Can you give a baby

Feeding Your Newborn (for Parents)

How you feed your newborn is the first nutrition decision you make for your child. These guidelines on breastfeeding and bottle feeding can help you know what's right for you and your baby.

Breast or Bottle?

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that babies be breastfed exclusively for about the first 6 months. After they start on solid foods, babies should breastfeed through the first year of life and even beyond, if desired.

But breastfeeding isn't possible or preferable for all new moms. Deciding to breastfeed or bottle feed a baby is usually based on the mother's comfort level with breastfeeding and her lifestyle. In some cases, breastfeeding may not be recommended for a mom and her baby. If you have any questions about whether to breastfeed or formula feed, talk to your pediatrician.

Remember, your baby's nutritional and emotional needs will be met whether you choose to breastfeed or formula feed.

Benefits of Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding your newborn has many benefits. Perhaps most important, breast milk is the perfect food for a baby's digestive system. It has the nutrients that a newborn needs, and it’s easily digested. Commercial formulas try to imitate breast milk, and come close, but can't match it exactly.

Breast milk has

antibodiesthat help protect babies from many infections, including diarrhea and ear and lung infections. Breastfed babies are less likely to develop medical problems such as diabetes, high cholesterol, asthma, and allergies. Breastfeeding also might make a child less likely to become overweight.

Breastfeeding is great for moms too. It burns calories, so can help nursing moms lose the weight gained during pregnancy. Breastfeeding also may offer protection from breast cancer and ovarian cancer.

Some moms find breastfeeding easier and quicker than formula feeding — it needs no preparation, and you don't run out of breast milk in the middle of the night. Also, breastfeeding costs little. Nursing mothers do need to eat more and may want to buy nursing bras and pads, a breast pump, or other equipment. But these expenses are generally less than the cost of formula.

Breastfeeding meets a variety of emotional needs for both moms and babies. The skin-to-skin contact can enhance the emotional connection, and providing complete nourishment can help new moms feel confident in their ability to care for their newborn.

Limitations of Breastfeeding

With all the good things known about breastfeeding, why doesn't every mother choose to breastfeed?

Breastfeeding requires a big commitment from a mother. Some new moms feel tied down by the demands of a nursing newborn. Because breast milk is easily digested, breastfed babies tend to eat more often than babies who are fed formula. This means moms can be in demand as often as every 2 or 3 hours in the first few weeks. This can be tiring, but it's not long before babies feed less often and sleep longer at night.

Some new mothers need to get back to work outside the home or separate from their babies from time to time for other reasons. Some opt for formula feeding so other caregivers can give the baby a bottle. Mothers who want to continue breastfeeding can use a breast pump to collect breast milk to be given in a bottle, so their babies still get its benefits even when mom isn't there to breastfeed.

Fathers and other family members may want to share in feeding the baby. When mom is breastfeeding, dad or siblings may want to stay close by. Helping mom get comfortable, or providing a burp cloth when needed, will let them be part of the experience.

When breastfeeding is going well, other family members can help by giving the baby pumped breast milk in a bottle when mom needs a break.

Some moms may feel embarrassed or worried about breastfeeding. These feelings usually end after a successful breastfeeding process is set. It can help to get advice from those who've gone through the experience. Most hospitals and birthing centers offer in-depth instruction on breastfeeding to new moms. Your pediatrician, nurse practitioner, or nurse can answer questions or put you in touch with a lactation consultant or a breastfeeding support group.

In some cases, a mother's health may affect her ability to breastfeed. Moms getting chemotherapy for cancer and those who have HIV should not breastfeed, for example.

If you have a medical condition or take any medicines regularly, talk with your doctor about whether it's OK to breastfeed. If you have to stop nursing temporarily, continue to pump breast milk to maintain milk production. If you or your baby are sick, continue to breastfeed if you can. Talk to the doctor if you have any concerns.

In some situations, it may not possible to breastfeed, such as when a baby is very sick or born early. Mothers should talk with their baby's doctor about expressing and storing milk. Often, a baby who can't breastfeed can get breast milk through a feeding tube or bottle.

Some moms who have inverted nipples may have trouble breastfeeding, but a lactation consultant usually can help them overcome this. Likewise, women who have had plastic surgery on their breasts should be able to successfully breastfeed. Talk with your doctor if you have any concerns.

Hold off on pacifiers or bottles until your baby has gotten used to and is good at breastfeeding. Lactation professionals recommend waiting until a baby is about 3–4 weeks old before offering artificial nipples of any kind (including pacifiers).

Benefits of Formula Feeding

Commercially prepared infant formula is a nutritious alternative to breast milk. Bottle feeding can offer more freedom and flexibility for moms, and make it easier to know how much the baby is getting.

Because babies digest formula more slowly than breast milk, a baby who is getting formula may need fewer feedings than one who breastfeeds. Formula feeding also can make it easier to feed the baby in public, and lets the father and other family members help feed the baby, which can enhance bonding.

Limitations of Formula Feeding

Just as breastfeeding has its unique demands, so does bottle feeding. Bottle feeding takes organization and preparation, especially if you want to take your baby out. Store-bought formula can be pretty expensive, but do not try to make your own formula at home.

It's important to make sure that you have enough formula on hand, and bottles that are clean and ready to be used.

Here are a few guidelines for formula feeding:

Carefully follow directions on the label when preparing formula. Do not add more water than directed.
Bottles left out of the refrigerator longer than 1 hour and any formula left in the bottle that a baby doesn't finish should be discarded.
Prepared bottles of formula can be stored in the refrigerator up to 24 hours and carefully warmed just before feeding. You don't have to warm formula, but most babies prefer it.
A bottle of formula can be warmed by holding it in running warm water or setting it in a pan of warm water. A bottle of formula (or breast milk) should never be warmed in a microwave. The bottle can heat unevenly and leave "hot spots" that can burn a baby's mouth.

How Often Do Newborns Eat?

Your newborn will nurse about 8 to 12 times per day during the first weeks of life. In the beginning, mothers may want to try nursing 10–15 minutes on each breast, then adjust the time as needed.

Breastfeeding should be on demand (when your baby is hungry), which is generally every 1–3 hours. As newborns get older, they'll nurse less often and have longer stretches between feedings. Newborn babies who are getting formula will likely take about 2–3 ounces every 2–4 hours. Newborns should not go more than about 4–5 hours without feeding.

Signs that babies are hungry include:

moving their heads from side to side
opening their mouths
sticking out their tongues
placing their hands and fists to their mouths
puckering their lips as if to suck
nuzzling against their mothers' breasts
crying

A feeding schedule is not necessary — you and your baby will get into a routine. Babies know (and will let their parents know) when they're hungry and when they've had enough. Watch for signs that your baby is full (slowing down, spitting out the bottle or unlatching from breast, closing the mouth, turning away from the breast or bottle) and stop the feeding when these signs appear.

As babies grow, they begin to eat more at each feeding and can go longer between feedings. There may be other times when your infant seems hungrier than usual. Continue to nurse or feed on demand. Nursing mothers need not worry — breastfeeding stimulates milk production, and your supply of breast milk will adjust to your baby's demand for it.

Is My Newborn Getting Enough to Eat?

New parents often worry about whether their babies are getting enough to eat.

Babies are getting enough to eat if they:

seem satisfied
have about 6–8 wet diapers a day
have regular bowel movements (poops)
sleep well
are alert when awake
are gaining weight

A baby who is fussing, crying, seems hungry, does not appear satisfied after feeding, and has fewer wet diapers may not be getting enough to eat. If you're concerned that your baby isn't getting enough to eat, call your doctor.

Most infants "spit up" a small amount after eating or during burping, but a baby should not vomit after feeding. Vomiting after every feeding might be a sign of an allergy, digestive problem, or other problem that needs medical care. If you have concerns that your baby is spitting up too much, call your doctor.

Should Newborns Get Nutritional Supplements?

Breast milk has the right combination of vitamins and easily absorbed iron for newborns. A healthy infant being nursed by a healthy mother doesn't need extra vitamins or nutritional supplements, with the exception of vitamin D. Breastfed babies should begin vitamin D supplements within the first few days of life, continuing until they get enough vitamin D-fortified formula or milk (after 1 year of age).

Breastfeeding mothers who follow vegetarian diets that do not include animal products need vitamin B12 supplements.

Iron-fortified formula has the right blend of vitamins and minerals for a baby, so supplements usually aren't needed. Infants drinking less than 1 liter, or about a quart, of formula a day may need a vitamin D supplement.

Water, juice, and other foods usually aren't necessary during a baby's first 6 months. Breast milk and formula provide everything babies need nutritionally until they start eating solid foods. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions about feeding your newborn.

Reviewed by: Mary L. Gavin, MD

Date reviewed: February 2021

Feeding Your 4- to 7-Month-Old (for Parents)

Most babies this age are ready to try solid foods. Experts recommend starting solid foods when a baby is about 6 months old, depending on the baby's readiness and nutritional needs.

Be sure to check with your doctor before giving any solid foods.

Is My Baby Ready to Eat Solid Foods?

How can you tell if your baby is ready for solids? Here are a few hints:

Does your baby swallow food or push it out of their mouth? Babies have a natural tongue-thrust reflex that pushes food back out. Wait until this reflex disappears (typically when babies are 4–6 months old).
Can your baby support their own head? To eat solid food, an infant needs good head and neck control and should be able to sit up.
Is your baby interested in food? Babies who stare, reach and grab, and open their mouths for food are ready to try solid foods.

If your doctor gives the go-ahead but your baby seems frustrated or uninterested in solid foods, try waiting a few days before trying again. Breast milk and formula will still meet nutritional needs as your baby learns to eat solid foods. But after 6 months, babies need the added nutrition — like iron and zinc — that solid foods provide.

Do not add cereal or other food to your baby's bottle because it can lead to too much weight gain.

Watch for signs that your child is hungry or full. Respond to these cues and let your child stop when full. A child who is full may suck with less enthusiasm, stop, or turn away from the breast or the bottle. With solid foods, they may turn away, refuse to open their mouth, or spit the food out.

How Should I Start Feeding My Baby Solid Foods?

When your baby is ready and the doctor says it’s OK to try solid foods, pick a time of day when your baby is not tired or cranky. You want your baby to be a little hungry, but not so hungry that they’re upset. So you might want to give your baby a little breast milk or formula first.

Have your baby sit supported in your lap or in a high chair with a safety strap.

Most babies' first food is iron-fortified infant single-grain cereal mixed with breast milk or formula. Place the spoon near your baby's lips, and let the baby smell and taste it. Don't be surprised if this first spoonful is rejected. Wait a minute and try again. Most food offered to your baby at this age will end up on the baby's chin, bib, or high-chair tray. Again, this is just an introduction.

When your little one gets the hang of eating cereal off a spoon, it may be time to try single-ingredient puréed meat, vegetables, or fruit. The order in which you give them doesn't matter, but go slow. Offer foods that are high in iron and zinc — such as meat, poultry, eggs, and beans — especially if your baby is breastfeeding. Try one food at a time and wait several days before trying something else new. This will let you identify any foods that your baby may be allergic to.

Which Foods Should I Avoid?

Foods that are more likely to cause allergies can be among the foods you introduce to your baby. These include peanuts, eggs, cow’s milk, seafood, nuts, wheat, and soy. Waiting to start these foods does not prevent food allergies. Talk to your doctor if you’re concerned about food allergies, especially if any close family members have allergies, food allergies, or allergy-related conditions, like eczema or asthma.

Infants with severe eczema or egg allergies are more likely to have allergies to peanuts. Talk to your doctor about how and when to introduce these foods to your child.

Possible signs of food allergy or allergic reactions include:

rash
bloating or an increase in gassiness
diarrhea
vomiting

Get medical care right away if your baby has a more severe allergic reaction, like hives, drooling, wheezing, or trouble breathing.

If your child has any type of reaction to a food, don't offer that food again until you talk with your doctor.

Babies shouldn't have:

foods with added sugars and no-calorie sweeteners
high-sodium foods
honey, until after the first birthday. It can cause botulism in babies.
unpasteurized juice, milk, yogurt, or cheese
regular cow's milk or soy beverages before 12 months instead of breast milk or formula. It’s OK to offer pasteurized yogurt and cheese.
foods that may cause choking, such as hot dogs, raw carrots, grapes, popcorn, and nuts

Tips for Feeding Your Baby Solid Foods

With the hectic pace of family life, most parents try commercially prepared baby foods at first. They come in small, convenient containers, and manufacturers must meet strict safety and nutrition guidelines.

If you prepare your own baby foods at home, here are some things to keep in mind:

Follow the rules for food safety, including washing your hands well and often.
To preserve the nutrients in your baby's food, cook it in ways that keep the most vitamins and minerals. Try steaming or baking fruits and vegetables instead of boiling, which washes away the nutrients.
Freeze portions that you aren't going to use right away.
Whether you buy the baby food or make it yourself, texture and consistency are important. At first, babies should have finely puréed single-ingredient foods. (Just applesauce, for example, not apples and pears mixed together.)
After your baby is eating individual foods, it's OK to offer a puréed mix of two foods. As babies get older, they will learn to eat a greater variety of tastes and textures.
If you use prepared baby food in jars, spoon some of the food into a bowl to feed your baby. Do not feed your baby right from the jar — bacteria from the baby's mouth can contaminate the remaining food. If you refrigerate opened jars of baby food, it's best to throw away anything not eaten within a day or two.
Around 6 months of age is a good time for your baby to try a cup. You might need to try a few cups to find one that works for your child. Use water at first to avoid messy clean-ups. Do not give juice to infants younger than 12 months.

Over the next few months, introduce a variety of foods from all the food groups. If your baby doesn't seem to like something, don’t give up. It can take 8 to 10 tries or more before babies learn to like new foods.

Mom, myself! Why is it so important to give a child independence

Ekaterina Ushakhina

There doesn't seem to be a single parent in the world who doesn't want their child to become a little more independent. This is in theory. And in practice, we ourselves extinguish children's independence every time we try to do something for the child (yes, he is still small, he can't do it!) or decide for him (well, no, I know better how to do it right!).

And this is quite understandable: we love our children too much and subconsciously fear that they will make a mistake and harm themselves. But if we don’t step over ourselves and don’t even give children a chance to try, then we ourselves will harm them and their future.

The author of the book "Independent Children" tells how to properly develop children's independence. Here are some excerpts from the book.

Through the eyes of a child

It's time to look at the world through the eyes of your child and see what really happens to a child when he makes decisions. Start simple by learning the following three rules about your children:

1. "You are the best expert on yourself."

2. "You have a head on your shoulders."

3. "You want your life to be successful."

Independent children

If you yourself believe in these three rules, it will be much easier for you to say to your child: “You decide. I am confident that you can make informed decisions regarding your life and learn from your mistakes."

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The trick is that you can't just tell the kids this - you have to prove it. Sometimes you don't like your child's decisions, but if they don't shock you, we recommend that you leave your child alone.

It's up to you

The phrase "It's up to you" does not mean that children are given unlimited choice. In fact, it is precisely the provision of unlimited choice that is the surest way to add unnecessary stress to them. One of the reasons why permissive parenting isn't very effective is because kids get stressed out if they have to do something they're not ready for.

So what does the phrase "It's up to you" mean? Here is a simple answer: when it comes to a child’s personal life, you don’t have to decide for him what he is able to decide for himself. First, set boundaries within which you can allow your child to maneuver freely without worrying about him. Then start pushing those boundaries little by little.

If the child's decision is not too crazy, support him, even if his choice does not coincide with your desires.

Allowing your 5-year-old daughter to wear mismatches if she wants to will help her cope better in any situation in the future, including those she can't control (like when she's taking her exams or when her boyfriend dumps her) .

Whose problem is this?

The parental instinct is to protect and lead the child, usually believing that we know exactly what is best for our children. When parents come to us, concerned about lack of motivation, difficulty communicating with peers, or poor academic performance, we start with a simple question: “Whose problem is this?” The question is essentially rhetorical, but parents often answer us with a puzzled look.

Of course, it hurts you to see him offended - there is hardly anything that angers parents more than mistreatment of their child. But this is your child's problem, not yours. It is difficult to look at this issue from such an angle for many parents who want the best for their children and strive to protect them from any suffering. But the reality is this: if you want your child to feel in control of what is happening, you yourself will sometimes have to let go of the situation.

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Remember that your task is not to solve your child's problems, but to help him learn to manage his own life. This rethinking means that while we still need to guide, support, teach, help, and set limits, we need to be clear about ourselves and let the child know that his life is his life.

Authority and permissiveness

As a rule, parents think that there are two ways of education - autocracy and permissiveness. The autocratic style of upbringing is an emphasis on obedience, and permissiveness suggests that the main thing is the happiness of the child, which means that all his desires must be satisfied.

But practically all specialists in developmental psychology are in favor of the third option: education by authority . This implies support, but not control. Authoritative parents want cooperation from their children because they love and respect them and want their children to learn from their own experience. At least sixty years of research in this area confirms the fact that raising children with authority is the most effective approach.

When nurtured by authority, a child's developing brain does not expend enormous amounts of energy resisting what is in its own interest.

This approach emphasizes self-reliance and values maturity over obedience. By adhering to this style, you are sending a signal: "I will do everything in my power to help you succeed, but I am not going to force you to do something just because I think so."

Authoritative parents do not give their children complete freedom of action. They set limits and speak up when something feels wrong to them, but authoritative parents don't force a child to do anything.

Parents, relax

Do not make decisions for children. Give them the information they need and let them decide for themselves. Show them that you trust them, give them advice, and then let them go. There are many reasons to take this approach: it's good for your relationship, it teaches you how to solve problems, it encourages self-reliance, but it can actually hurt their outcome if you push.

What children believe in is self-realization. The more pressure they experience, the less RAM and motivation they have. "The more you or your mom remind me of something, the less I want to do it."

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We know it's hard. You want the best for your child, and sometimes it seems that the child will achieve what he wants if he just focuses on something or you bring him a little closer to his goal. It hurts to see him suffer or fail at something. You want to protect him and ease his path forward.

Remember, we are parents too. We understand everything. But it's a long road, and part of a parent's job is sometimes to step aside so that the kids come to you for hugs and words of encouragement, and then get back into their lives. That's where it's most important for you to be.

So stand still, don't forget to cheer, and finally remind the children that you think about them much more than about the result of some stupid test.

Based on the book "Independent Children".

Post cover: pixabay.com

10 forbidden phrases that parents still say to children - light blog

Text author: Alina Miroshnikova

our own child yells at us. And instead of the words that experts advise, I want to say those from which we ourselves cried in childhood. What are these phrases and how to get rid of them, explains psychoanalyst Marina Babushkina.

The specialist advises an experiment: imagine that you are saying the same thing to your husband (wife). Then it will be easier to reformulate the sentence as delicately as you usually address an adult whom you love and do not want to lose.

In Chukovsky's Moidodyr, the "clubfoot and crooked" Washbasin said: "Now I love you" and by this he expressed not love at all, but simply approval. So parents sometimes do not notice that the approval or disapproval of the child's actions is replaced by words about love.

Parents think that a simple “It's impossible” is not effective enough. But the threat of deprivation of love scares even the adults themselves.

What the child thinks: “Then I don't love you when you yell at me or don't buy what I want. And when you don't let me do what I want. It turns out that I often do not like you.

Check with partner : "I won't love you if you don't buy me a fur coat (you won't lose weight)".

How to replace : “You will make me happy if…”, “You will make me sad if…”

When the "inner child" of adults is offended by something, they begin to swear in the same words that they used to say in the sandbox. Parents believe that in this way the child will remember exactly what can or cannot be done.

What the child thinks : "You don't know yet how bad I can be."

We check on the partner : “Again, do you remember where you put the TV remote? You are bad".

How to replace: “You did a bad thing. You can't do that because…" Try to give the most understandable and practical explanation, then there is a better chance that the child will remember.

Children cry louder than adults. And it is physically difficult for parents to withstand this. In addition, it is also difficult for adults psychologically - because of the feeling of guilt. They believe that good moms and dads don't cry.

Adults forget at such moments that the child has the right to feel, experience, get rid of negativity so that it does not affect health. And children learn to calm down without help only with time.

What the child thinks: "Parents do not care that I feel bad."

Checking with a partner: “— I am desperate about what is happening at my work. - Don `t cry".

How to replace: “Tell me why you are crying?”, “Why are you sad/offended?” Say it, even if the reason is your prohibition or act. Add: "I'm sorry. Let me hug. I'm with you, son (daughter)."

When parents are focused on work or household chores, and a child asks for the hundredth time to explain where a cow's milk comes from, nerves can fail. The same applies to situations when you have to listen to regular disputes “I want or don’t want to go for a walk, I will go or not go.”

What the child thinks: "Nobody needs me."

Checking on a partner: “Finally we are together. "Get off, you're tired."

How to replace: "Come later". For a child, specifics are important, so add: “When the clock hands reach here” or “When the cartoon ends.”

Parents are worried about what others will think about their methods of upbringing, if the daughter looks like a little robber, and the son looks like Pierrot. Adults also say this when they are annoyed by crying or fighting and there is no time to comfort and sort it out, and reasonable arguments are over.

What the child thinks: “Are you blind, mother? I am a boy, and here I am crying.

We check on a partner: "All men are goats (women are bitches)."

How to replace: None. Just drop the stereotypes.

Adults are uncomfortable in front of the parents of children who stretch their hands to the toys of your little one, and in response they receive a look from under their brows and a squeal of “I won’t give it!”

What does the child think: “Are you my mother or this impudent one? And if he breaks or does not give back?

Checking on the partner: “My colleague came to visit us. I gave him your bathrobe and poured coffee into your favorite cup. You don't mind?"

How to replace: “What toy can you give a boy (girl) to play for a while? Will you play together? Then the boy (girl) will give you his toys.” You can also turn to the parents of another child: "Sorry, but these are his favorite toys, he does not share them." Or, "My daughter doesn't want to play together right now."

Tired parents after a busy day sometimes have only one desire: for the child to sleep. He didn’t ask for a drink, a potty, a blanket… Adults forget that it’s not always possible to influence your body. And that sleep depends on physiological processes.

What the child thinks: "Tell me how this can be done at will?"

Checking on partner: “Let's make love quickly. You have 5 minutes."

How to replace: Extra words are not needed here, just create comfortable conditions for the child to fall asleep. Speak quietly, do not raise your voice, do not get out of bed.

Adults are embarrassed in front of those who are accidentally or intentionally offended by a child. Parents feel that children need to be "trained" to apologize so that they feel guilty or ashamed. But the problem is that guilt cannot be instilled - its understanding must come from within. And shame will only make you angry.

What the child thinks: “What is this? I'm not sorry at all."

Checking with a partner: “Why are you talking to the driver of the next car like that? Ask for forgiveness immediately. "

How to replace: It's you, not the child, who should say: "Sorry, he didn't do it on purpose" or "Sorry, she's been acting bad today."

Parents try to be patient with the occasional harm the baby may cause. But when a child spills soup or breaks a glass for the tenth time, it is difficult to resist sarcastic remarks. “Paranoia” begins: what if he does it on purpose?

What the child thinks: “Oops! I really didn't mean to."

Checking on a partner: “Look what you've done, you crooked hand. And you call this a new hairstyle (borscht, nailed shelf, salary)? Are you on purpose?

How to replace: “It doesn't matter, everyone makes mistakes. Why did it happen so? Let's think about how to make it work out next time."

When five minutes are left before leaving the house without the risk of being late for work or school, and the child cannot cope with the zipper on the jacket, parents lose self-control.