best friend) usually leads. Usually one friend is the one who decides things—the one who is more of the leader; the other one is the friend who usually follows the leader. Ask them which they are.

If they are the leader, you can tell them to picture themselves as the breath. If they are the follower, you can ask them to picture themselves as the mind. For this example, I’ll pretend that they’ve chosen their big brother as their best bud, and the big brother is the leader.

Say something like, “So you and your big brother do everything together. Let’s pretend that your breath and your mind are best friends, too. And that you are just like the mind—the follower, and your big brother is just like the breath—the leader.” Then follow the steps below to guide them through the meditation.

1. Sit down comfortably and close your eyes.
2. Bring all of your attention to your breath and slow it down, taking deep inhales and slow exhales.
3. Let’s have the mind follow the breath—no matter what. Picture yourself as your mind, the one that’s following your big brother, your breath. Try to focus your mind on the breath and follow as the breath inhales and exhales.
4. Count your breaths at the end of every exhale. Don’t let your mind count before the end of the exhale. The mind always wants to jump ahead, but don’t let it. Allow it to remain focused on being the follower.
5. Count to 10 slowly, always at the end of each exhale, continuing to let the mind follow the breath.

3. Guided Relaxation

This practice is great for kids (and adults) of all ages, whether they’re having trouble sleeping, stressed out, sick and in bed, or acting out. It’s based on the progressive muscle relaxation technique that Dr. Edmund Jacobson developed in the 1920’s. It’s used to help alleviate tension when people are in a situation that makes it difficult for them to relax. Guide your kids with these steps:

1. Sit down or lie down comfortably and close your eyes. You can use pillows or blankets to make yourself as comfortable as you can be.
2. Take a few deep, cleansing breaths as you begin to relax.
3. Bring all of your attention to your right foot, noticing how it feels. Squeeze the right foot, making a fist with your entire right foot and all five toes; tense and squeeze it tightly. Hold this tension for two deep breaths.
4. Then release all tension in the right foot suddenly. Relax it completely and notice the tension release. You may feel a tingling sensation in the foot.
5. Take a deep breath, and then move on…
6. Move your attention to your left foot. Same instructions as for the right foot.
7. Move slowly up and around the body, squeezing one body part at a time to create tension, immediately followed by the contrasting sensation of release and ease. Follow each part with a deep, cleansing breath. Here’s a sample progression you can follow:

• Right foot, left foot
• Right ankle and calf, left ankle and calf
• Right knee, left knee
• Right thigh, left thigh
• All feet and legs
• Hips
• Butt
• Belly
• Entire lower body, from tummy down
• Chest and heart
• Right arm, left arm
• Right hand, left hand
• Shoulders
• Neck
• Face
• Whole body at once (do this one twice)

When you’re finished guiding your child through the relaxation technique, make sure they spend at least a few minutes in quiet, encouraging them to keep their breathing slow and steady.

Download the Chopra Meditation & Well-Being App now for more powerful tools that will help your children find peace and calm in any situation—a skill that will benefit them into adulthood.

7 Tips to Teach Children Mindfulness & Meditation

And here's the thing: Even if kids don't fully understand the "what" and "why" of mindfulness, it's very important they start learning the "how." Research shows that mindfulness education in schools has proven benefits: it increases optimism and happiness in classrooms, decreases bullying and aggression, increases compassion and empathy for others and helps students resolve conflicts.

Feel free to try these at home!

1.

The Bell Listening Exercise

Ring a bell and ask the kids to listen closely to the vibration of the ringing sound. Tell them to remain silent and raise their hands when they no longer hear the sound of the bell. Then tell them to remain silent for one minute and pay close attention to the other sounds they hear once the ringing has stopped. After, go around in a circle and ask the kids to tell you every sound they noticed during that minute.

This exercise is not only fun and gets the kids excited about sharing their experiences with others, but really helps them connect to the present moment and the sensitivity of their perceptions.

2.

Breathing Buddies

Hand out a stuffed animal to each child (or another small object). If room allows, have the children lie down on the floor and place the stuffed animals on their bellies. Tell them to breathe in silence for one minute and notice how their Breathing Buddy moves up and down, and any other sensations that they notice.

Tell them to imagine that the thoughts that come into their minds turn into bubbles and float away. The presence of the Breathing Buddy makes the meditation a little friendlier, and allows the kids to see how a playful activity doesn't necessarily have to be rowdy.

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3.

The Squish & Relax Meditation

While the kids are lying down with their eyes closed, have them squish and squeeze every muscle in their bodies as tightly as they can. Tell them to squish their toes and feet, tighten the muscles in their legs all the way up to their hips, suck in their bellies, squeeze their hands into fists and raise their shoulders up to their heads.

Have them hold themselves in their squished up positions for a few seconds, and then fully release and relax. This is a great, fun activity for "loosening up" the body and mind, and is a totally accessible way to get the kids to understand the art of "being present."

4.

Smell & Tell

Pass something fragrant out to each child, such as a piece of fresh orange peel, a sprig of lavender or a jasmine flower. Ask them to close their eyes and breathe in the scent, focusing all of their attention only on the smell of that object. Scent can really be a powerful tool for anxiety-relief (among other things!).

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5.

The Art Of Touch

Give each child an object to touch, such as a ball, a feather, a soft toy, a stone, etc. Ask them to close their eyes and describe what the object feels like to a partner. Then have the partners trade places. Both this exercise and the previous one are simple, but compelling, ways to teach the kids the practice of isolating their senses from one another, and tuning into distinct experiences.

6.

The Heartbeat Exercise

Have the kids jump up and down in place for one minute. Then have them sit back down and place their hands on their hearts. Tell them to close their eyes and feel their heartbeats, their breath, and see what else they notice about their bodies.

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7.

Heart-To-Heart

In this exercise, the meaning of "heart" is less literal. In other words, this activity could also simply be called "Let's talk about feelings." So sit down and casually, comfortably ask the children to tell you about their feelings. What feelings do they feel? How do they know they are feeling those feelings? Where do they feel them in their bodies? Ask them which feelings they like the best.

Then ask them what they can do to feel better when they aren’t feeling the feelings they like best. Remind them that they can always practice turning their thoughts into bubbles if they are upset, they can do the Squish and Relax Meditation if they need to calm down, and they can take a few minutes to listen to their breath or feel their heartbeats if they want to relax.

The takeaway.

My hope for the mindfulness class was to give the kids some tools they can use anytime: tools to calm down, slow down and feel better when they are troubled. I sure wish I had these tools at my disposal when I was their age. Imagine if all the children around the Earth learned to use these tools during their childhoods. What a change our world would experience within just one generation!

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How to Meditate: Techniques for Children and Adults

photo: Victor Carcia

Irina Pischikova, marketing specialist, coordinator of the International Ripa Awareness Meditation Program in Russia and mother of a 5-year-old son, gave us two meditation techniques, as well as a list of books on meditation and told us where to study in a group.

Children of all ages can meditate. In this way, they gain access to their inner strength and to those processes that will help them solve their problems. As a rule, meditation techniques for children are divided by age: from 5 to 7 years old, from 8 to 10 years old and from 11 to 16 years old. nine0005

With kids from 5 years old, it is best to do “creative meditation”, which is not like meditation in the classical sense. For example, paint with sand or assemble a mosaic. For children from 8 years old, short sessions are suitable - no more than 5-7 minutes - with switching attention to various objects.
For older groups, the meditation session can gradually become longer.

I don't teach meditation classes for children, but I thought I'd share with you how I meditate with a child at home.
First of all, the child should see someone's example. Therefore, the most correct thing is when a child sees a meditating adult. If you are planning to start meditating with your child at home, start simple with mindful breathing. It will be useful for both you and him. nine0005

Mindful breathing technique for practicing with children

1/. Sit next to your child on a cushion, cross your legs, or take a comfortable position in a chair.

2/. If you are sitting in a chair, make sure your feet are firmly planted on the floor.

3/. Close your eyes. Relax.

4/. Focus on your own breathing. Breathe softly and naturally.

5/. Put your child's hand on his stomach and ask him to slowly exhale and inhale. nine0005

6/. Feel your stomach rise and fall under your arm as you exhale and inhale.

7/. Exhale and feel your belly getting smaller.

8/. Take a breath and feel your belly getting bigger, inflating like a balloon.

9/. Sit quietly and breathe in a relaxed manner, feeling your belly shrink with each exhalation and expand with each inhalation.

10/. Sit and breathe like this for 2-5 minutes. Perhaps after a few sessions, the child will want to extend the time of meditation - let him do it. nine0005

11/. Then open your eyes and stretch a little.

12/. Gently stretch your fingers and toes.

13/. Sit still for a while.

14/. Look around you and listen to the sounds of the world around you.

Where to meditate in a group

At the Ripa Center, founded by Buddhist master and author of the Ripa Awareness Meditation Jigme Rinpoche (I talked about him in the previous column) from Tuesday to Saturday there are regular one-hour meditation classes for adults. In the future, it is planned to organize meditation classes especially for children of different ages.

Later, the mindfulness meditation technique will be integrated into schools and various educational institutions in Russia. For example, already now, together with the Institute of Practical Psychology of the Higher School of Economics, we are thinking about launching a joint 5-month course in mindfulness meditation, upon completion of which a certificate will be issued. Foreign experience of educational institutions in Canada, the USA, and India shows that meditation has a positive effect on students, improving their emotional state and learning comprehensibility. nine0005

While children should certainly be encouraged to meditate, their participation should still be voluntary.

What to read about meditation

If you want to delve into the topic of meditation specifically for children, then I recommend reading books by authoritative authors:

1/. The book “Seeds of Mindfulness. Mindfulness Practices for Children" by Thich Nhat Hanh

2/. Rinpoche Yongey Mingyur, Hayden Tory “Tashi. The Puppy Who Learned to Meditate”

3/. Ciel Claridge "Little Buddhas...and also their parents!"

Before you start teaching meditation to a child, you need to start with yourself - with an adult :)

Next, I offer a meditation technique for adults. Of course, it will be useful not only to mothers and those who plan to become her in the near future. This technique is suitable for adults regardless of age, marital status and experience in meditation or other practices.

You can just stop, sit down and become aware of the breath at any moment in your life, anywhere. Just sit for 5 minutes and just breathe. nine0005

There are many meditations: on sound, with voice, with visualizations. But essentially they are all based on mindfulness meditation. The technique of conscious breathing is the simplest, most accessible. For breath is something that is always present with you. So you can just stop, sit down and become aware of the breath at any moment in your life, anywhere. Just sit for 5 minutes and just breathe.

I recommend everyone to start with the Shamatha technique. This meditation practice was handed down to us during the time of the historical Buddha and has survived to this day, retaining its authenticity, and therefore depth. nine0003 (Shamatha is a type of meditation in Buddhism, its goal is to achieve mental peace, as well as the very state of clarity of consciousness - ed.).

Shamatha meditation technique for adults

1/. We sit on the pillow with crossed legs. If this is not possible, then sit on a chair. It is important to keep your back straight and not lean on anything. Feet (if you are sitting on a chair) should be in close contact with the floor surface, always remain in one place to avoid constant fidgeting. nine0005

2/. We straighten the back.

3/. The shoulders are relaxed, slightly lowered, the chest is fully open.

4/. The head is straight, the chin is slightly pressed to itself, but not lowered. So that the gaze is not directed to the sky, and the head does not throw back.

5/. We direct our gaze along the line of the nose into the space in front of us. The eyes are relaxed, unfocused and half open. If you are more comfortable with your eyes closed, you can cover them.

6/. The tip of the tongue gently touches the upper palate, this allows you to relax the jaws and muscles of the face, the mouth is covered. nine0005

7/. Place your hands relaxed on your knees, palms down.

8/. Now, while in this position, you can breathe normally, freely, without trying to breathe in any special way. We just sit and breathe.

9/. We begin to observe our own breathing.

10/. We exhale slowly and then inhale. We start with the exhalation, as this is the Shamatha technique, which means “Remaining at rest” in translation.

11/. 2-3 minutes relaxed and natural breathing. nine0005

12/. We can also put our hand on the stomach and feel how the walls of the stomach fall with the exhalation, and with the breath the stomach fills with air.

13/. Then you can open your eyes, stretch, rest for 2-3 minutes and continue.

14/. We again take a comfortable position, straighten our back and continue to observe our breathing.

15/. We track with attention each exhalation and inhalation as one cycle and count the cycles of breathing to ourselves, starting from one.

Exhale and inhale -1, exhale and inhale again -2, and so we reach 7 breaths and again return to 1. Counting is an additional tool of vigilance. It helps direct the mind into the present moment of awareness of one's own exhalation and inhalation. nine0005

So we breathe and become aware of the cycles of our own breathing and count them from 1 to 7, then return to 1 again (several approaches).

Each time our attention is distracted from the breath by sensations in the body or thoughts that arise, we note to ourselves that we have been distracted, and again return attention to the breath, starting the count again from 1.

In this way we breathe for 5-10 minutes.

Then we open our eyes. We can sit in a relaxed state for a while, after which we can do our usual things. nine0005

A Parent's Guide to Helping Their Children

Today's youth experience anxiety and stress. Much more than it should. According to recent statistics published by the American Academy of Pediatrics,

Up to 30 percent of children and young adults will experience an anxiety disorder in their lifetime.

Parents and other caregivers should teach our children good stress-reducing habits and introduce them to mindfulness activities that help them grow, support mental health, develop self-control and self-esteem, and reduce anxiety. nine0005

One of the best ways to do this is through meditation. We cover everything you need to know about meditation for kids, including what the practice looks like, how to teach it, and why it works. While teaching mindfulness to children may seem like a daunting task for parents or teachers who want to improve their children's well-being, once you understand what mindfulness and meditation practice is, everything becomes much easier.

Overview: Meditation for Kids

In some ways it is not surprising that children develop stress disorders early. We live in a sensory world. There are real threats, and the unknown can be scary. Today's children suffer from attention spans and an inability to concentrate while studying, in the classroom, or even at play.

It is tempting to think that you can protect your children from all fears and stresses throughout their lives; the best answer is to explain how to deal with difficult times. Children's meditation can help them with this. nine0005

Establishing a solid meditation practice at an early age is a good intention for your children and for yourself as parents and educators.

Whether it's deep breathing exercises, guided meditations, sleep stories, yoga, or any other mindfulness-based intervention, there's no doubt that children of all ages will benefit from mindfulness training from an early age.

Diagnosis of anxiety and behavioral disorders in children has increased dramatically. nine0004