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Loss Of Patience - Mental Help

Question:

I seem to lose my patience very quickly with everything !!! its really effecting my family and boyfriend. i am so quick to get a bad temper and i get in a mood over things that aren’t woth getting mad about . im just very easily agitated and my patience is out the window. what is wrong with me ?? sometimes i feel like i need to be on meds to keep me sane and to always be anice person i jsut feel i’m always mean , testy and ready to fly off the handle. please help ! its ruining my life !

This Disclaimer applies to the Answer Below

• Dr. Schwartz responds to questions about psychotherapy and mental health problems, from the perspective of his training in clinical psychology.
• Dr. Schwartz intends his responses to provide general educational information to the readership of this website; answers should not be understood to be specific advice intended for any particular individual(s).
• Questions submitted to this column are not guaranteed to receive responses.
• No correspondence takes place.
• No ongoing relationship of any sort (including but not limited to any form of professional relationship) is implied or offered by Dr. Schwartz to people submitting questions.
• Dr. Schwartz, Mental Help Net and CenterSite, LLC make no warranties, express or implied, about the information presented in this column. Dr. Schwartz and Mental Help Net disclaim any and all merchantability or warranty of fitness for a particular purpose or liability in connection with the use or misuse of this service.
• Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician.

Answer:

I agree that you need a consultation with a Psychiatrist in order to be evaluated for medication. The type of loss of temper you are describing could be a result of depression. Among the symptoms of depression are: agitation, sadness, anger and loss of temper, either sleeping too much or difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep, either loss of appetite or eating too much and weight gain, loss of libido or sexual desire and low self esteem. There can also be thoughts of not wanting to live and even of wishing to commit suicide. A person does not need to experience all of these symptoms to be diagnosed with depression.

There are factors that can worsen depressive symptoms such as drinking alcohol or using drugs such as marijuana. People tend to mistakenly believe that drugs and alcohol make them feel better but the reverse is usually the result.

There are different types of depression that can be affecting you and among these are Dysthymia, Major Depression or Bipolar Disorder. Depression is often accompanied by anxiety and worry.

Along with medication it is recommended that you enter psychotherapy in order that you learn how to identify and control those thoughts that cause you to experience many of the symptoms described above. The type of therapy is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

Explore Your Options Today

- Allan Schwartz, LCSW, Ph.D.

More "Ask Dr. Schwartz" View Columnists

'We can't afford to lose patience': Tedesco on the match against Atalanta in LE -

Leipzig head coach Domenico Tedesco shared his expectations for the home match against Atalanta in the quarter-finals of the Europa League.

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- Atalanta are very strong away. Her style is very intense and aggressive. We will have to wait for the right moment to attack, but also defend in time. We cannot afford to lose patience or become too "hungry." This is a two-legged confrontation,” said the German coach.

The first match between Atalanta and Leipzig will take place in Germany on Thursday, April 7, starting at 19:45 Moscow time.

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6 tips on how not to lose patience with children

Let's say it's easy to lose patience with children . Tantrums, crying, begging... you're in a hurry and your son puts on a show for you at the supermarket because he needs a toy on duty or he decides to get himself dirty from top to bottom on the worst day. At such moments, we can lose patience and do and say things that we later regret. Let's see what is 6 tricks to not lose patience with children.

Index

• 1 The Art of Patience
• 2 What happens when we lose patience with children?
• 3 6 tricks for not losing patience with children

The art of patience

This patience is an art to work on . Whether you have patience or not, your kids will blow everything up in a matter of seconds and your patience will reach its limit in many moments. Keeping patience becomes a problem and sometimes it's easy to explode and make things worse.

The task of education is not an easy task, and we have no manual to teach us what to do. Children are restless, they cannot keep up with us, they are unpredictable and easily disappointed. We also have many other responsibilities to attend to at the same time: work, home, and family.

What happens when we lose patience with children?

• When we lose patience, all we get is make things worse . We fill with tension and shout hurtful things that do a lot of damage to children's self-esteem.
• A the climate of tension is much worse than before, and the children, instead of calming down, become more tense. Not knowing how to manage tension, we become even more tense and conflicts arise.
• We teach them a bad example of impatient behavior to our children what not to do. You already know that children learn a lot by imitating.
• We do not respect the development of the child . Children are children, and they do not understand the rush or rhythm of adults. And it also worsens the relationship between parents and children, creating an atmosphere of tension and misunderstanding.

All parents want to have more patience so that they can lead their family life better and set an example of patience, so we leave you a few tricks so that you do not lose patience with children and do not lose your nerves.

6 tricks not to lose patience with children

1. How much to 10 . This is the most famous technique, and for good reason. If, instead of reacting to an emotion, we breathe and count to 10, we force the emotion to relax and it is easier for us to adequately respond . It won't take you long. As you practice, you will see that you no longer need to reach 10 to relax, you will reach it much sooner. If you want, you can go to another room for a while.
2. Dedramatizes . When we minimize things, they are not easier to manage. If we do not arrive on time, then nothing happens either, we go with children and this is understandable. We can't control everything . A sense of humor is a great tool for dedramatization.
3. This is not a private . Children are not here to annoy adults. Children are constantly doing something to know where the limits are. They will learn this in time, they will test your limits, as all children do.
4. Remember that you were also one of them . Although we easily forget it, we too were children and did the same. Think about how painful it would be if someone scolded you furiously and you didn't understand what was happening. Practice empathy and put yourself in their shoes.
5. Ask for help . Often we are burdened with a thousand responsibilities that only create stress and tension. Learn to ask for help to ease your burden and reduce stress.
6. Encourage them to express their emotions . If we scream, we suppress their emotional expression and they move away.

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