How many gifts should a child get for birthday

How many gifts should kids get? {A four gift rule alternative}

Christmas shopping demystified

Let’s face it, it can be easy for kids to get way too many gifts for Christmas! You keep getting ideas for things your kids will love and forget about all the other people that will be providing gifts as well. Before you know it kids are buried in too many presents and they hardly know what they’ve gotten.

Let’s talk about how many gifts they should get (including that 4 gift rule), how much to spend, how to limit gifts from others, and who else you should include on your shopping list without going totally broke. I’ll also throw in some tips for saving money and getting the best deals!

Am I some sort of Christmas present expert, no. So let’s just say right now that these are simply my opinions and ideas. Take them or leave them. Everyone has to create their own rules around gift-giving but I hope this post gives you some great ideas!

Recently the 4 gift rule has become quite popular. Basically you get each child something they want, something they need, something to wear, and something to read. I see a lot of moms proclaiming their plans to do this with their kids.

I am not a fan of the four gift rule. I loved getting gifts as a kid and as an adult, I love giving gifts. I could never limit myself to just 4. But I love the idea of using these as 4 basic categories. So mine might look more like a triangle:

Why is read the smallest portion? Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love books…but even at 3 my daughter already has a ton of books. Plus, books tend to be shared items and last for a while. If I got my kids more than 1-2 books we would quickly be buried under a mountain of reading material!

So while I love reading books with my daughter I limit my Christmas gift giving to just 1 or 2 new ones.

I think wants should definitely be the next smallest. Most kids already have way too many toys! Plus, there’s just no way they can get excited and interested in a bunch of toys at one time. What happens if you get them a bunch of toys is that something, usually several somethings, get completely forgotten about.

By the time they get to some of those toys they may not be interested in that anymore, let’s face it, kids tend to have fleeting interests, especially young kids. So keep the wants or toys section to a few items you know they’ll be excited about.

Don’t forget to clean house before the holidays as well! For young kids, send them off to grandma’s house or a friends and get rid of the small toys and stuffed animals that have accumulated. You know, the ones from kids meals and random stuffies they picked up or were gifted.

It’s also a great time to rotate out toys your kids have gotten bored with. For older children have them do this themself. You can list unwanted items on buy nothing or donate them somewhere to make room for new things.

You can even use this fun toy donation letter from Santa. Just grab your copy and fill it in for your child!

Download the letter

Needs are going to make up a good amount of the Christmas presents. They’re things you’d probably be buying anyway. And my favorite part of “need” gifts is that they are often things that get used up. That means they won’t be taking up space in my house all year round.

While some basic items are fine it’s fun to make them more giftish by getting a fun version of the need. Get the body wash that has their favorite character, gift things in special packages. Just do something to jazz up the need into a fun gift.

Need gift ideas:

• Body wash/shampoo
• Favorite Snacks
• Chapstick
• New sheets/blankets
• Room decor
• New items for school/sports

Stockings are a great spot to fill with small need items. I love to load stockings with lots of small items so it’s a bit of a fun hunt to see what’s in there all the way down to the toe. Don’t be afraid to open packages that have multiple items inside and stuff them down in there.

Need and wear could easily be flip flopped or just combined into one big base of the pyramid!

Christmas is a great time to get kids new must have items like socks and underwear (these also make great stocking stuffers). But also get them those new shoes they’ve had their eye on or shirts with their favorite characters.

In total I’d say 10-15 is a fair number of items to get, maybe more depending on how many little items are stuffed in that stocking. I’d expect to have 4-5 wrapped gifts, perhaps one large unwrapped gift from you or from “Santa” if you do Santa with your kids. The rest are small items that will reside in their stocking.

Any more than that and you’re probably wasting money on gifts that will never see the light of day! Don’t forget that other people will be buying gifts for your kids too. Grandparents, friends, even friends of grandparents have purchased Christmas presents for my kids.

These are people who I don’t know but hear stories about my kids from Grandma and Grandpa. People just love kids and buying gifts.

Encourage grandparents to limit gifts to 1 toy/want item and then focus on needs and clothing. They can also gets toys to be kept at the grandparents home for when the kids visit there so that you don’t have to lug half your house with you for each visit!

You can also ask them to get non-toy alternatives such as experience type gifts.

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Setting a spending limit is hard. Younger kids especially understand quantity more than cost. If they get 2 gifts because they cost more and their sibling gets 5 gifts they are probably going to feel slighted.

The real answer is to spend what’s within your budget. You can easily have a nice Christmas without spending more than $50-$100 per child if you shop smart. I’d say $150-$200 is probably a more reasonable expectation, perhaps more for older kids, especially if high priced electronics are coming into play.

Keep it to one more expensive gift per kid. If they have other expensive “wants” on their list some cash, presented in a fun way, can be a great gift without breaking the bank. It also encourages kids to save and work towards what they want instead of expecting to just be given these items.

If you’re giving cash a maze money trap is a fun idea (works great for gift cards too) or you can make this money notepad.

Check Price on Amazon

The list

To keep from ending up with a mountain of gifts for your kids make sure to have a plan. Make a list of potential gifts and discuss them with your spouse or other parents/caregivers. Decide which ones you’re going to get. For older kids, you can certainly have them make a Christmas list to give you some ideas.

Take your list and then check the Black Friday ads to see what you can get the best deal on! That will help determine which items make the cut for the “want” part of the pyramid.

I’ve been shopping Black Friday deals with my mom since I was about 12, back when you couldn’t shop online and you had to go wait at the stores at 3am. Now, you can access almost all the deals online from the comfort of your home, so there’s really no reason not to take advantage!

I also like planning early because then I can email all the grandparents the gifts that I already have dibs on as well as some potential gifts ideas for them (the items on my list that didn’t make the cut). It’s also a great time to remind them about any gift limits you’d like to suggest!

The money

It’s never a good idea to go into massive debt to buy gifts for other people! Get a special jug, envelope, or open a separate savings account (really easy to do with an online bank) to save money for Christmas shopping all year long.

Check out my list of 21 apps that will make or save you money. Squirrel away these extra bits you make with the apps and you can easily have enough money to pay for Christmas without wracking up credit card debt!

Other Kids in your life

I was an aunt before I was a mom so kids are always my first priority. I buy for most of the other kids in my life. I limit it to 1-2 items and usually set a cap of $15-20 per kid. There’s usually one each year that costs more but it tends to rotate. Sometimes I can even snag their gifts for $10 if I find awesome deals.

Parents and In-laws?

In my mind, once you have kids, you can’t really expect to receive gifts anymore. The same goes with your parents and grandkids. Once you have kids that become the star of Christmas festivities you don’t really need to buy gifts for your parents and in-laws anymore.

If you have the room in your budget to do it great! I love giving thoughtful gifts to as many people as possible. But, I had to really limit my shopping list once I had kids and became a stay at home mom. The now grandparents do get gifts but they are generally photos of the grandkids (Minted.com is a great place to order nice calendars or collages) or keepsakes that I help the kids to make.

Try these popsicle stick picture frames or keepsake wreath ornaments for great grandparent gifts if you have young kids.

If you’re worried that someone will be offended by the lack of gift just make it clear ahead of time what the expectation is. If they still get upset then that’s on them, not you. It’s not your responsibility or obligation to buy gifts for grown-ups, or kids for that matter.

Gifts are supposed to be a nice gesture, not an obligation!

Friends

The same goes for friends. For most friends, once you all start having kids, you stop giving gifts to each other. Just make sure to have a discussion and decide if you’re doing gifts or not so no one is left feeling uncomfortable.

My best friend and I still exchange gifts on years that our budgets allow but we often set an agreed-upon budget ahead of time.

Spouse

My husband and I do still give gifts to each other. It’s best to set an agreed-upon budget so that one person doesn’t go overboard.

Just don’t be like my dad and buy their gift on your shared credit card! He knew my step-mom always checks the account as she keeps track of their budget and bookkeeping so she knew exactly what he bought her for Christmas!

Phew, so there you have it, my guide to gift giving during the holiday season. Hopefully this gave you some great ideas about how to plan for your holiday gift giving, who to buy for, and how many gifts to get for your kiddos. Feel free to let me know your thoughts in the comments!

Need gift ideas? Check out our gift guide page full of ideas for everyone on your list. You’ll find over 25 lists of gift ideas there so you’re sure to find something for everyone!

Four gift rule alternative

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How Many Gifts Should a Child Get for a Birthday

Looking into the pile of gifts prepared for your child’s birthday gets you thinking: Is this over-excessive? Should you have stopped, like, ten gifts ago? Are there any rules you should follow when buying gifts? These are all legitimate questions. The question of what impact could the number of gifts have on a child’s development is quite serious. You have to think of all the things that will shape your child’s personality, and gifts are one of those things.

The major concern here is whether you’ll spoil your child with a large number of gifts and make her/him focus on material stuff later in life. The truth is, that could happen. When you buy many gifts, children focus on the numbers rather than the gifts themselves. Their eyes drift away, and they become more concerned with opening all the boxes instead of appreciating what they got. If this happens all over again for all birthdays, Christmas celebrations, and other gift-giving events, it can reflect on their lives in general. They might become too concerned with numbers and the importance of material stuff. You want to teach your children that happiness, in most cases, isn’t related to material goods. To do so, you need a strategy!

Luckily, you can choose between several approaches when planning your child’s birthday. You can avoid gift-giving in general, lower the number of gifts, or do some other things. The key is to choose the way you think is best for your child, but you have to know what options you have in the first place. That’s why we have listed some of the possible alternatives to buying numerous gifts and tried to answer some of the parent’s burning questions regarding the topic. Hopefully, our answers and recommendations will help you answer the question of how many gifts should a child get for a birthday and decide on actual numbers.

Table of Contents

Should you throw a birthday party for your child or not? Well, that mostly depends on your personal preferences. Nowadays, parents tend to seek for alternatives, considered with the impact of ever-growing consumerist tendencies on their children. However, birthday parties don’t have to be centered around expensive stuff, and children do enjoy them a lot. They get to play with their friends, have fun, and eat a little bit more candies than regularly. Who can say no to candies and delicious food?

If you’re considering making a special request for your child’s birthday (e. g. asking for particular gifts, monetary donations for college, etc.) you can take a look at this article How to Ask for Presents on Invitations. It will give you the necessary guidance on the topic.

Recent studies have shown that most parents spend more than 400 dollars for children’s birthday parties. No wonder why those on a limited budget raise their voice against such practices. If children see high-budget parties, they often wonder why they didn’t get one, and demand the same treatment. We know it’s easier said than done but try to ignore standards set up by other parents. If you don’t have the means to throw a big-time event, that’s completely fine. There are many ways you can make a birthday party super fun for the kids without spending large amounts of money.

It’s crucial to teach your children about the importance of spending time with friends and celebrating the day of birth. Other frills such as pricey decorations and fancy food are less important in life. Besides, it can be even more fun to indulge in a DIY project and make all the decorations together.

To conclude, feel free to spend the exact amount of money you think it’s suitable for the event. Ask other parents for their opinions but decide on your own, according to what you think is best for your child. Just don’t forget to calculate the expenses of birthday gifts when you decide to set the party budget limit.

We finally got to the burning question of how many gifts do you give for your child’s birthday.  It’s a rather tricky one, we give you that. Parents all over the world are concerned with this question, and they don’t seem like they can reach consensus.

For example, when it comes to the question of How Many Gifts to Buy a Child for Christmas, most parents suggest (and stick to) the number of three or four. They relate it to Christianity and the number of gifts baby Jesus got (gold, frankincense, and myrrh). Then they opt for something that children need and want, and something to read (and wear, but the fourth one is optional).

Things are not that simple when it comes to birthdays. Without a religious background to help you out, it’s hard to conclude what is an appropriate number of gifts. However, there’s a simple logic you can follow when answering the question. There’s no such thing as “enough gifts”. If your child gets accustomed to receiving a pile of them, he/she won’t feel like getting three gifts (all of a sudden) is “enough”.

The key is to teach children that material and monetary stuff isn’t everything in the world. You can definitely do this by limiting the gifts, but you don’t have to opt for one to two gifts to do so. You should be more concerned with the meaning of the gift and always shop according to your budget. If you have some extra money to spend on your child’s gift, consider what would that mean for her/him. Buy extra gifts if you want, but stop yourself on time, and avoid overwhelming your child with presents.

Lastly, if you think a no-gift policy is the best solution, go for it. In the beginning, it might be hard to explain to your child why this year he/she won’t be getting any birthday gifts, but that won’t last for long. Your child will probably thank you later on, you only have to be brave and withstand the initial reactions!

P.S. We know it could be difficult to explain why you chose a no-gift policy, especially to other parents and family members. If you need some extra tips on the topic, take a look at the following article How to tell someone no more gifts.

How much to spend on your child’s birthday gift? That mostly depends on your budget and the limits you set. For example, it’s not that beneficial to limit the number of gifts if you choose to give one insanely expensive gift instead. You should balance the number of gifts and their price at the same time.

Now, if you opt for monetary gifts, the important question is how much money should I give for a birthday present? All we said above applies to this question too. There’s no real difference between investing in a particular gift and giving that money to the host (in monetary terms). Therefore, consider all we mentioned above when trying to answer the question.

You can also opt for alternatives. You don’t have to stick with material stuff and traditional gift-giving. Here’s what we have in mind:

We can’t stress enough how beneficial it is to opt for experiences instead of gifts. The guests can participate or not, but your child will learn much more from experiences than material stuff. We are talking about trips and holidays, and things that one can learn from by visiting new places and discovering historical facts. Of course, there are also many other experiences one can ask for, so don’t be afraid to get creative!

If you’re not sure how to do this, we got you covered with the article about How to Ask for Experiences Instead of Gifts.

You can always raise a fund for your child’s future education. It’s a smart way to invest money and allow your child to go to college he/she wants. One is certain, your child will be thankful for life, although not necessarily happy with your decision at the beginning.

Another option is to raise funds for charity. You can choose to give all the money or set a percent. It’s up to you. Another great idea is volunteering. You can organize this instead of the birthday party and get all the guests to participate. It’s a fun and educational way to spend the day and children will feel way better afterward. They’ll feel like they made a difference, however small.

As more and more parents opt for no-gift birthdays or raising money for charity, some others feel the social pressure of following the new policy. We heard a lot of parents ask:

“Is this a new rule we should all follow? Will we be bad and greedy parents if we allow for birthdays with presents? Is it true that we can only teach our children against consumerism and materialism by avoiding celebrations and gifts altogether?

There’s no simple answer to these questions. The truth is, you shouldn’t feel pressured to do anything, although it’s completely normal that you do. With so many different trends around you, it’s natural that you worry about being perceived as a bad parent if you don’t follow them. However, you should learn to let go, do only the things you’re comfortable with, and avoid trying to please others.

The things you should worry about, rather than dwell on other people’s opinions, is what is best for your child. You want to teach them not to be primarily concerned with material stuff and value other things in life more. You want to show them how important is to love, share, and help others.

Giving up on gifts isn’t the only way you can give your children a valuable life lesson. It’s one way to do it and it’s rather efficient, we give you that, but it’s not something you should stick with at any cost. What parent doesn’t enjoy seeing the flicker of surprise in children’s eyes when they see birthday gifts? If you can’t give up on that, don’t. There are other things you can do to teach your child a lesson on gift-giving and the importance of charity and helping others.

If you want to continue with the birthday celebrations and gift-giving, you can check out these alternative ideas to helping others and teaching your children to be more conscious about material and monetary presents:

Regifting New or Old Toys

The most important thing to teach kids in the age of consumerism is about the importance of giving. The recent studies about human behavior have shown that people are happier when helping and giving gifts to others than when receiving stuff. Your child will not only feel better for helping others, but he/she will actually make a difference in the world.

Therefore, talk to your child about giving up some old or new toys. For example, you can set a policy of regifting half of the newly received stuff. Your child gets to pick the things he/she likes the most and give the others away. In the end, you know that he/she won’t be truly using all received things, especially if you have a list of relatives as long as your arm. In this case, it would be contra-productive leaving your child with piles of gifts threatening to knock over all your parenting lessons.

Organizing Activities for the Guests

You can ask the guests to participate in a joined activity. They can all give away a few dollars from the budget meant for the gift and gather up money for a DIY project. Then organize a birthday activity where kids can decorate stuff and make food gift baskets to be delivered to orphanages, nursing homes, or other places. This way, they can do something creative, have fun, and also help others.

Do you find our answers and suggestions useful? We hope so! Our main goal was to answer some of the most commonly asked parents’ questions when it comes to gift-giving. We also tried to include different perspectives and approaches, because we all see things in life in different ways. That’s especially true when it comes to parenting. Therefore, we hope you were able to find answers to your questions and useful tips for your child’s upcoming birthday. Don’t forget, when answering the question of how many gifts should a child get for a birthday, try to think of what would be the optimal number for you and your child, and not about social rules and demands. Do what you think is best for your child!

a list of inexpensive and original ideas for different ages

The birthday of a loved one is a joyful holiday, especially when it comes to your own son. Every parent wants this date to be remembered by their beloved child for a long time. So, you need to pay special attention to choosing a gift for your son. Despite the abundance of options (or maybe just because of it), choosing a present can be a daunting task. Komsomolskaya Pravda shares tips and ideas on what to give your son for his birthday, and tells you what to look for when choosing a gift.

Top 25 birthday gifts for son

For a child under 7 years old

So this is a great birthday present for my son.

The main thing is to choose a model in accordance with height and age, fortunately, the assortment in stores allows.

2. The car on the remote control

Photo: pixabay.com

Any preschooler will surely be delighted with the car on the remote control and take the place of his favorite toy in his heart for a long time. Choose strong durable models - these will last for many years even after "accidents" in which the machine will inevitably fall.

3. Transformer set

Photo: pixabay.com

Transformer toys are timeless and ever popular classics. A set of such transformers will surely impress and will not gather dust on the far shelf. They will find a place both in the individual and in the collective game - the transformers will certainly be appreciated by your son's friends.

4. A backpack in the shape of a cartoon character toy

Photo: godisable-jac, pexels.com

A nice and useful gift that will surely come in handy for your son more than once - after all, you need to carry children's treasures in something. And if the backpack looks like a favorite cartoon character, then the child will use it with special pleasure.

5. Dynamic construction set

Photo: pixabay.com

The abundance of construction sets on store shelves gives great opportunities for choosing the most suitable one for your child. You can pay attention to the so-called "dynamic constructors", which allow you to build entire game mini-structures. They are interactive: such structures will have slides, tunnels, pendulums and other features that will help develop imagination and spatial thinking.

6. Kite

Photo: pixabay.com

This gift is sure to make an indelible impression on any boy. And at the same time it will become an occasion to visit the fresh air more often with the whole family. The first launch is best done under the guidance of mom or dad, who will tell you about the subtleties and nuances of kite flight.

Child 7-12 years old

7. Radio-controlled helicopter

Photo: pixabay. com

The helicopter on the control panel will not only cause genuine delight in the child (and, possibly, his dad) and will allow you to have an interesting time. He will also teach important skills of orientation and coordination in space. Do not launch a helicopter in an apartment - this is fraught with local destruction. The best go to nature and take a test flight in the "open sky".

8. Roller skates

Photo: @rodnae-productions, pixels.com

At this age, many boys dream of learning how to ride roller skates. The main thing - do not forget about protection and a helmet, it is best to give them as a set. The rollers can be taken for growth - there are models on sale with a boot that lengthens in proportion to the increase in the foot.

9. Snow scooter

Photo: @yan-krukov, pixels.com

During several winter months, a snow scooter will become your son's true friend on a walk and give him many joyful moments. And if winters in your city are often snowless, take a transforming model: such a ski can be replaced with wheels.

10. Set for chemical experiments

Photo: pixabay.com

At this age, boys actively learn about the world around them. So, a set for experiments will come in handy. Moreover, the choice of such sets on store shelves today is huge and you can easily choose the most suitable one for your son according to age and interests.

11. Colorful books

Photo: pixabay.com

Even in our digital age, the value of paper books can hardly be exaggerated. Love of reading will help to instill beautifully designed books with interesting stories. Choose modern fairy tales or adventure books - these topics are most interesting for children of primary school age.

12. Mobile phone

Photo: shutterstock.com

A mobile phone in the modern world is not a luxury, but a necessary means of communication. And also a great birthday present. You can find not the most expensive models that have all the functions necessary for a modern child: a good camera, Internet access, the ability to install your favorite applications.

Teenager 12-17 years old

13. Robot building kit

Photo: @pavel-danilyuk, pixels.com

It is not easy to please an adult child of 12-17 years old with a gift. However, a kit for constructing a real robot with your own hands can arouse sincere interest and once again draw the boy's attention to technology.

14. Gyroscooter

Photo: pixabay.com

Riding a hoverboard is not only a fun game that will surely captivate your child, but also a great exercise for coordination of movements. And such an exercise will be useful at any age.

15. Tablet

Photo: pixabay.com

The tablet will certainly come in handy for any teenager - both for studying and for playing games, reading and communicating with parents and friends. In addition to it, you can choose a case and an external battery - to protect the case and avoid unpleasant situations with a dead battery.

16. Wireless headphones

Photo: pixabay. com

A convenient functional device that will definitely come in handy for a young man at this age. There are models of "nested" headphones - they are inserted directly into the auricle. And there are “external” models - they are worn over the ears, such headphones are still comfortable to wear around the neck.

17. Bluetooth speaker

Photo: pixabay.com

All teenagers love to listen to music, and do it in the company of their peers. Perhaps that is why bluetooth speakers are so popular among them. You can be sure that such a gift will definitely please the child. And, perhaps, awaken the talent of a DJ in him.

18. Quadcopter

Photo: pixabay.com

Running a quadcopter with friends in the yard can be great fun for a group of teenagers. You can take such a device with you on trips, take photos and videos from non-standard angles - the last advantage will be appreciated by novice bloggers who are constantly looking for new interesting ways to get content.

19. Telescope

Photo: pixabay.com

A home telescope is the best gift for children who are fond of science. However, such a gift may well arouse interest in astronomy and space, and simply help to learn a lot of interesting things. And there, before the discovery of a new star, not far.

Adult

20. Modern smartphone

Photo: youtube.com

Modern smartphone of the latest model will always come in handy, because phones often break down and quickly become obsolete. Therefore, a new smartphone will not be superfluous.

21. Virtual reality glasses

Photo: @eren-li, pixels.com

Who said boys grow up? Even a grown-up son probably continues to play computer games and spend time with a game console with pleasure. So, virtual reality glasses will come in handy.

22. Wrist watch

Photo: pixabay.com

High-quality wrist watch of a popular brand is a win-win gift option. The main thing is to take into account when choosing the style of clothing that the birthday person prefers. For adherents of the classics, a watch with a strict laconic design and a leather strap is suitable. For those who are in trend - modern models with a mini-display instead of a dial.

23. Board game

Photo: pixabay.com

Board games will always come in handy in any team. So, the birthday boy will always have something to entertain guests. Options for "adult" desktops - the sea. Among them there are "party-games" - ideal for a fun company. And there are complex strategies that can take several days to complete - such games are in no way inferior in sophistication to their computer brothers.

24. A set of tools

Photo: pixabay.ru

A good set of tools will always be a great gift for a man. But it is important that the tools are really high quality. It will also be useful to know in advance which tools are already on the farm, and what is missing.

How to choose a birthday present for your son

• When choosing a gift, first of all, take into account the individual characteristics of your son - age, character, hobbies.
• It's best to ask directly what your son wants as a birthday present. Perhaps he has a specific dream that you can help fulfill.
• If your son has several desired gifts, advise him to make a wish list and send it to the guests invited to his birthday. So the chance of getting what you want will increase.

• If your son is already big and lives separately from you, before buying a gift, check if he already has something similar.
• When a child is seriously interested in something that you are not very good at, do not give him gifts related to this area - there is a great chance of making the wrong choice. Better present him with a gift card to a specialized store so that he can buy what he needs.
• Impressions will be a good gift option for any age - from a trip to an amusement park for a baby to a hang-glider flight for an adult son. There are a lot of options, the most difficult thing here is to choose.

Why it is better not to give children clothes and other practical gifts for their birthday – Moscow 24, 01/21/2022

The hero of Sergei Mikhalkov's poem "Unfulfilled Dreams" was given "sometimes a scarf, sometimes a new coat, sometimes a musical lotto". Of course, according to the boy, "it was all wrong - not what I wanted." Can a gift be not only interesting for a child, but practical and useful from the point of view of parents? The journalist, mother of two children Yevgeny Borodin, was thinking about this.

Photo: depositphotos/Vadymvdrobot

The situation when you dreamed about a bicycle or roller skates, but received a jacket or school stationery for your birthday, is familiar to many people not from books. It's annoying when parents give something without which the child would not be left anyway. Especially if in my dreams I have already dreamed up interesting, but impractical surprises. Even the most unspoiled children are waiting for a little magic on the holiday. That's right - dreams must come true.

But adults have their own rules. Sometimes parents, for various reasons, decide not to spend money on "some nonsense" and limit their choice to the necessary things. For example, they prefer to look at a pre-compiled list of expenses and time the necessary purchase to coincide with the solemn date. Of course, in this case, one can not expect much joy from the child. Who knows, maybe a grown-up son or daughter after many years will even procrastinate the topic of presents in social networks or at a psychotherapist's appointment. You will be surprised, but in the list of old children's grievances, the topic of "wrong" parental gifts, oddly enough, is in one of the first places.

Meanwhile, not everyone thinks that a useful and necessary thing bought for the holiday can cause deep resentment. Of course, when the house is a full bowl, then the issue of saving is usually not on the agenda. But psychologists and representatives of the older generation believe that much depends not only on financial capabilities, but also on family traditions. If from an early age you do not pamper children with frequent purchases, fulfilling all your whims, and do not respond to tantrums in stores, then they will begin to appreciate gifts more. Guys who didn’t know anything about refusal on ordinary days are unlikely to be happy even with the most expensive presents for a long time.

My friend once told me that in their family it was not customary to give something to each other for the New Year. Households simply exchanged congratulations. At the same time, her childhood was quite happy for herself, she loves her parents very much and it never occurred to her to reproach them for the lack of gifts over the years.

Photo: depositphotos/IgorVetushko

Practical adults at all times tried to combine business with pleasure. For example, buying clothes and shoes for a child for his birthday, but choosing better and more stylish things than those that the family usually allows itself. Such a gift will really appeal to children if they are already starting to pay attention to their appearance and understand fashion. It is only necessary to coordinate the purchase ahead of time, having clarified preferences. Of course, you should let your daughter or son choose the model and color scheme themselves.

The trendy version is usually more suitable for girls. But the boys will not mind a gift related to their hobbies or sports hobbies. A new hockey stick, wrestling shoes to replace the worn old ones, fishing rods, a hiking backpack, a soccer ball will always come in handy. It is clear that these things would have to be bought without a reason, but in this case there will be no dissatisfaction.

Do not blame yourself for the fact that sometimes you have to combine with gifts the purchase of things that are necessary for the child, but go beyond the budget. For example, spending on an electronic piano for solfeggio lessons, spending on a new sofa or desk for a child is significant for the average family, especially if there are several children. So the idea appears to enroll an expensive purchase in the category of presents.

In such cases, much depends on the parents' ability to present the most ordinary thing in a way that does not offend the child. For example, the purchase of the same sofa may coincide with the stage of growing up of the offspring, and this can be emphasized. He used to have a children's bed, and on his birthday he became the owner of his own, adult bed. Such a gift "with meaning" may seem cooler than different toys. But this is good when it comes to household personal items, and not about buying, for example, a shared wardrobe or washing machine.

Photo: depositphotos/adriaticphoto

Our eldest son was delighted with the table lamp his grandparents gave him for his birthday shortly before his very first trip to school. It would seem that it could be more prosaic - some kind of lamp. But it was his personal, "adult" thing, which he still cherishes and even considers a kind of symbol of comfort. “When we go far from home, I sometimes remember before going to bed how my lamp illuminates the desk,” my son once said in a moment of revelation.

Nevertheless, experienced mothers advise, if possible, to "dilute" practical gifts with small but pleasant surprises according to interests, so that the holiday would not be too mundane.

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