When is a good time to announce your pregnancy

When Is the Best Time to Announce Pregnancy?

Medically reviewed by Deborah Weatherspoon, Ph.D., MSN — By Ashley Marcin on December 6, 2018

Announcing your pregnancy

One of the most exciting times in your pregnancy is getting that first positive test. You probably want to tell the whole world you’re expecting. But when is the best time to announce your pregnancy?

Many parents-to-be wait until the end of the first trimester — around week 13 — to tell friends and family about their pregnancy. A number of factors influence why people wait until this time to share the news.

Still, the most important part of your decision should revolve around what makes you the most comfortable. Read on to find out more about what to consider before you decide to announce your pregnancy.

The risk of miscarriage

The first trimester is a tremendous time of development and change for you and your little one. With all that change comes some risk that the pregnancy might not carry to term.

Between 10 and 25 percent of known pregnancies end in miscarriage, and roughly 80 percent of these miscarriages occur in the first trimester.

Most miscarriages are caused by factors beyond a mother’s control. About half are caused by chromosomal abnormalities. This means that the baby doesn’t develop properly.

Other causes of first trimester miscarriage include:

illness in mother
luteal phase defect (problem with a woman’s monthly cycle)
hormone imbalances
adhesions (scar-like tissue) in uterus

Age is another factor that affects miscarriage. Here is the miscarriage risk by age:

Women ages 35 and under: 15 percent
Women ages 35 to 45: 20 to 35 percent
Women ages 45 and older: 50 percent

If a developing baby lives to 7 weeks with a heartbeat, the risk of miscarriage drops to 10 percent. In those beginning weeks when the risk is highest, you may not even know you’re pregnant unless you’ve taken an early test. After week 12, the risk of miscarriage falls to 5 percent for the rest of the pregnancy.

Given these statistics, it’s understandable that many parents wait until the risk of miscarriage drops before they announce. Most women don’t want to have to tell people the sad news of a miscarriage shortly after announcing their pregnancy.

The first prenatal visit

Another reason couples wait until the end of the first trimester to share has to do with prenatal checkups. Your first appointment may be around week 8 of pregnancy, or even later.

During the first visit, your provider will run tests to confirm your pregnancy, estimate your due date, screen for infections, and determine the general health of you and your baby.

For some couples, hearing that heartbeat for the first time or having an ultrasound to date the pregnancy is reassuring before announcing it to everyone.

Recurrent pregnancy loss

If you’ve experienced a previous loss, your risk of having another miscarriage may be slightly higher, depending on your health history.

This news can be disheartening, especially in the case of recurrent pregnancy loss (RPL). Your doctor will likely examine you, order blood tests, and do some other testing to determine the cause of your losses.

The good news is that with the right treatment, your chances of carrying a baby to term may increase. But you might feel more comfortable waiting until after this treatment to announce your pregnancy to everyone.

The pros of waiting to announce your pregnancy

If you’ve had difficulty conceiving, had a previous pregnancy loss, or had a stillbirth, you may want to wait even longer than 12 weeks to share news of your pregnancy. It’s also fine to share later than the traditional first trimester cutoff. It’s entirely up to you and what you feel is best.

Though loss in the second and third trimesters is rare, couples may feel sensitive or worried that something will happen.

In these cases, you may choose to share news about the following instead:

having an ultrasound that shows the baby is healthy
finding out the sex of the baby
reaching the halfway mark of pregnancy (week 20)
reaching a personal milestone (e. g., when you start showing)

Sometimes letting a close friend or family member know can be helpful, especially if you’re feeling anxious.

If you’re still not comfortable sharing the news, your doctor may be able to refer you to a therapist or support group where you can express your feelings in a safe space.

Another option is to search online for forums with women who have gone through similar situations. Examples of online support groups include:

Pregnancy After Loss Support
Subsequent Pregnancy After Loss Support

Pros of Waiting

The risk of miscarriage usually decreases after the first trimester.
You might feel more comfortable after you’ve had an ultrasound, heard your baby’s heartbeat, or reached a pregnancy milestone.
There’s anonymity for you and your partner.

The cons of waiting to share the news

If you’d rather have a support network in place regardless of your pregnancy outcome, feel free to share the news right away.

The first trimester may be tough for some women because of fatigue, nausea, vomiting, and other unpleasant symptoms. Letting a few key people know may help ease the burden. And if you do end up miscarrying, you might not want to have to go through it alone.

You may also want to tell your employer about your pregnancy right away if your job requires you to do physical labor that might be dangerous. These hazards might include:

bending repeatedly at your waist (more than 20 times per day)
standing for long periods of time
lifting heavy things, like boxes, more than once every five minutes
being exposed to chemicals

Your job may require these tasks. The data isn’t concrete on whether or not these activities directly lead to miscarriage, but it’s still worth considering in the overall picture. Speak with your doctor about the recommendations for lifting during pregnancy for more specifics.

Cons of Waiting

The first trimester might be difficult without support.
You might be exposed to workplace hazards if you don’t tell your employer.
Friends and family might find out from other sources instead of you telling them directly.

Announcing to different groups

It might make sense to announce your pregnancy to different groups at different times. You may want to first tell a few close family members and then some friends before you announce it publicly on social media or tell your co-workers.

Family

Consider telling only your family to start. Your pregnancy will be major news for your parents, especially if this is their first grandchild. You might want to think of a creative way to tell your mother, father, and siblings so you can be there to witness their reaction firsthand.

If you choose to announce to just your family early on in your pregnancy, you’ll have plenty of people to celebrate with, but you won’t have to explain things over and over again if something does go wrong.

Friends

You’ll most likely want to tell your closest friends first. Then, whenever you feel more comfortable, you can broaden the group, or make an official announcement on social media. But be aware that the news might slip out of even the most well-meaning friend or relative.

Social networking is probably the easiest way to get the news out to friends and family who live far away. Posting a picture online of your ultrasound can get the news out in an instant.

Employer

You will have to tell your employer sooner or later, especially if you’re going to be taking parental leave or time off work. As mentioned above, it’s a good idea to tell your workplace right away if your job involves physical labor that might be dangerous.

Once your employer knows of your pregnancy, you’re protected against discrimination under the Pregnancy Discrimination Act of 1978. Your employer is required to provide you with reasonable accommodation if you’re unable to perform your work activities safely while pregnant.

If your job doesn’t involve physical labor, you can wait until you’re comfortable letting them know. Just make sure you give your employer a reasonable amount of time to prepare for your time away.

You will most likely want to tell your direct manager first so you two can plan together how to tell others you work with. It’s completely fine to ask your manager to keep this information confidential until you’re ready to tell others.

If you don’t want to inform your immediate superior right away, feel free to meet with your company’s human resources department to discuss your options. Be prepared to discuss their concerns about how your pregnancy will affect your job.

Being professional and prepared will help reassure your workplace of your commitment to making this a smooth transition.

What should you do?

In the end, the choice over when to share your pregnancy is entirely up to you. You can tell friends and family right away, or wait until you know more about the health of you and your baby.

To help make your decision, you may want to ask yourself these questions:

Do I have a high-risk pregnancy or other factors that increase my miscarriage risk?
Will telling everyone make me feel more comfortable, or less comfortable?
Do I have certain work or lifestyle factors that make telling sooner important?
Do I want a large network of support if something happens?

The takeaway

The beginning of pregnancy can be both exciting and frightening. Try to relax and enjoy the journey.

A lot of women choose to announce their pregnancy at the end of the first trimester because the risk of miscarriage is greatly reduced and their pregnancy “bump” may no longer be easy to hide. Of course, announcing at the 12-week mark isn’t required and the choice is entirely up to you.

Whether or not you tell the whole world right away, make sure to tell your doctor if you’re pregnant or trying to get pregnant. Schedule a prenatal appointment, take your vitamins, and keep up with good eating and exercise habits.

Try to take care of yourself and your baby-to-be. No matter when you share the news, it’ll surely be reason to celebrate.

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Last medically reviewed on December 6, 2018

Parenthood
Pregnancy
1st Trimester

Medically reviewed by Deborah Weatherspoon, Ph.D., MSN — By Ashley Marcin on December 6, 2018

When Is the Best Time to Announce Pregnancy?

Medically reviewed by Deborah Weatherspoon, Ph.D., MSN — By Ashley Marcin on December 6, 2018

Announcing your pregnancy

The risk of miscarriage

The first trimester is a tremendous time of development and change for you and your little one. With all that change comes some risk that the pregnancy might not carry to term.

Between 10 and 25 percent of known pregnancies end in miscarriage, and roughly 80 percent of these miscarriages occur in the first trimester.

Most miscarriages are caused by factors beyond a mother’s control. About half are caused by chromosomal abnormalities. This means that the baby doesn’t develop properly.

Other causes of first trimester miscarriage include:

illness in mother
luteal phase defect (problem with a woman’s monthly cycle)
hormone imbalances
adhesions (scar-like tissue) in uterus

Age is another factor that affects miscarriage. Here is the miscarriage risk by age:

Women ages 35 and under: 15 percent
Women ages 35 to 45: 20 to 35 percent
Women ages 45 and older: 50 percent

The first prenatal visit

Another reason couples wait until the end of the first trimester to share has to do with prenatal checkups. Your first appointment may be around week 8 of pregnancy, or even later.

During the first visit, your provider will run tests to confirm your pregnancy, estimate your due date, screen for infections, and determine the general health of you and your baby.

For some couples, hearing that heartbeat for the first time or having an ultrasound to date the pregnancy is reassuring before announcing it to everyone.

Recurrent pregnancy loss

If you’ve experienced a previous loss, your risk of having another miscarriage may be slightly higher, depending on your health history.

The pros of waiting to announce your pregnancy

Though loss in the second and third trimesters is rare, couples may feel sensitive or worried that something will happen.

In these cases, you may choose to share news about the following instead:

having an ultrasound that shows the baby is healthy
finding out the sex of the baby
reaching the halfway mark of pregnancy (week 20)
reaching a personal milestone (e.g., when you start showing)

Sometimes letting a close friend or family member know can be helpful, especially if you’re feeling anxious.

If you’re still not comfortable sharing the news, your doctor may be able to refer you to a therapist or support group where you can express your feelings in a safe space.

Another option is to search online for forums with women who have gone through similar situations. Examples of online support groups include:

Pregnancy After Loss Support
Subsequent Pregnancy After Loss Support

Pros of Waiting

The risk of miscarriage usually decreases after the first trimester.
You might feel more comfortable after you’ve had an ultrasound, heard your baby’s heartbeat, or reached a pregnancy milestone.
There’s anonymity for you and your partner.

The cons of waiting to share the news

If you’d rather have a support network in place regardless of your pregnancy outcome, feel free to share the news right away.

You may also want to tell your employer about your pregnancy right away if your job requires you to do physical labor that might be dangerous. These hazards might include:

bending repeatedly at your waist (more than 20 times per day)
standing for long periods of time
lifting heavy things, like boxes, more than once every five minutes
being exposed to chemicals

Cons of Waiting

The first trimester might be difficult without support.
You might be exposed to workplace hazards if you don’t tell your employer.
Friends and family might find out from other sources instead of you telling them directly.

Announcing to different groups

Family

Friends

Social networking is probably the easiest way to get the news out to friends and family who live far away. Posting a picture online of your ultrasound can get the news out in an instant.

Employer

Being professional and prepared will help reassure your workplace of your commitment to making this a smooth transition.

What should you do?

In the end, the choice over when to share your pregnancy is entirely up to you. You can tell friends and family right away, or wait until you know more about the health of you and your baby.

To help make your decision, you may want to ask yourself these questions:

Do I have a high-risk pregnancy or other factors that increase my miscarriage risk?
Will telling everyone make me feel more comfortable, or less comfortable?
Do I have certain work or lifestyle factors that make telling sooner important?
Do I want a large network of support if something happens?

The takeaway

The beginning of pregnancy can be both exciting and frightening. Try to relax and enjoy the journey.

Try to take care of yourself and your baby-to-be. No matter when you share the news, it’ll surely be reason to celebrate.

Share on Pinterest

Last medically reviewed on December 6, 2018

Parenthood
Pregnancy
1st Trimester

Medically reviewed by Deborah Weatherspoon, Ph.D., MSN — By Ashley Marcin on December 6, 2018

How to tell about your pregnancy at work

Elena Timofeeva

Author of articles

When and how to tell an employee about pregnancy at work - in order to work safely before the decree and just as safely return after it.

Work, maternity leave, dismissal

What exactly is the problem?

Pregnancy is not a disease, and yet talking about it at work is far from a pleasant experience for many.

Why is that? Possible reasons:

feeling of guilt - if the employee got a job relatively recently, and informally promised at the interview that she was not going to have children in the near future;
hyper-responsibility to the manager and colleagues - if the employee successfully coped with a large amount of complex work and it will be objectively difficult to find a replacement;
discrimination that women face even in international companies with a developed corporate culture - when you realize that after the announcement of pregnancy, you can no longer count on promotion, salary or participation in interesting, ambitious projects;
problems with colleagues who (reasonably) think that an additional burden will fall on them - at least until the pregnant employee leaves on maternity leave, because there are visits to the antenatal clinic, tests and toxicosis ahead;
fear of dissatisfaction with the leader - if it is intolerable.

By law, a woman is not required to report her pregnancy: the Labor Code does not establish any terms or wording. But I still have to say - in order to complete the documents on time, maintain normal working relations with the manager, colleagues and subordinates.

Wait until the end of the first trimester

There is simply no perfect moment to report pregnancy at work. But it will be more convenient and reasonable to wait until 12 weeks of pregnancy are left behind, because:

the risk of miscarriage is still high in the first trimester;
your usual, unchanging professional behavior during this period will convince even doubting colleagues and managers that you do not need "special" treatment, are able to work effectively and can still be relied on.

In most cases, it is simply not necessary to report earlier than this deadline. In the next five or six months, the manager will have enough time to find a replacement.

But there are nuances.

If you are worried about severe morning sickness, pregnancy is difficult and you need to see a doctor more often than usual, it is better to tell your manager about your situation early: this way you can agree on a more flexible schedule and other special conditions that pregnant employees are entitled to by law .

If the job involves risks to the health of your baby or future baby (e.g., increased mental or physical stress, standing for a long time, exposure to harmful chemicals), inform your manager about the pregnancy earlier and immediately ask for a formal transfer to another work.

If pregnancy becomes noticeable before 12 weeks, it is best to tell your manager the news yourself, rather than waiting for rumors to spread.

If you are afraid that your message will affect the results of the upcoming assessment, salary increase or promotion, wait for the good news to be announced before talking about the pregnancy.

If you are worried that someone at work will guess ahead of time, and this prevents you from sleeping normally and endangers the health of your child, do not postpone the conversation with your supervisor.

If your company plans to lay off employees, be sure to inform your manager about your position so that you are not included in the lists (according to the law, a pregnant woman cannot be laid off - except in cases of liquidation of the organization, article 261 of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation).

If you work in a children's or medical institution where vaccination is mandatory (pregnant women should not be vaccinated), inform the management about the pregnancy at least before the next vaccination.

Sometimes it makes sense to first confirm your professionalism and dedication to the company - and only then report the pregnancy. For example, it's worth waiting for an important deal to close or a presentation at a shareholder meeting for which you have prepared a lot of great ideas.

If you work remotely, you may not tell your manager about your situation for quite some time. But try to take into account his interests, because then you have to return to work. If you do not plan to return, the reputation of a responsible employee is also worth a lot.

How to get maternity leave if the company is liquidated?

Tell your supervisor

He has the right to be the first to know (at work)! It is he who will make your maternity leave comfortable, and your absence painless for the work process. If you first tell your colleagues and the boss finds out through third parties, then the situation will be awkward: he will have to ask the question himself.

How to report:

1. Arrange a one-on-one meeting, ask the leader for at least 15 minutes, preferably after lunch (most people are in a good mood at this time). If you work remotely, book a time for a video or audio call. If at work you communicate exclusively in chats, then it is permissible to write a personal message.

2. Say that you have great news and explain that you are expecting a baby. Immediately indicate the expected date of birth. And then give the leader the opportunity to be happy for you and congratulate you.

3. Specify when you are ready to share the news with colleagues, subordinates. If the manager does not mind, you can postpone the message to a convenient time for you.

4. Try to immediately let the manager know that you are constructive. Let us know how you feel and anything that will affect your work schedule. Share your plans for when you will approximately go on maternity leave and when you want to return from parental leave. Specify which projects you will have time to complete, which ones you will not. Express your willingness to help find a replacement for you.

If you are not ready to discuss the details of going on maternity leave, everything is in order. We can say that we have not thought about it yet. But name the date when you will tell the manager all the information he needs.

Sample text for pregnancy message :

“I am glad to inform you that I am pregnant. I found out about this recently and I want to share the news so that we have enough time to plan my maternity leave in x months. I know we have an *initiative/goal/project* on the horizon and will definitely keep working on it. In the near future I will begin to draw up regulations for the employee who will come to replace me. Naturally, I am ready to help him adapt and immerse himself in the tasks. I plan to return to work in *a period of time*.”

If a manager says something strange, thoughtless, tactless, just answer: “Well, this is really a big change, but I'm very glad!” This is a great and gentle way to push him to the idea that the appearance of a new life is good news. In addition, hearing such a response, the boss will remember the conventions and socially acceptable reaction to your news.

Share with colleagues

Of course, you don't need to organize a special meeting, but a weekly meeting in which your entire department participates is the right context for the announcement. Better if you do the talking, but make it clear that the leader is in the know.

Be brief: it is enough to state the fact, the expected date of birth of the child and the estimated date for the start of maternity leave. You can end with any appropriate joke - or just smile and say that you are ready to accept congratulations.

If there are no planning meetings in your company, be guided by accepted communication standards. You can announce by letter and put in a copy of the necessary employees. You can report in the general chat. You can tell each colleague personally - but try to do it within one day.

How to make money if you have a small child

Announce to subordinates

Again, don't gather people just to announce pregnancy. Briefly and to the point, announce the news at a general planning meeting. As for each specific subordinate, changes in his functions or duties, report individually.

Women leaders achieve high positions thanks to great diligence and passion for work. Try to prevent a situation in which you go to the hospital right from your desk, and your subordinates will be forced to redistribute tasks on the go, change the time of meetings and negotiations.

General rules

Don't apologize! Present the news as positive, changes in life and career as joyful, and the whole situation as your personal choice that does not need explanations and justifications.

Know your rights and don't give in if you are forced into voluntary care for any reason. The rights of pregnant women are regulated by the Labor Code: read in advance Chapter 41 “Peculiarities of regulating the labor of women, persons with family responsibilities”.

Immediately and without embarrassment, ask for special working conditions if you need them for health reasons.

You can't control the prejudices of others, so try not to waste your energy worrying about who will think what. But still...

. ..be professional and don't share too much personal information about your pregnancy.

If you suspect your manager is negative, first speak to an HR person and ask them to join the meeting when you break the news.

If you don't plan to return to work after your maternity leave ends, act and act like you're definitely going back until you're 100% sure you're leaving for good.

_{Illustrator: Katerina Morozova}

How to report pregnancy in an original way

Reviewer Kovtun Tatiana Anatolievna

42705 views

September 21, 2021

Have you just found out you're expecting a baby? Congratulations! In this article - a portion of inspiration and ideas on how to share the news with your loved one, parents and friends, if you have a desire to make it bright and unforgettable. And you are sure that your loved ones are ready for any surprises and will be able to support the game.

Idea #1

Kinder with surprise

It takes a little dexterity. Buy two kinder surprises for yourself and your loved one. Carefully open one package, and in order not to leave marks on the chocolate, use medical gloves. Carefully divide the chocolate egg into two halves, and instead of a toy, put a note with the cherished message: “You will become a dad!”. The halves can be connected with a hot knife: touch the chocolate edges with it and quickly connect. Eat kinders together so as not to arouse suspicion.

Idea #2

Quest for the apartment

Prepare a map of your home and mark checkpoints where you can hide candy or some cute gifts for your loved one. The final point should be a corner, in which there will be an envelope or a box with an ultrasound image.

Idea #3

Scratch cards for relatives

A postcard with a special layer that can be erased with a coin can bring good news to a future dad, grandma or grandpa. Have you seen these on lottery tickets? Here the same principle. A very delicate and neat way to start a friendly meeting or family gatherings.

Idea #4

Plate with message

Find on the Internet or make yourself a plate, at the bottom of which it will be written: "We are expecting a baby!". Disguise the inscription with a piece of cake. Indelible permanent marker or acrylic paint may work well for writing on ceramics - experiment beforehand.

Idea #5

Personalized mugs

Give your parents mugs with the inscriptions: “Grandma (name)”, “Grandfather (name)”. We are sure that tea from them will be much tastier to drink.

Idea #6

cabbage head

Here is another original way to inform parents about pregnancy. Surely you go to the store before the visit - add a head of cabbage in sliders to the usual set of products and put it in the bag as if nothing had happened.

Idea #7

During a group photo

If you often take pictures with the whole family, this method is for you. Take control of the process, and instead of the "photo" mode, quietly turn on the "video" mode and shoot without giving a look. Start the report: “One, two, and the NAME OF THE FUTURE MOTHER is pregnant!”. The video will keep the sincere emotions of your loved ones.

Idea #8

Pizza with a message

Also donuts or cakes. For this method, any food that is delivered in a box with a lid is suitable. On the inside of the lid, beautifully write the main news and wait for the box to open.

Idea #9

Gift box

A touching way to please future grandparents. Put some attribute related to your parents' hobby in a beautiful box. For example, if your mother is fond of knitting, then in the box you can put a skein of yarn and a postcard with the message: “Will you knit socks for your granddaughter?”. And if your dad is a fisherman, then the box may contain a set of tackle with a note: “Will you take your grandson fishing?”