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How to get custody of your child in michigan


Overview of a Michigan Custody Case

A custody case is one type of court case that can be filed to determine the rights and responsibilities of both parents towards their child. This includes custody (who the child lives with and who makes decisions for the child), parenting time, and child support.

Sometimes a person other than a parent can file a custody case, such as a grandparent or legal guardian. This article talks only about the most common type of custody case: between the child’s parents. If you are a guardian or non-parent relative who wants to file for custody, you can use the Guide to Legal Help to find a lawyer in your area. 

Can I File a Custody Case?

Filing a custody case is one way to get a custody order. If you already have a certain type of family court case that involves your child (for example, a support case or a paternity case), you may need to file a motion regarding custody in that case instead. Or if you are married to the other parent, a divorce or separate maintenance case may be a better option for you, depending on the circumstances.

You Can File a Custody Case If You and the Other Parent Are Not Married and Have an Affidavit of Parentage

If you and the other parent signed and filed an Affidavit of Parentage to establish paternity and you don't already have a court case regarding , you can file a custody case.

You can use our Do-It-Yourself Custody Case (Unmarried Parents) tool to prepare the forms you need. File your case in the Michigan county where your child lives.

You Can File a Custody Case If You Are Married to the Other Parent, but You Are Not Filing for Divorce or Separate Maintenance

Decisions about custody, parenting time, and child support between married parents are usually made in a divorce case. If you are married, living separately, and don't want to file for divorce, you can file a custody case. Another option is to file for separate maintenance. You may want to talk to a lawyer to find out if a custody case or separate maintenance case makes more sense for you. If you have low income, you may qualify for free legal services. Whether you have low income or not, you can use the Guide to Legal Help to find lawyers in your area.

To learn about separate maintenance, read Alternatives to Divorce: Separate Maintenance and Annulment. Michigan Legal Help does not have forms for separate maintenance or custody cases between married parents.

When You Can’t File a Custody Case

In some situations, you can’t file a custody case. You can't file a custody case if you haven't established paternity of your child. Or if you have an existing court case involving your child, you may need to file a motion for custody in that case instead of a complaint to start a custody case.

If Paternity Has Not Been Established

A father's legal paternity must be established before you can file a custody case.

To do this, the mother and father can sign and file a sworn statement called an Affidavit of Parentage. This is the simplest way to establish paternity. No DNA tests or court orders are needed. If there is any doubt about paternity, get a paternity test before you sign the affidavit. When you sign the Affidavit of Parentage, you waive your right to a paternity test. An Affidavit of Parentage often gets signed by the parents when their child is born, but it can be done any time during the child’s life.

However, an Affidavit of Parentage cannot be used to establish paternity if the mother was married to another man at the time of conception or birth, unless a judge has determined the husband is not the father.

You can use this Affidavit of Parentage form to establish paternity. Follow the instructions included with the form to complete and file the Affidavit of Parentage. The form must be signed in front of a notary public or a qualified witness. A notary can usually be found at a bank. After the Affidavit of Parentage is filed with the Central Paternity Registry, the father has parental rights. When there is an Affidavit of Parentage in place, Michigan law gives initial custody to the mother until either parent starts a custody case.

Once the Affidavit of Parentage is filed, either parent can file a custody case asking the court for an order deciding custody, parenting time, and child support. You can use our Do-It-Yourself Custody Case (Unmarried Parents) tool to prepare the forms you will need.

Signing the Affidavit of Parentage is voluntary. If either parent does not agree to sign it, it cannot be used to establish paternity. In that situation, the mother, father, or prosecuting attorney can file a paternity case. If the parties don’t agree about the child’s paternity, the court will order DNA tests. If DNA tests show the alleged father is the biological father, the judge will sign an Order of Filiation. An Order of Filiation establishes paternity, making the alleged father the legal father. Custody, parenting time, and child support decisions would then be made in the paternity case.  

If You Already Have a Family Law Case

If there is already a family law case involving the paternity, custody, or support of your child, any new custody decisions should be made in that case. Either parent can file a Motion Regarding Custody in the existing case to get or change a custody order.

Your situation may be more complicated if you have a family law case from another state, but you and your child live in Michigan now. If you are in this situation, talk to a lawyer. If you have low income, you may qualify for free legal services. Whether you have low income or not, you can use the Guide to Legal Help to find lawyers in your area.

If the Mother Was Married to Someone Else While Pregnant

A husband is the legal father of a child conceived or born during his marriage. No one can sign an Affidavit of Parentage for a child who already has a legal father. To change the legal father, the mother, her husband, or the biological father must first get a court order revoking (undoing) the husband's paternity.

To ask the judge to revoke the husband's paternity, you must file a Motion or Complaint to Determine Child Born Out of Wedlock. You can use the Do-It-Yourself Revoke Paternity Established by Marriage tool to prepare the forms you need to do this.

If the judge revokes the husband's paternity, then the biological father can become the new legal father by Affidavit of Parentage or court order. To learn more, use the I Need to Revoke Paternity Established by Marriage: Tools for the Mother toolkit or the I Need to Revoke Paternity Established by Marriage: Tools for the Biological/Alleged Father toolkit.

If the biological father becomes the legal father by signing an Affidavit of Parentage, either he or the mother can start a custody case. If the judge signs an order making him the legal father, either party can file a Motion Regarding Custody in the paternity case to get or change a custody order.

What If My Child's Other Parent Is in Prison or on Active Military Duty?

Military Duty

Your custody case can be complicated if your child’s other parent is on active military duty. It may be difficult to find and serve papers on a service member stationed overseas. There are also state and federal laws that give people on active duty extra protections in civil cases. The service member parent can request a stay or an extension of the stay at any time before the final order. If the other parent doesn’t file an Answer to your custody complaint, the court must appoint a lawyer for them before it can enter a final order. If you are filing for custody and the child’s other parent is on active military duty, you may want to hire a lawyer. If you need a lawyer and have low income, you may qualify for free legal help. Use the Guide to Legal Help to find a lawyer or legal services in your area.

Prison

You must notify the court if your child’s other parent is in prison. In your complaint, you must state the following:

  • That the other parent is incarcerated
  • The other parent’s prison number
  • The other parent’s location
  • That a telephonic or video hearing is required by Michigan Court Rule 2. 004

You must also have your child's other parent served with court papers even if they are in prison. To learn more, read How to Serve Custody Papers.

Where Should I File My Custody Case?

You must file your custody case in your child’s “home state.” A court in Michigan will only have jurisdiction if Michigan is your child’s home state. In general, your child must have lived in Michigan with a parent for at least six months in a row right before the case was filed (or since birth) for Michigan to be their home state. Michigan may also be the child's home state if the child is currently in another state, but Michigan was the home state within six months before the case was filed, and a parent continues to live in Michigan. If your child does not live in Michigan now, or has not lived in Michigan for the past six months, Michigan may not be your child’s home state. 

Even if you and your child are not U.S. citizens or if your child's other parent lives in another state, you can file a custody case in a Michigan court if Michigan is the child's home state.

Generally, you will file your custody case in the Family Division of the Circuit Court in the county where your child lives. If you’re not sure whether Michigan is the right state for your custody case or if you have an existing family law case involving your child, you may want to talk to a lawyer. If you have low income, you may qualify for free legal services. Whether you have low income or not, you can use the Guide to Legal Help to find lawyers in your area.

What If I Filed a Custody Case but Later Want to Dismiss It?

You can file a Dismissal (Domestic Relations) form any time before the other party files an answer or motion in the case. If the other party has already filed an answer or motion, you would have to get their agreement to dismiss the case. The case will continue if your child’s other parent filed an answer or motion and wants the custody case to continue.

If you dismiss your custody case and change your mind later, you’ll have to file a new case. Orders from the first case will not automatically be restored if you file another custody case later.

What Gets Decided in My Custody Case?

Your custody case will address the issues of custody (who the child lives with and who makes decisions for the child), parenting time, and child support.

Legal Custody and Physical Custody

There are two types of custody, legal and physical. Legal custody means having the right to make important decisions about your children, such as where they go to school, what religion they are (if any), and major medical decisions. Physical custody refers to the children's living arrangements.

Custody can be “sole” or “joint.” Sole custody means only one parent has custody. Joint custody means the parents share custody. If parents share legal custody, they must make important decisions about their children together. If parents share physical custody, the children live with each parent some of the time.

Parenting Time

Once physical custody is determined—joint or sole—parenting time must be established. Parenting time is the term used in Michigan for the time a child spends with each parent when parents do not live in the same home. When one party is awarded sole physical custody, typically that parent has a substantial amount of parenting time or time with the child, and the other parent has less. When parties have joint physical custody, although that doesn’t have to mean equal parenting time, it is often equal or close to equal.

Parenting time can be granted for specific dates and times, or it can be "reasonable parenting time." With reasonable parenting time, parents work out parenting time as they go, without a specific schedule. With reasonable parenting time, if there is a disagreement, you will need to file a motion for the judge to resolve the conflict.

If you have specific parenting time, that means there is a specific schedule. If you are comfortable talking with your child’s other parent, you may be able to agree on a parenting time schedule. If you cannot agree on a schedule, you may get a court-ordered schedule instead.

How Custody and Parenting Time Decisions Are Made

In many cases, parents are able to agree on the custody and parenting time arrangements for their court order. They can reach an agreement without the court's involvement, or with the help of the Friend of the Court. 

The Parenting Time Guideline created by the Friend of the Court Bureau is a helpful resource for parents who need to put together a parenting time schedule. The Guideline includes sample schedules you can use as a starting place to create your family's schedule. It also has information about the developmental needs of children at different ages in connection to parenting time. The Guideline addresses specific topics such as long distance parenting time, parenting time with a parent who is in prison, and how to address domestic violence situations.

If the parents can't agree on custody and parenting time, the judge will make decisions on these issues.

When a judge makes a custody decision, they have to consider the established custodial environment (ECE) and the best interests of the child. When they make a parenting time decision, they must consider the best interests of the child. 

Established Custodial Environment

The law says generally that custody arrangements for children should remain stable. Because of that, the judge will always ask whether the child has an established custodial environment (ECE) with one or both parents. If so, it will take more evidence for a judge to change the current arrangement.

When deciding if there is an ECE, the judge looks at what the child's life is like. For example, does the child look to one (or both) of the parents for love and affection, food, housing, and other needs? Is the child old enough to have been in the current arrangement for a significant amount of time?

If the judge decides there is an ECE, then the party who wants to change the ECE must show by clear and convincing evidence that the change is in the best interests of the child. 

If the judge decides there is no ECE, then the winning party will be the one who shows by a preponderance of evidence that the proposed custodial arrangement (the type of custody that party wants) would be in the best interests of the child.

The Best Interest Factors

If the parents do not agree on custody and parenting time, the judge will decide these issues based on the best interests of the child. This legal test requires the judge to consider the following factors:

Factor (a): The love, affection, and other emotional ties existing between the parties involved and the child;

Factor (b): The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to give the child love, affection, and guidance and to continue the education and raising of the child in his or her religion or creed, if any;

Factor (c): The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to provide the child with food, clothing, and medical care or other remedial care recognized under the laws of this state in place of medical care, and other material needs;

Factor (d): The length of time the child has lived in a stable, satisfactory environment, and the desirability of maintaining continuity;

Factor (e): The permanence, as a family unit, of the existing or proposed custodial home or homes;

Factor (f): The moral fitness of the parties involved;

Factor (g): The mental and physical health of the parties involved;

Factor (h): The home, school, and community record of the child;

Factor (i): The reasonable preference of the child, if the judge considers the child to be old enough to express a preference;

Factor (j): The willingness and ability of each of the parties to facilitate and encourage a close and continuing parent-child relationship between the child and the other parent or the child and the parents.  A judge may not consider negatively for the purposes of this factor any reasonable action taken by a parent to protect a child or that parent from sexual assault or domestic violence by the child’s other parent;

Factor (k): Domestic violence, regardless of whether the violence was directed against or witnessed by the child;

Factor (l): Any other factor considered by the judge to be relevant to a particular child custody dispute.

At the hearing on custody and parenting time, each parent will have the opportunity to present evidence related to the best interest factors above. 

When the judge considers the best interests of the child, the law does not require them to give each factor equal weight. The judge decides how much weight to give each factor. 

Other Parenting Time Considerations

In general, children have the right to be close to both parents. They have the right to parenting time unless the judge finds there is clear and convincing evidence that it would be a danger to the child's physical, mental, or emotional health.  

If the judge determines that a parent is dangerous to the child, they may order supervised parenting time or no parenting time at all. For example, this can happen if a parent is likely to:

  • Physically or sexually abuse the child
  • Fail to take care of the child and meet the child’s needs
  • Put the child at risk through alcohol or drug abuse
  • Put the child at risk of harm in some other way

How much and what type of parenting time each party gets will be up to the judge if the parties do not agree. Like custody decisions, judges make parenting time decisions by considering the best interests of the child factors listed above. The judge can also use the parenting time factors below to decide how often each parent has parenting time, how long visits are, and whether parenting time should be supervised:

Factor (a): Any special needs of the child;

Factor (b): Whether the child is nursing;

Factor (c): Whether abuse or neglect of a child during parenting time is likely;

Factor (d): Whether abuse of a parent during parenting time is likely;

Factor (e): The inconvenience and impact on the child of traveling for parenting time;

Factor (f): Whether a parent is reasonably likely to exercise parenting time;

Factor (g): Whether a parent has frequently failed to exercise reasonable parenting time;

Factor (h): The threatened or actual detention of the child with the intent to retain or conceal the child from the other parent or from a third person who has legal custody. A custodial parent’s temporary residence with the child in a domestic violence shelter shall not be construed as evidence of the custodial parent’s intent to retain or conceal the child from the other parent;

Factor (i): Any other relevant factors.

Child Support

Children have a legal right to financial support from their parents. Parents have a legal duty to support their children. A parent cannot avoid paying child support by agreeing to have their parental rights terminated or by agreeing not to have parenting time.

Michigan law requires judges to order child support based on the Michigan Child Support Formula unless the result would be unfair or inappropriate. You can use the MiChildSupport Calculator to find out what the Formula calculation might be in your case. If you do not have a lawyer, the Friend of the Court can calculate child support for you. In some counties, a meeting with the Friend of the Court will be scheduled soon after the custody case is filed. In other counties, the judge may refer your case to the Friend of the Court to calculate child support. If neither of these things happen, you can file a motion asking the judge to refer child support to the Friend of the Court.

Even if you and the other parent agree to a deviation (a support amount different from the Formula calculation), you still have to convince the judge that the Formula amount would be unfair or inappropriate. If you are asking for a deviation, you must fill out an extra form called the Uniform Child Support Order Deviation Addendum. Bring the form to your court hearing along with the completed Uniform Child Support Order.

The Michigan Child Support Formula Manual lists 20 reasons that the Formula amount could be unfair or inappropriate. They are called deviation factors. You can find them in Section 1.04(E) of the Manual. If you want to ask the court for a deviation from the Formula and any of these factors apply to your situation, bring them up at your hearing and refer to them in your Deviation Addendum. You may want a lawyer to help you with this. It can be hard to prove that there should be a deviation from the Formula.

You and your child’s other parent may not agree to a support amount less than what the court orders.

To learn more about child support, read Child Support in a Nutshell. To learn about the role of the Friend of the Court, read Friend of the Court Overview.

What Is the Court Process Like?

Your custody case will be in the family division of the circuit court in the county where your child lives. Court procedures vary from county to county, but you can expect the following steps in your case.

Starting the Custody Case

Each case starts with the plaintiff (the person asking for the court’s help) filing papers that ask the judge to establish custody for the child or children. If you file the case, you are the plaintiff. Your child’s other parent is the defendant.

You can use our Do-It-Yourself Custody Case (Unmarried Parents) tool to complete the forms you need to start a custody case. After you file your forms and have the defendant served with copies, the defendant has the option of filing an Answer and a Counterclaim.

The Answer is a document that responds to each paragraph of your Complaint for Custody, Parenting Time, and Child Support. In the Answer, the other parent should explain which parts of your complaint they agree with and which parts they disagree with. The other parent can prepare and download an Answer form using the Do-It-Yourself Answer and Counterclaim for Custody. They can find a checklist of step-by-step instructions for filing the Answer in the toolkit I Am a Defendant in a Custody Case.

If the other parent files an Answer and they don’t agree on all the issues in your custody case, you may want to consider talking to a lawyer. If you have low income, you may qualify for free legal services. Whether you have low income or not, you can use the Guide to Legal Help to find lawyers in your area.

Answer/Counterclaim or Default

If you are the defendant in a custody case (meaning the other parent filed the case), there are strict deadlines you must follow. To participate in the case, you must file and serve an Answer by the deadline on the Summons. Do this 21 days from the date of service if you were served in person (personally handed the Summons and Complaint for Custody) or 28 days from the date of service if you were served by mail or while you were outside of Michigan.

The Answer is a document that responds to each paragraph of the Plaintiff's Complaint for Custody, Parenting Time, and Child Support. In the Answer, you should explain which parts of the complaint you agree with and which parts you disagree with. You can prepare and download an Answer form using the Do-It-Yourself Answer and Counterclaim for Custody. You can find a checklist of step-by-step instructions for filing the Answer in the toolkit I Am a Defendant in a Custody Case.

You must file an Answer within the proper time period in order to avoid being in default. If a default is entered, you are not allowed to participate in the custody case unless you file a motion to have the default set aside and the judge grants your motion. If you are defaulted, the judge can make decisions about custody, parenting time, and child support without your input.

If you need a motion to set aside a default, you can use the Motion to Set Aside Default/Default Judgment (Domestic Relations) on the Michigan One Court of Justice website.

Serve (send) a copy of everything you file to the Plaintiff.

You can also use the Do-It-Yourself Answer and Counterclaim for Custody to prepare a Counterclaim. This is optional. A benefit of filing a Counterclaim is that if the Plaintiff fails to move the case forward, you as the Defendant would have the ability to keep the case going. For example, if the plaintiff was supposed to schedule the final hearing and did not do so, then you would be able to do it instead. This would prevent the court from dismissing the case for lack of progress.

Temporary Orders

Either party can ask the judge for a temporary order for custody, parenting time, and child support before the judge enters a final order. A temporary order is usually in effect until the final order is entered at the end of the case. Michigan Legal Help cannot help you ask for a temporary order. You may want to consider getting a lawyer's help to ask the judge for a temporary order if you think you need one. If you have low income, you may qualify for free legal services. Whether you have low income or not, you can use the Guide to Legal Help to find lawyers in your area.

Sometimes a party will ask a judge to sign an order without holding a hearing. This is called an ex parte order. This can happen if the judge believes serious harm will occur if an order is not entered right away. The parties will have the chance to object and present evidence later. For more information, read Ex Parte Orders in Family Court.

Friend of the Court

The Friend of the Court office assists judges in making custody, parenting time, and child support decisions. In some courts, the Friend of the Court arranges a meeting with the parties to investigate (gather information from the parties regarding custody, parenting time, and child support) and makes a recommendation to the judge afterwards. In other courts, the Friend of the Court will meet with the parties to try to help them agree on the issues, and will prepare a recommendation to the judge if the parties can't agree. Friend of the Court practices differ from court to court.

A Friend of the Court recommendation is not a court order until it is signed by a judge. You will get an opportunity to object to a recommendation before a judge signs it. If you object, you will have a hearing in front of the judge.

To learn more about the Friend of the Court, read Friend of the Court Overview.

Reaching an Agreement

If you and the other parent agree on custody, parenting time, and child support terms, you can ask the judge to sign an order that includes all the terms of your agreement. This is called a consent order. If you have a meeting with the Friend of the Court and tell them about your agreement, they may draft a proposed order for you. Otherwise, it is the plaintiff's job to prepare the consent order. You can use the Do-It-Yourself Custody Case (Unmarried Parents) to do this. If you already used this tool to prepare your other custody forms, you can log back into your saved answers and update them to include your agreement. Then download your updated order. For instructions on how to return to your saved answers, read LawHelp Interactive Instructions for DIY Tools. 

The judge must believe the terms you agreed to are in your child's best interests. The judge is likely to approve an agreement on custody and parenting time if the terms give the child time with both parents. 

If your agreement on child support differs from the Michigan Child Support Formula amount, the judge can only approve it if a party shows that applying the Formula amount would be unfair or inappropriate. For more information, read the section on child support above or read Child Support in a Nutshell.

Alternative Dispute Resolution, Settlement, or Trial

The judge may order you and the other parent to participate in an alternative dispute resolution (ADR) process to try to settle your case. This might be Friend of the Court mediation or another Friend of the Court meeting, or it could be mediation with a private mediator. To learn more, read Friend of the Court Overview and Mediation and Other Forms of Settlement.

If you and the other parent can't agree, you will have a custody hearing in front of a judge. Representing yourself at a custody hearing is not simple. If you get to this stage, consider talking to a lawyer. If you have low income, you may qualify for free legal services. Whether you have a low income or not, you can use the Guide to Legal Help to find lawyers in your area. If you are not able to get free legal services but can’t afford high legal fees, consider hiring a lawyer for part of your case instead of the whole thing. This is called limited scope representation. To learn more, read Limited Scope Representation (LSR): A More Affordable Way to Hire a Lawyer. To find a limited scope lawyer, follow this link to the State Bar of Michigan lawyer directory. This link lists lawyers who offer limited scope representation. You can narrow the results to lawyers in your area by typing in your county, city, or zip code at the top of the page. You can also narrow the results by topic by entering the kind of lawyer you need (divorce, estate, etc.) at the top of the page.

Final Order

After you reach an agreement or have a custody hearing, the court will sign a final order in your case. In general the plaintiff is responsible for preparing the final order based on the agreement or on what the judge decides, but in some cases the Friend of the Court may help you prepare a consent order if you and the other party have agreed on the issues.

A final order can be changed later, but it is not easy to prove that custody should be changed. To learn more, read Changing a Custody Order.

To learn more about getting an initial custody order, go to the I Need a Custody Order toolkit.

After the Final Order – Residence of Children

After a judgment or custody order is entered, the following apply:

  • The child’s residence may not be moved outside Michigan without the court’s approval;
  • The parent with custody must tell the Friend of the Court in writing if the child’s address changes; and
  • If the parents share legal custody of the child, the child has a legal residence with both parents and the “100-mile rule” may apply.

If either parent wants to move the child's residence more than 100 miles from where the child resided when the custody case was filed, the 100-mile rule requires the parent to get the court's approval first.

The 100-mile rule applies to moving within the state of Michigan unless:

  • You have sole legal custody
  • Your custody order allows you to move more than 100 miles away
  • The other parent agrees to the move
  • You and the other parent lived more than 100 miles apart when the custody case was filed OR
  • The move would bring the child closer to the other parent’s home

If you need to move to a safe place with your child to escape domestic violence, you may do so until the court makes a decision on your request to move.

To learn more, read Moving with Children After Separation or Divorce.

5 Steps to Open a Case (MI)

The custody process officially begins when either parent files (opens) a case.

Before filing, consider your options for deciding custody:

  • You can settle with the other parent and have a judge approve your agreement.
  • For help reaching an agreement, consider alternative dispute resolution methods like mediation and collaborative law.
  • You can let the Friend of the Court's custody recommendation become a court order.
  • When all else fails, you can ask a judge to decide in a final custody hearing.

Regardless of the route you choose, you'll need to file a case. However, if you plan to settle, you may want to finish your negotiations first.

Custody X Change is software that creates parenting schedules and plans you can file with the court.

Make My Michigan Plan Now

When you're ready to file, follow the steps below. If you have a lawyer, they'll prepare and file the forms for you.

Keep in mind that your county may have additional filing requirements. Contact your Friend of the Court office with questions.

Step 1: Determine your type of case

You'll open your case in the family law division of the county court where you live or where your children live. This division may also be referred to as the domestic relations division or, simply, family court.

If you're married to the other parent, you can file for divorce or separate maintenance (essentially, legal separation). Both types of cases address custody, parenting time and child support.

Unmarried parents must first confirm paternity.

If you've confirmed paternity by submitting a notarized Affidavit of Parentage to the Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS), file a custody case. (You can also attach the affidavit when you open the case.) A custody case includes orders for parenting time and child support.

If you need DNA testing to confirm paternity, you can open a paternity case. It will also address custody, parenting time and child support.

Alternatively, DHHS can help with DNA testing and child support. Afterward, you can open a custody case.

Step 2: Complete your forms

Fill out a(n):

  • Complaint (State your type of case, detail the parenting schedule and parenting plan you want, and explain why your requests are in the children's best interests. )
  • Verified Statement
  • Friend of the Court Questionnaire
  • Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction Enforcement Act Affidavit
  • Application for IV-D Child Support Services
  • Summons, which formally notifies the other parent of the case

In their place, you can use interactive forms for divorce (for married parents) or interactive forms for custody (for unmarried parents) from LawHelp Interactive and Michigan Legal Help.

Depending on your case and county, you may need additional forms. For example, if you can't afford the fee to file a case (around $250), complete a fee waiver request. If you have an emergency, write up a motion for an ex parte order. For domestic violence emergencies, you can use the interactive petition for a personal protection order instead.

The parent who opens the case is referred to as the plaintiff, and the other parent is referred to as the defendant. Both are litigants.

You're required to sign some of the paperwork in front of the court clerk (or a notary) and to make at least four copies of all forms. In some counties, the court clerk's office makes copies for a fee.

The clerk can only answer basic questions about the forms. Make sure to have an attorney review the documents, even if you'll represent yourself in court.

Step 3: Submit your forms to open the case

Turn your signed and copied forms into the clerk's office and pay the filing fees (or submit the fee waiver request). Your case is now open.

Your case will be referred to the Friend of the Court (FOC) office. Each county has different FOC procedures, so ask the clerk about your next steps.

Step 4: Serve the other parent

You're responsible for having the other parent served — in other words, notified of the case and given copies of the court documents — within 91 days of filing.

However, you can't do this yourself. Michigan law requires the server to be over 18 and uninvolved in the case.

See your two options for service methods below. If you fail to have the other parent served properly, your case could be thrown out.

If you can't locate the other parent for service, contact the court clerk to discuss your options.

In-person service

You can pay the sheriff's office or a private process server to deliver the papers, or you can ask a friend or relative to deliver them.

The other parent may immediately sign a copy of the summons and hand it back to the server. Then, you or the server must file the signed document as proof of service.

If the other parent accepts the papers but chooses not to sign the summons, the server must complete a proof of service form and have it notarized. Either you or the server must file the form with the court.

Certified mail service

You can also serve papers via certified or registered mail — but you still must have a server over 18 who is not involved in the case send them.

The defendant must sign the delivery service's return receipt to acknowledge that they received the papers.

The return receipt then gets delivered to the server, who fills out the proof of service form (above) and signs it in front of a notary or court clerk. You or the server should attach the signed return receipt and file with the court.

Step 5: Wait for the other parent to respond

The other parent must respond within 21 days of being served in person or 28 days of being served by mail.

To respond, they file an answer that says if they agree or disagree with each point of your complaint. They can also file their own complaint to make requests.

If they miss the deadline, the court will enter a default judgment without their involvement. This means the court will approve your requests, as long as they're in the best interests of the children.

Note for defendants: Even if you're okay with the plaintiff's requested arrangement, you should file a response so you can participate in the settlement process. In your answer, simply indicate that you agree with all of the requests.

Preparing for what comes next

The next step is a meeting with both parents and their assigned FOC case manager (unless the case involves domestic violence).

At this meeting, either the settlement process begins or the case manager explains the litigation process and your alternative dispute resolution options.

No matter which way your case goes, take advantage of custody technology to be fully prepared.

The Custody X Change app offers personalized parenting calendars for your required parenting time schedule, a parenting plan template for your optional parenting plan, a shared expenses tracker and much more.

Be prepared for every step of your case with Custody X Change.

Custody X Change is software that creates parenting schedules and plans you can file with the court.

Make My Michigan Plan Now

Custody X Change is software that creates parenting schedules and plans you can file with the court.

Make My Plan

Astakhov: A FLEX graduate in the US was adopted by a gay couple

The author of the photo, Getty Images

Image caption,

According to Astakhov, the host family was same-sex, but FLEX organizers denied this

a same-sex host family took custody there, said Pavel Astakhov, Commissioner for Children's Rights under the President of Russia.

In an interview with Rossiyskaya Gazeta, Astakhov refused to name the child, citing his parents' prohibition, but noted that the teenager was born in 1997. He was on the program in Michigan.

According to the Ombudsman, the young man was supposed to return to Russia in May, but did not.

The head of the American Councils for International Education, David Patton, partially confirmed Astakhov's words, but noted that no one registered custody of the child: he stayed in the US without permission, violating immigration laws.

Homecoming is a condition of participation in the Flex program, in which students from developing countries spend a year in the United States living with a family and attending a mainstream school. In total, over 8,000 people have taken part in the program in Russia over the course of 21 years.

"A Grain of Truth"

According to Astakhov, a same-sex couple offered the Russian to take care of him, despite the presence of parents in Russia, to which he agreed.

"I went under this program, studied in the state of Michigan, lived in a host family. As it turned out, this family was same-sex, two men," Astakhov said. close friendship."

According to David Patton, the host family was not same-sex.

The head of American Councils emphasized that the student completed the program without any incident, and his case is now being handled by the immigration authorities.

"This was not a direct result of the FLEX program," he said in an interview with Radio Liberty. "This is a problem that occurred after the program, that is, it is no longer our jurisdiction."

Patton said that the student was placed in a traditional family, but he developed "friendships" with a same-sex couple.

"There is indeed a grain of truth in everything that has been said," Patton commented on the statements of the Russian authorities in an interview with Buzzfeed.

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According to David Petrosyan, FLEX alumni coordinator in Moscow, the student's host family could not "turn out" to be of the same sex.

"Information comes in about which family you are going to. You must agree, and your parents must agree that you go there and live with this particular family," he says.

"FLEX students are placed with a wide variety of American families, including non-traditional families," Patton told Buzzfeed, referring to both single parents and same-sex families. However, according to him, the parents of the child are always aware of this in advance.

At the same time, Petrosyan stated that he did not know of a single case of schoolchildren from Russia being taken in by a same-sex family.

According to the TASS agency, citing the legal team of the Russian Embassy in the United States, the teenager asked for asylum in the United States, claiming that he was gay. American Councils does not comment on a teenager's sexual orientation.

According to the agency, Russian diplomats found out that the boy "met in church a couple of elderly homosexuals, former military men who had previously adopted two American boys," who "promised the teenager to become his sponsors and even pay for his studies at Harvard University."

"Peppered" story

The TASS report, for unclear reasons, emphasizes that, at the insistence of the US authorities, the teenager was allowed to meet with his mother only in the presence of lawyers who "also adhere to non-traditional sexual orientation."

"I think this is some kind of cheating. History is being peppered with different spices, which is sometimes absurd. At first they said that they were just an American couple, now they are a gay couple," Petrosyan comments on the situation. nothing dramatic happened, but then again .. ".

Russian-American journalist and LGBT activist Masha Gessen suggested on Facebook that although the TASS message is written in the spirit of "slandering America", the facts in it may well be true.

"He [the author of the message] insinuates that the boy is in a sexual relationship with a couple and emphasizes that even the boy's lawyers are homosexual, but it all fits so neatly with the worst nightmare of modern Russia that it doesn't seem like the story is not so good." heavily embellished," Gessen notes.

In her opinion, a student could indeed apply for asylum in the US because of his orientation, and a gay couple could offer him financial and moral support.

It's difficult to stay

According to Pavel Astakhov, in total, about a dozen schoolchildren did not return to Russia after cultural, rehabilitation, and tourism programs.

At the same time, in the case of FLEX, it is extremely difficult to stay in the US after the end of the program. Under the terms of the visa, which expires in June, students must return to their home country and cannot qualify for an immigrant or work visa for the next two years.

The author of the photo, David Petrosyan

Photo caption,

Schoolchildren are asked to wear identical T-shirts during flights so that no one gets lost. To simplify the process, during the return and return flights, everyone wears the same blue FLEX T-shirts.

"Usually, these T-shirts are given out at the very beginning. If someone has lost, they just ask to put on a blue T-shirt and write FLEX on it with white paint," says Petrosyan.

"I was given three dates to choose from [for returning to Russia] - three dates in June and one in May," he says. from different states in Chicago they collected in a large group, from there we flew to Washington, and from there - in a large group - to Moscow.

According to Petrosyan, he is not aware of cases when someone stayed in the USA. Some, on the contrary, return to Russia before the end of the program - if they do not like something or if they do not want to finish school in Russia a year later and are going to take final exams.

"Sorry for the guys"

Petrosyan himself spent a year in Louisville, Kentucky, and upon his return to Russia he entered the Higher School of Economics.

"This program brought only good things for me. This is an opportunity for children from regions who live far from Moscow to gain good experience, ambitions, aspirations. You come to Russia and want to achieve as much here as you achieved there."

The Future Leaders Exchange program was approved by the US Congress at 1992, so that young people from the countries of the former USSR have the opportunity to "get acquainted with the people and culture of the United States" and "teach Americans to better understand the people and culture of their home country. "

The program is fully funded by the US Department of State - including travel, stipend, and medical insurance.

US Ambassador to Moscow John Tefft said on Tuesday that he "deeply regretted the decision of the Russian authorities to shut down a program that for 21 years has built deep and strong ties between our peoples."

This year the children who won the competition have already flown to the US, but the selection for the new program has been cancelled. At the moment, more than 1.6 thousand people have signed a petition against the cancellation of the program addressed to the President of Russia.

"The guys who have already worked hard preparing for the FLEX competition and now will not be able to show their knowledge, of course, it's a pity," Pavel Astakhov admitted in an interview with Rossiyskaya Gazeta.

Eminem formed a difficult relationship with his mother: he cursed, sued, did not speak for years and "digged the grave" in the clip

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Mikhail Morozov

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Mom is one of the pillars of Eminem as a creator and media character: resentment, quarrels, childhood conditions, acceptance.

How it all started as a child: father gone, travelling, being beaten at school

Debbie got married at 15. She gave birth at 17. The operation took 73 hours. “I went through a living hell,” she recalled. The father left the family and often quarreled with the mother. She moved constantly with her young son and worked several jobs, but rarely lingered on any of them. At the same time, she tried to build a personal life, so Eminem was often raised by her grandmother and uncle.

He often did not have good relationships with other children. In one of the schools, he was beaten by his peers, and then Debbie filed a lawsuit against the school administration.

Eminem with his mother pictured

Inside Edition video screenshot

Eminem's early life: Mom let his teenage friends go, lost custody of her youngest son, and kept calling and calling and calling

When Eminem was 15, Debbie allowed them to take in twins who had run away from alcoholic parents. One of them was Eminem's future wife, Kim Scott.

In subsequent interviews, Debbie said that her son got everything he wanted - and reacted sharply to accusations that she failed to become a good mother.

When Eminem worked in a restaurant, he often moved alone - because of constant quarrels with his mother, his former manager thought so. Colleagues recalled that she often called him even at times when he, due to being very busy, could not answer the phone.

Neighbors disagree about what Debbie was like - some remember her as a sweet and devoted mother, others call her crazy.

Debbie has lost custody of Eminem's younger brother. The social worker suggested that she had Munchausen's syndrome (feigning illness in order to receive care and attention) - and this could traumatize the child's personality. Eminem himself later spoke about the same syndrome in the song Cleanin 'Out My Closet.

House that became Eminem's front cover and later demolished

The Marshall Mathers LP, which was released in 2000, is the house in Detroit where Eminem grew up. From 1989th to 2003 the house belonged to Debbie.

In November 2013, the house was damaged in a fire and demolished the same month, as Michigan authorities recognized it as unsafe. It was previously listed on eBay for $500,000, but did not attract interest, and in 2007 it was bought for $24,600.

Official website of Eminem

One day, Debbie won a court case because of offensive words in a song. Yes, a trial against his own son

My Name Is is the debut single from The Slim Shady LP, which was Eminem's first major label album. It has lines:

  • Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to
  • I just found out my mom does more dope than I do . The next step is a lawsuit against the son for defamation for as much as 10 million dollars. Debbie won the case, but the compensation was 400 times less - only 25 thousand. Moreover, Debbie received only $ 1,600 of them, the rest of the money went to the lawyer.

    But Eminem continued to attack. The track Cleanin' Out My Closet describes a difficult relationship with her. In the clip, he digs her grave. Eminem later said that his mother was cruel to him, and the memories of this come back and haunt.

    There is also a mention in the famous song Without Me. Eminem stated that he had settled his court cases (a hint of a lawsuit) and swore at Debbie.

    • I just settled all my lawsuits
    • Fuck you Debbie!

    Mother's themes were also found in less noticeable songs - Role Model, Kill You, My Mom, Marshall Mathers, Criminal.

    Debbie in 2001

    Video screenshot of Inside Edition

    Debbie wrote her autobiography: Eminem looks very different there

    The book was published in 2008 under the title My Son Marshall, My Son Eminem. Debbie wrote in it about her own childhood, marriage and relationship with Eminem. The stated goal is to tell the truth. According to Debbie, Eminem told a lot of lies in order to become famous:

    "What mother wants to be known as an alcoholic who is on pills?"

    She also said that Eminem developed manic depression, which he struggled with for several years, and the condition worsened after the birth of his daughter.

    In Great Britain the book became popular - more than 100 thousand copies were sold. And Debbie even released a disc Dear Marshall with three songs dedicated to her son.

    Rumors about Debbie's cancer in the 2000s: stage four, Eminem's help

    Here's what the media wrote about it: in 2003, Debbie found out about breast cancer, and a year later she went bankrupt. In 2006, there was such information: Eminem paid bills in the amount of more than $ 300 thousand. Then the press learned that Debbie was already in the fourth stage and that she was dying.

    Debbie's death was reported in 2010, but in fact Eminem's great aunt, a very close person to him, died of breast cancer that year. Grandma helped Eminem as a child. According to him, it was she who was for him "a real mother."

    Video screenshot of Inside Edition

    Eminem dedicated another song to her - on mother's day. And it's very different from the others.

    The track is called Headlights. Eminem admitted in the text that he did not think how much his words could hurt. And that the mother probably got it the most. "Did I go too far?" he asks. 9

  • My mom probably got it the worst
  • The brunt of it, but as stubborn as we are
  • Did I take it too far?
  • Cleaning out my closet and all them other songs
  • You're still beautiful to me, cause you're my mom

At that time, Eminem was already 41 years old. 59-year-old Debbie reacted in an interview with MLive.com: in fact, they did not communicate for 13 years, for several years she did not see him at all, although she tried to contact him. “I just want to hug him,” she said.

In 2021, Eminem opened Mom's Spaghetti in Detroit, a reference to a line from Lose Yourself, released nearly 20 years earlier.

Whether Eminem and Debbie communicate now is not very clear. Media periodically write that they have managed to maintain communication, which has become much better in recent years.

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