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How young can you leave a child home alone


Leaving Your Child Home Alone (for Parents)

Whether it's a snow day home from school, an unexpected business meeting, or a childcare arrangement that fell through, there probably will be times when you'll need to leave your child home alone.

It's natural for parents to worry when first leaving kids without supervision. But you can feel prepared and confident with some planning and a couple of trial runs. And handled well, staying home alone can be a positive experience for kids too, giving them a sense of self-confidence and independence.

Things to Consider

It's obvious that a 5-year-old can't go it alone, but that most 16-year-olds can. But what about those school-aged kids in the middle? It can be hard to know when kids are ready to handle being home alone. It comes down to your judgment about what your child is ready for.

You'll want to know how your child feels about the idea, of course. But kids often insist that they'll be fine long before parents feel comfortable with it. And then there are older kids who seem afraid even when you're pretty confident that they'd be just fine. So how do you know?

In general, it's not a good idea to leave kids younger than 10 years old home alone. Every child is different, but at that age, most kids don't have the maturity and skills to respond to an emergency if they're alone.

Think about the area where you live. Are there neighbors nearby you know and trust to help your child in case of an emergency? Or are they mostly strangers? Do you live on a busy street with lots of traffic? Or is it a quiet area? Is there a lot of crime in or near your neighborhood?

It's also important to consider how your child handles various situations. Here are a few questions to think about:

  • Does your child show signs of responsibility with things like homework, household chores, and following directions?
  • How does your child handle unexpected situations? Does your child stay calm when things don't go as planned?
  • Does your child understand and follow rules?
  • Can your child understand and follow safety measures?
  • Does your child use good judgment?
  • Does your child know basic first-aid?
  • Does your child follow your instructions about staying away from strangers?
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Make a "Practice Run"

Even if you're confident about your child's maturity, it's wise to make some practice runs, or home-alone trials, before the big day. Let your child stay home alone for 30 minutes to an hour while you remain nearby and easily reachable.

When you return, discuss how it went and talk about things that you might want to change or skills that your child might need to learn for the next time.

Handling the Unexpected

You can feel more confident about your absence if your child learns some basic skills that might come in handy during an emergency. Organizations such as the American Red Cross offer courses in first aid and cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) in local places like schools, hospitals, and community centers.

Before being left home alone home alone, your child should know:

  • when and how to call 911 and what address information to give the dispatcher
  • how to work the home security system, if you have one, and what to do if the alarm is accidentally set off
  • how to lock and unlock doors
  • how to work the phone/cellphone (in some areas, you have to dial 1 or the area code to dial out)
  • how to turn lights off and on
  • how to operate the microwave
  • what to do if:
    • there's a small fire in the kitchen
    • the smoke alarm goes off
    • there's a tornado or other severe weather
    • a stranger comes to the door
    • someone calls for a parent who isn't home
    • there's a power outage

Regularly discuss some emergency scenarios — ask what your child would do if, for example, he or she smelled smoke, a stranger knocked at the door, or someone called for you while you're gone.

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Before You Leave

When you decide that your child is ready to stay home alone, these practical steps can make it easier for you both:

Schedule time to get in touch. Set up a schedule for calling. You might have your child call right away after school, or set up a time when you'll call home to check in. Make sure your child understands when you're available and when you might not be able to answer a call. Create a list of friends your child can call or things your child can do if lonely.

Set ground rules. Set special rules for when you're away and make sure that your child knows and understands them. Consider rules about:

  • having a friend or friends over while you're not there
  • rooms of the house that are off limits, especially with friends
  • TV time and types of shows
  • Internet and computer rules
  • kitchen and cooking (you might want to make the oven and utensils like sharp knives off limits)
  • not opening the door for strangers
  • answering the phone
  • getting along with siblings
  • not telling anyone he or she is alone

Stock up. Make sure your house has everyday goods and emergency supplies. Stock the kitchen with healthy foods for snacking. Leave a precise dose of any medicine that your child needs to take, but don't leave medicine bottles out — it could lead to an accidental overdose or ingestion, especially by younger siblings.

Leave flashlights handy in case of a power outage. Post important phone numbers — yours and those of friends, family members, the doctor, police, and fire department — that your child might need in an emergency.

Childproof your home. No matter how well your child follows rules, secure anything that could be a health or safety risk. Lock them up and put them in a place where kids can't get to them, such as:

  • alcohol
  • prescription medicines
  • over-the-counter medicines that could cause problems if taken in excess, like sleeping pills, cough medicine, etc.
  • guns (if you keep one, make sure it is locked up and leave it unloaded and stored away from ammunition)
  • tobacco
  • car keys
  • lighters and matches

Don't forget that pets can be great company for kids who are home alone. Many kids feel safer with a pet around — even a small one, like a hamster, can make them feel like they have a companion.

So cover your bases and relax. With the right preparation and some practice, you and your child will get comfortable with home-alone days in no time!

Reviewed by: Steven Dowshen, MD

Date reviewed: May 2018

When Can You Leave a Child Home Alone?

Having to leave a child home alone isn't an easy decision, even with a fully capable child and when your trip to the store is just going to last a few minutes. Depending on where you live, there may be laws in place to help you make that decision and to know where the state draws the line at neglect. In this article, you'll learn about laws for when you can leave a child home alone, including helpful guidelines covering:

  • when children can be left home alone by age;
  • when you can tell whether a child is capable of being left home alone; and
  • safety tips for when you leave a child home alone.

Leaving a Child Home Alone and the Law

Only a couple of states specify a legal age to leave a child home alone, including Maryland (age 8) and Illinois (age 14). However, most states have guidelines with the Department of Health and Human Services or other child protective agencies that test a child's ability to be left home alone. Factors may include the child's age and maturity, the overall safety of the surrounding area/circumstances, and arrangements made to secure the child's safety.

Below are general guidelines to follow when considering the age range when can you leave kids home alone:

  • 7 & Under - Should not be left alone for any period of time. This may include leaving children unattended in cars, playgrounds, and backyards. The determining consideration would be the dangers in the environment and the ability of the caretaker to intervene.
  • 8 to 10 Years - Should not be left alone for more than 1½ hours and only during daylight and early evening hours.
  • 11 to 12 Years - May be left alone for up to 3 hours but not late at night or in circumstances requiring inappropriate responsibility.
  • 13 to 15 Years - May be left unsupervised, but not overnight.
  • 16 to 17 Years - May be left unsupervised (in some cases, for up to two consecutive overnight periods).

How to Know If a Child Is Ready to Stay at Home Alone

It's important to note that no two children are alike, and parents must decide on a case-by-case basis what's best for their child. Therefore, in addition to the general guidelines listed above, a parent or caretaker should consider the following before they leave a child home alone:

  • The age and maturity level of the child;
  • The length of time the child will need to stay home alone;
  • Whether the child works well independently and follows directions;
  • The age and number of other children being left at home;
  • The safety of the surrounding neighborhood;
  • Willingness of neighbors to check in with the child during the day; and
  • Whether the child would feel "safe" staying home alone.

When Can You Leave a Child Home Alone: Safety Tips

Finally, if leaving kids home alone is a necessity -- at least where older children are involved -- you can follow the following recommendations:

  • Have the child memorize their full name, address, and telephone number.
  • Post a list of emergency, local, and long distance numbers to call in the event of an emergency.
  • Call the child several times during the day while you are away.
  • Teach the child how to work the locks on windows and doors and to lock them when at home.
  • Tell the child not to go into other people's home (even neighbors) without your permission.
  • Designate a "safe house" to run to if the child ever feels that they're in danger.
  • Never allow a child to work the oven or stove without a parent or adult caretaker.
  • Consider programs offered by schools, organizations, and churches as an alternative to leaving a child home alone for extended periods time.

In addition to the suggestions listed above, it's always a good idea to inform immediate neighbors that your child may be home alone on some days. Not only can a neighbor be a good resource in the event of an emergency, it can help alleviate potential calls to child protective services by unaware neighbors.

Questions About Leaving a Child Home Alone? Get Legal Help Today

Is your child too young to be at home alone? That question is never an easy one to answer, but the law in your state does provide guidance. Because your child's safety is of paramount importance, speak with a legal expert who can provide you with a clear answer. A family law attorney in your jurisdiction will be able to explain the laws of your state and help you understand how to comply with them.

Home alone: ​​at what age is a child ready to be left without adults?

Can I leave my child at home alone? For an hour? And for two? With tablet or without? At what age? Every parent invariably faces these questions, because the moment when you desperately need to “run out for literally five minutes” comes to everyone. Especially for "Oh!" this topic is considered by our expert, child psychologist Anna Skavitina, not only from a psychological point of view, but also from the point of view of the law. nine0003

Anna Skavitina, psychologist, analyst, member of the IAAP (International Association of Analytical Psychology), supervisor of the ROAP and the Jung Institute (Zurich), expert of the journal "Psychologies"

— Help us! My son is not left alone for a minute, I can't even go to the pharmacy. And he is already 5 years old!

- He is 5 years old, and you want him to stay at home alone, without adults?

- Well, yes! Mothers on the playground say that their children are left alone calmly. Tablet in hand - and that's it, silence. You can even go to the supermarket. It doesn't save my tablet, it hangs on me anyway. My mother also left me at home from the age of three. Milk and a sandwich on the table, and ran away on business. I was sad, of course, but I didn’t get hysterical, I didn’t cling to her. nine0003

— Yes, it happened to many children. In the USSR, there was not even a law that would regulate at what age a child can be left at home alone. When would parents work if they were busy looking after children? No wonder this generation is called the generation of "Uncle Fyodor". No one was particularly surprised that a six-year-old boy lives alone in the village with a cat and a dog.

- What's wrong with that? We survived!

— Yes, they survived. Do you know the term “survivor error”?

— No. And what is it? nine0003

- The one who was left at home, and he did not survive, can no longer tell anything. This is the so-called survivor bias. But if I survived, then this is normal, or not so harmful. I survived! For example, parents beat their child in a soft spot, on the head, but they do it solely for the benefit and education, because they, the parents, once survived, coped with the same difficult and terrible situation. And since they survived, it means that it is useful or not so harmful for their child. After all, no one will remember those who were beaten, whose life turned out unsuccessfully, or even did not work out at all. Maybe they decided not to have children either. By chance. It just happened. Somehow, the children themselves did not start to have, and it’s impossible to find a loved one for family happiness, otherwise they would give birth to so many children. nine0003

Survivors answer you when you ask for advice. They once made the right decision for themselves, managed to adapt in difficult conditions. But it is not at all necessary that their advice will help you. And, of course, there are no universal recommendations, otherwise everyone would have been happy for a long time. One mother told me that her baby slept so well that in the evenings she went to the cinema. She said that he woke up only once - she found him screaming. Well, comforted me. How many times he broke down while she left him alone, we will never know. Alive is the main thing. She is sure that there is nothing wrong with leaving the child unattended while he sleeps. nine0003

— So you can't leave a child alone at the age of five? Is there a law?

- I'm not a lawyer, I'm a psychologist, but I know that there is a law in Russia. There is no direct prohibition or permission to leave children at home from a certain age in Russian legislation, there is only an indirect one. However, in the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation there is article 125 “Leaving in danger”, which says that leaving a minor at home, parents will be punished. Juveniles, according to the civil code of Russia - "minors who have not reached the age of 14 years." nine0003

Article 125. Leaving in danger had the opportunity to provide assistance to this person and was obliged to take care of him or himself put him in a state dangerous to life or health, -
shall be punishable by a fine in the amount of 50 to 100 times the minimum wage, or in the amount of the wage or salary, or any other income of the convicted person for a period of up to one month, or by compulsory works for a term of 120 to 180 hours, or by corrective labor for a term of up to one year, or arrest for up to three months. nine0003

Thus, in Russia, leaving a child without help is unacceptable until they reach the age of 14. It is also a violation of the law for a child under the age of 18 to be alone on the street and in public places without being accompanied by responsible adults from 22:00 to 06:00. If the child is staying somewhere away, then the parents are obliged to come for him. By the way, a lot of people just don't know this. If you left a child under the age of 14 alone at home - and nothing happened, then this is one situation, but if something does happen, then you bear criminal responsibility for this, among other things. But now we will discuss with you not the legislative framework, but why you should not do this, and also try to understand when you feel the need for this and what can be done to avoid such situations. nine0003

- I am literally chained to the child, I need to dress and collect it in order to go outside, to get to the pharmacy. This is not always convenient. It's easier to leave him at home and run out quickly.

— I agree. There are situations when it is difficult to go out alone with children, especially when you have more than one child, but several, or if the children are sick. Do you have a husband, neighbors, girlfriends, familiar mothers from the playground, relatives?

- Yes, but it's not always convenient to ask for them.

— I understand that it is difficult for mothers to cope without the support of another person. But this is a matter of your child's safety. And your responsibility. Do you know the phone numbers of all your friends in order to help each other out? Now in big cities there are many delivery services that can help in critical situations. nine0003

- No, I don't know the phone numbers. By the way, it's a good idea, you can create a general chat to help each other. But what's so terrible about running out for a minute if the child stays on his own and doesn't act weird?

- One day I stopped near a sobbing woman who had fallen and broken her leg after slipping on the ice. She called an ambulance and asked: "Is there someone at home?" She began to sob even harder, “Yes. Three year old child. One!" Mom decided to "shop around the shops while he sleeps." Where is the husband? Business trip. Does anyone have the keys? Yes, at my mother-in-law not far from Moscow. Did you call her? Not yet. Why? The mother-in-law will yell at me. I asked my mother-in-law to call immediately. The ambulance took the woman away on a stretcher - a double open fracture. They said that she would definitely spend a few days in the hospital. This is the situation of leaving the child in danger. I can understand that this woman was tired of sitting at home, she really wanted to go out for a while, she was used to doing everything herself, not asking anyone for help. She didn't expect anything terrible, of course. I will not tell other scary stories, believe me, I have accumulated a lot of them over the years of work, and resuscitators and traumatologists have a lot more. nine0003

We find it hard to believe that something could happen unexpectedly - to us, to the electrical wiring, to the gas stove. But this, unfortunately, happens, and often. Even if you have the most independent and responsible child in the world, he is not always able to cope with what is happening. When you leave home, even "for a moment", children may imagine that you are leaving forever! Any child knows that the safest place in the world is next to his mother, and tries, if possible, to stick to it. If a child does not let his mother out of his sight - this is the most striking indicator that he is not sure of his own safety, does not know how he can cope in different situations alone, without a mother. Our task is not to convince him in words - no one will believe you, but to teach him to act. The main thing in this matter is gradualness. Let's discuss how to teach your child to be independent so that later you can leave him at home safely so that he can cope with his life in the future. Our task is not to lead by the hand until old age, but to teach how to live and survive. nine0003

  1. Let your child play alone. First next to you, then in another room. So he will gradually be convinced that he may be alone for some time, but you are always somewhere nearby.

  2. Allow your child as much independent self-care activities as possible. Dress yourself, undress, pour water into a glass, use a fork and knife, cut a salad.

  3. Show where the food is, where the child can get it from. Try not to hide tasty treats in distant cabinets. Often children are looking for something to eat and climb into places where it is not safe. nine0003

  4. Show how to use household appliances correctly. Turn on and off the kettle, stove, washing machine.

  5. Teach them not to open the door to strangers, use the phone, know the numbers of parents, relatives, rescue services. Let all numbers be written down on paper and lie in a conspicuous place, and not just in the phone's memory. Just in case, say what you need to report by phone to the rescue service: full name, address, situation. nine0003

  6. Consider a safe window closing system from the moment your child starts moving around the apartment, that is, by the end of the first year of life. Mosquito nets often deceive children by giving them the false impression that they can be leaned on.

  7. A child should be able not only not to open the door to strangers, but also to quickly get out of the apartment if the source of danger is inside.

As soon as your child learns to be in an apartment on his own, that is, not to sit for an hour with a tablet, but consciously begins to understand how to cope with different situations inside the house, then the age of leaving him alone for a while will come. Some children can be left for a while already at 7-8 years old, others at 14-15 too early. In European countries, children from the age of 16 are allowed to be at home alone. In the US, everything changes from state to state, but today there is a ban on being at home alone if a teenager is under 15 years old. In some states, the age has been increased to 16-17 years. In Nevada, children under the age of 21 are not only allowed to be unsupervised at home, but also not to go outside after 21:00. In Japan, boys from 12 years old, and girls from 11 years old can stay at home without adults, and in India - from 8-10 years old. At the same time, marriages in this country are concluded at the age of 12-13 years. nine0003

The main thing is that the responsibility for children and testing their ability to stay at home alone lies with the parents. We are all afraid of external danger, we live behind iron doors, which, if something happens, cannot even be quickly opened. Children are locked up, often out of a false idea of ​​caring, out of fear, a desire to avoid trouble, to be good parents: let them sleep in the car - don’t wake them up, let them stay at home - don’t carry them with you, there are infections. Sometimes you just want to come to your senses, recharge with impressions, save yourself from parental burnout. Many parents themselves grew up with an abandoned complex - they were regularly left alone with a key around their neck, and they just as easily leave their children alone, not only not seeing anything special in it, but even with a share of pride: mine can already sit by themselves. It’s great if nothing terrible happens, but it’s almost impossible to forgive yourself if something happens to a child in the absence of adults. Left in apartments, cars, children turn out to be a terrible sacrifice to our fears and false ideas about safety. Take care of yourself and children. nine0003

See also:

How to teach your child to fall asleep on their own

In our own words: developing coherent speech in a child

5 tasks for concentration of attention that children can easily cope with

Photo: Zurijeta Boystock .com

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At what age can a child be left alone at home

Published: nine0106 October 18, 2021, 19:59

At what age can a child be left alone at home: Pexels

The task of parents is to protect and protect their children from danger. At what age and for how long can a baby be left alone? The legislative framework of the Republic of Kazakhstan and experienced psychologists helped to sort out this difficult issue. nine0031

The legal aspect of leaving children alone at home

Some parents believe that a child can be left alone on the street, in a car, at home as soon as he is one year old. What does the Law of the Republic of Kazakhstan say about this?

According to paragraph 2 of article 1 of the Law of the Republic of Kazakhstan dated August 8, 2002 "On the rights of the child in the Republic of Kazakhstan", a child is a person who has not reached the age of eighteen (majority). The legal representatives of the child (parents, adoptive parents, guardian, guardian, foster caregiver, adoptive parents, etc.) are obliged not only to create the living conditions necessary for the comprehensive development of the child, to educate him, to care for him, but also to ensure his safety. But there are situations when it is necessary to leave a daughter or son for some time at home without adult supervision. nine0003 Boy cooked food at home: Pexels

At what age is it legal to leave a child at home alone? In Kazakhstan, this decision is made by the parents. At the same time, they can be punished in cases of neglect of paternal and maternal responsibilities.

Parents who neglected their duties and left the child unattended are subject to Article 119 of the Criminal Code of the Republic of Kazakhstan dated July 3, 2014 “Leaving in danger”. Here it is written what punishments are provided for parents in such a situation. If the stay of children without adult supervision has led to loss of health or death, deprivation of liberty for up to 3 years is provided. nine0003

The government website Egov.kz provides a list of administrative penalties (fines of 3 and 7 MCI) that parents will incur if children are left unattended:

  • 6 in the morning;
  • visit entertainment establishments (gambling establishments, night clubs, cafe-bars, restaurants, Internet cafes, computer, billiard, bowling clubs and cinemas) from 22 to 6 hours.

Will the perpetrators be punished if trouble happens to a child who is not a citizen of Kazakhstan? The Law of the Republic of Kazakhstan “On the Rights of the Child in the Republic of Kazakhstan” (Article 2, paragraph 1) equalizes the rights of all children, unless otherwise provided by the Constitution, laws and ratified international treaties. nine0003

If there is an urgent need to leave the baby, it is the responsibility of the parent to take care of his safety. Conduct a briefing before leaving. The child must clearly understand that there are things that should never be done. Strict prohibitions are the same for all children and are as follows:

  • no one should open the door, even friends and neighbors;
  • you can't say on the phone or through the door that you are alone;
  • it is not necessary to open the windows, but it is better to use special locks so that the child cannot open them himself; nine0057
  • Do not play with electrical appliances, open gas or make fire.

The child should have a list of important phone numbers at hand: parents, ambulance, fire department.

The girl communicates online at home: Pexels

Psychological aspect: the readiness of the child and parents

It is dangerous to leave a child at home alone, because he can intentionally or accidentally endanger his health and life. In addition, the baby may begin to become hysterical and there will be a fear that his parents have abandoned him forever. nine0003

At what age is a child ready to be left alone at home? There is no single opinion. In psychology, it is believed that the age of each child's entry into independence depends on psychological readiness and the ability to weigh the consequences before committing acts.

Psychologists and teachers recommend leaving a child alone no earlier than from the age of 12, if he can use home appliances, understands the direct purpose of all things and is aware of the danger. A child of this age already has his own gadget, and parents can constantly be in touch with him. nine0003

How can you tell if a child is not ready to be left alone at home? Here are a few signs:

  • low level of development of the emotional-volitional sphere, including the inability to follow the rules;
  • fear of staying at home alone;
  • inability to occupy oneself independently, to play;
  • the child does not like being left alone in a room behind a closed door.

How long can a child be left alone at home? The thematic Instagram blog examines the age factors of children from the point of view of psychology:

  1. Under 5 years of age - it is unacceptable to leave a child alone. The emotional-volitional sphere is very poorly developed. Children often need help and are easily frightened.
  2. Children aged 5 to 7 should not be left alone. In case of urgent need (an urgent need to go to a store or pharmacy, pick up the parcel from the courier below) and the conditions (safety, briefing, means of communication) are met, it is permissible to leave the child alone in the apartment for 10–20 minutes.
  3. Child 7-9 years - Leave for no more than 30-40 minutes if prerequisites are met. nine0057
  4. Age 10-12 years old - a child can be left alone for 2-4 hours during the daytime.⠀

Sometimes parents themselves are not ready to leave a child alone. They are tormented by terrible pictures and feelings of guilt, but sooner or later they will have to give freedom to children. To prepare yourself and your child for independence, follow these recommendations: