How to help neglected child

Supporting Maltreated Children: Countering the Effects of Neglect and Abuse

Contributed by:
Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D.

The most important property of humankind is the capacity to form and maintain relationships. These relationships are absolutely necessary for any of us to survive, learn, work, love, and procreate.

The ability and desire to form emotional relationships is related to the organization and functioning of specific parts of the human brain—systems that develop during infancy and the first years of life. Experiences during this early vulnerable period affect a child’s core attachment capabilities. A child’s ability to feel empathy, be caring, inhibit aggression, love, and acquire other characteristics typical of a healthy, happy, and productive person are tied to the child’s care at the beginning of life.

How Early Neglect and Abuse Affect Attachment

Impaired childhood bonding affects people differently. Severe emotional neglect in early childhood can have devastating consequences. Children without touch, stimulation, and nurturing can literally lose the capacity to form meaningful relationships. Fortunately, most children do not suffer this degree of neglect, but millions do experience some degree of impaired bonding and attachment during early childhood. Resulting problems can range from mild interpersonal discomfort to profound social and emotional problems. In general, the level of impairment is related to how early in life the emotional neglect began as well as its severity and duration.

With help, neglected children can learn to navigate normal relationships. Clinical experiences and a number of studies suggest, though, that the path to improvement is a long, difficult, and frustrating process for families and children.

How Abuse Affects Brain Development

During childhood, the human brain matures and brain-related capabilities develop in a sequential fashion. With optimal experiences, the brain develops healthy, flexible, and diverse capabilities.

Disruptions in the timing, intensity, quality, or quantity of normal development, however, can adversely affect neurodevelopment and function. Traumatic experiences trigger a state of fear-related activation in abused and neglected children’s brains. Chronic activation of the adaptive fear response can cause a persistent fear state that in turn causes hyper-vigilance, increased muscle tone, a focus on threat-related cues, anxiety, and behavioral impulsivity. These attributes are helpful during a threatening event but counter-productive when the threat has passed.

The very process of proper adaptive neural response during a threat underlies the neural pathology that causes so much distress and pain through the child’s life. The chronically traumatized child will develop a host of physical signs (altered cardiovascular regulation) and symptoms (attention, sleep, and mood problems) that make life more difficult.

There is hope. The brain is very plastic and can change in response to experiences, especially those that are repetitive and patterned.

Specific Problems in Maltreated Children with Attachment Problems

Specific problems vary depending upon the nature, intensity, duration, and timing of neglect and abuse. Some children will have profound and obvious problems; others will have very subtle problems that do not seem to relate to early life neglect. Below are some clues that experienced clinicians consider when working with maltreated children.

Developmental delays: The bond between a young child and her caregivers provides the major vehicle for physical, emotional, and cognitive development. Lack of consistent and enriched experiences in early childhood can cause delays in motor, language, social, and cognitive development.
Eating: Odd eating behaviors are common, especially in children with severe neglect and attachment problems. They will hoard and hide food, or eat as if the food will disappear any moment. They may fail to thrive, ruminate (throw up food), and have swallowing problems.
Soothing behavior: These children may use primitive and bizarre soothing behaviors, especially when stressed. They may bang their heads, rock, chant, scratch, or bite/cut themselves.
Emotional functioning: A range of emotional issues—including depression and anxiety—is common in maltreated children. Another common trait is “indiscriminate attachment,” affectionate behaviors with relatively unknown people to secure safety rather than develop an emotional bond.
Inappropriate modeling: Children model adult behavior. Maltreated children who learn that abusive behavior is the “right” way to interact with others have problems in social situations. Children who have been sexually abused are at-risk of being further victimized or perpetrating on younger children.
Aggression: Childhood aggression and cruelty often result from a lack of empathy and poor impulse control. These children really do not understand or feel what it is like for others when they do or say something hurtful.

Helping Maltreated Children

Responsive adults—parents, teachers, and other caregivers—make all the difference for children. They can:

Nurture these children. They need to be held, rocked, and cuddled. But be aware that, for many children, touch has been associated with pain, torture, or sexual abuse. Observe how your child responds to nurturing and act accordingly. In many ways, you are providing experiences that should have taken place during infancy.

Try to understand the behaviors before punishing. The more you can learn about attachment problems, bonding, and development, the more you will be able to develop useful interventions. If your child hoards food, for example, do not accuse him of stealing. A punitive approach may increase the child’s sense of insecurity and need to hoard food.

Interact with children at their emotional age. Abused and neglected children are often emotionally and socially delayed. When they are frustrated or fearful, they will regress, and as much as you want the children to “act their age,” they simply cannot. Interact at their emotional level. If they are tearful, frustrated, or overwhelmed (emotionally age two), use soothing non-verbal interactions. Hold them. Rock them. Sing quietly.

Be consistent, predictable, and repetitive. Maltreated children with attachment problems are very sensitive to new situations. Social events (parties, sleepovers, trips) can overwhelm them, even if they are pleasant. Efforts to make life consistent, predictable, and repetitive are very important. When children feel safe, they can benefit from the nurturing and enriching experiences you provide.

Model and teach appropriate social behaviors. Many abused and neglected children do not know how to interact with others. To teach them, model behaviors and narrate for the child what you are doing and why: “I am going to the sink to wash my hands before dinner because…” or “I take the soap and put it on my hands like this…. ”

You can even coach maltreated children as they play with other children. Use play-by-play: “Well, when you take that from someone, they probably feel pretty upset; so if you want them to have fun when you play this game, then you should try….” Over time, success with other children will make the child less socially awkward and aggressive.

Maltreated children can have problems modulating physical contact. They don’t know when to hug, how close to stand, when to make/break eye contact, or at what times they can wipe their nose, touch their genitals, or do grooming tasks. Do not lecture the child about “appropriate behavior;” gently suggest how she can interact differently with adults and children (“Why don’t you sit over here?”). Make lessons clear using as few words as possible, and explain in a way that will not make the child feel bad or guilty.

Listen to and talk with children. Whenever you can, sit, listen, and play with your children. When you are quiet and interactive with them, they often will begin to show and tell you what is really inside them. Practice this—slow down, quit worrying about the next task, and really relax into the moment with a child.

At these moments, teach children about their feelings. Use these principles:
(1) All feelings (sad, glad, mad, etc.) are okay to feel; (2) Children should know healthy ways to act when sad, glad, or mad; (3) Other people feel and show feelings—“How do you think Bobby feels when you push him?” (4) When you sense that the child is clearly happy, sad, or mad, ask them how they are feeling.

Have realistic expectations. Abused and neglected children have a lot to overcome. We cannot predict potential, but we do know how to measure a child’s emotional, behavioral, social, and physical strengths and weaknesses. Skilled clinicians can help to define a child’s skill areas and areas where progress will be slower.

Be patient with the child’s progress and with yourself. Progress will be slow and frustrating. Many adults, especially adoptive parents, will feel inadequate because all the love, time, and effort they exert on their child’s behalf may not seem to work. But it does. It just takes time.

Take care of yourself. Caring for maltreated children can be exhausting and demoralizing. Adults cannot provide the consistent, predictable, enriching, and nurturing care these children need if they are depleted; they must get rest and support. Respite care can be crucial for parents, who should also rely on friends, family, and community resources.

Investigate other resources. Many communities have support groups for adoptive or foster families. Professionals who specialize in attachment problems can also help. Remember, the earlier and more aggressive the interventions, the better children will be able to heal and thrive.

An Abused or Neglected Child/Teen

Home › How to Help › An Abused or Neglected Child/Teen

Child abuse includes physical, sexual, verbal or emotional abuse and neglect. Protecting children from abuse and neglect is a community responsibility. Most adults want to help but are unsure of how to get involved. Figuring out what to do can be a difficult and confusing process. If you think a child is being abused or neglected, you should report it as soon as you become aware of it. Do not wait, as time can make a difference! If an incident has happened within the last 96 hours, an immediate medical assessment may be necessary.

Recognize

It is important to know that these specific indicators may or may not be present in children who have been abused or neglected. Every child is different, and children display their feelings in many ways. Children who are experiencing emotional issues, unrelated to abuse or neglect, may display some of these same behaviors. If you have questions about your child's behavior or development, you should contact their primary care provider or pediatrician. Physicians are trained in child development, and they should be able to assist you in recognizing areas of concern.

Physical abuse is the non-accidental injury to a child. Possible signs of physical abuse are:

Physical Signs

Unexplained or repeated bruising
Unexplained burns
Other unexplained or repeated injuries

Behavioral Signs

Behavioral extremes (withdrawn, quiet, angry, and/or immature behavior)
Excessive fear of parent(s), caregiver(s) or going home
Unusual shyness or wariness of physical contact
Frequent attempts to hide injuries
Depression and/or excessive crying
Behavioral problems, truancy and/or running away
Substance abuse

Sexual abuse is any act of a sexual nature upon or with a child. Possible signs of sexual abuse are:

Physical Signs

Unexplained or frequent pain, including stomach or genital pain
Sexually transmitted diseases
Pregnancy
Bruises or bleeding from external genitals, vagina or anal region
Genital discharge
Torn, stained, or bloody underclothes
Frequent, unexplained sore throats, yeast or urinary infections

Behavioral Signs

Poor peer relationships or inability to relate to children of the same age
Behaviors not common in older children, such as thumb sucking, bedwetting, or fear of the dark
Sudden changes in behavior
Promiscuous or seductive behavior
Aggression or behavior problems
Prostitution
Substance abuse
Avoidance of recreational activity
Sleep problems or nightmares
Sudden decline in school performance
In young children, an above normal focus on theirs or others' sexual organs

Neglect is the failure to act on behalf of a child. Possible signs of neglect are:

Physical Signs

Uncleanliness, or poor hygiene, including lice, scabies, or severe or untreated diaper rash
Untreated illness or injury
Unsuitable clothing or missing key articles of clothing, such as socks, shoes or a coat
Height and weight significantly below age level

Behavioral Signs

Constant hunger, tiredness or lack of energy
Begging or collecting leftovers
Unusual school attendance (frequent absence, lateness, coming to school early or leaving late)
Assuming adult responsibilities
Vandalism or behavior problems

Environmental Signs

Lack of food, heat or utilities in the house
Lack of adult supervision
Parent or caregiver does not appear to have the knowledge or skills about how to care for a child or has their own health concerns that interfere with parenting

Emotional abuse is a pattern of behavior directed toward a child that damages their emotional well-being and self-esteem. Possible signs of emotional abuse are:

Physical Signs

Bedwetting
Frequent illness
Unexplained health problems, such as headaches, nausea or stomach pains

Behavioral Signs

Behaviors inappropriate for their age
Fear of failure, overly high standards
Mental or emotional developmental delays
Avoidance of recreational activity
Changes in mood or mood swings
Poor peer relationships or inability to relate to children of the same age
Attention-seeking behaviors

Respond and Refer

How to Report if You Suspect Abuse

In case of an emergency, or if a child indicates that they are afraid to return home, you should call local law enforcement immediately. In other cases, contact the appropriate child protective services agency, which is determined by the county in which the custodial parent(s) or guardian resides. For a directory of child protective services agencies, click here.

You should try to include the following information, although it is not required:

The name and address of the child you suspect is being abused or neglected
The age of the child
The name and address of the parent(s) or guardian
The name of the person you suspect is abusing or neglecting the child and the address, if available
The reason you suspect the child is being abused or neglected
Any other information which may be helpful to the investigation

As a follow-up to reporting, if you are a mandated reporter, you may choose to refer the child victim to a local multidisciplinary team for a child assessment. In central Ohio, contact the Child Assessment Center at The Center for Family Safety and Healing. For referrals outside of central Ohio, click here.

What happens during a child abuse and neglect investigation?

Typically, when abuse or neglect is reported, two investigations take place at the same time. The child protective services agency in the county where the parent(s) or guardian resides is responsible for making sure the child is safe. The law enforcement agency in the jurisdiction where the incident took place is responsible for determining if criminal charges will be filed. Most investigations are handled by a detective and a child protective services investigator that work together. They may also encourage that the child victim be assessed at the Child Assessment Center at The Center for Family Safety and Healing, or another child advocacy center in your area.

The child protective services investigator will talk to all family members and other individuals that the caseworker believes are important to the investigation. The investigator will likely have to visit the child's home to ensure safety. An investigation by a child protective services agency will typically take 30-45 days to complete. The caseworker, with involvement from the family, will then decide whether there is a need for continued involvement to assist the family.

Law enforcement will also interview individuals they believe may have information related to allegations. They will attempt to gather evidence that might be related to the concern. The law enforcement investigation may take longer than the child protective services investigation. The detective needs to have all of the information before making a decision about recommending charges to a prosecutor. If charges are filed, the case is transferred for further disposition to the Franklin County Prosecutor Office or Prosecutor's Office for the appropriate county.

My child has behaviors that I think are concerning for sexual abuse. How do I know if the behaviors are normal?

We encourage you to talk to your primary care provider/pediatrician. Physicians are trained in child development and should be able to assist you in recognizing areas of concern. If you have specific concerns that your child may have been abused, you may call the Child Assessment Center at The Center for Family Safety and Healing at (614) 722-3278 for further discussion. If your child is working with any behavioral health professional, please talk with them regarding your concerns.

My child's genitals look abnormal to me and I am worried there might be abuse happening. How do I know what abuse looks like? What are the physical signs of sexual abuse?

Caregivers occasionally have concerns regarding the appearance of their child's genitalia. If this is your primary concern, we encourage you to talk to your child's primary care provider/pediatrician. Rarely does an abnormal appearance indicate that a child has been sexually abused. If you have specific concerns that your child may have been abused, you can call the Child Assessment Center at The Center for Family Safety and Healing at (614) 722-3278 for further discussion.

A neglected child. Don't pass by!

News, Articles.

15/02/2018

Quarrels and squabbles torment our families,
Their seething stream is inexhaustible,
We do not forgive those vices in children,
Which we ourselves instill in them.
E. Sevrus

Mankind has rapidly entered a new era and continues its evolutionary path of development with leaps and bounds. The 21st century is accompanied by new sensational discoveries and inventions, global political, economic, social problems and events excite the minds of people.

Unfortunately, just like a hundred years ago, one of the most important problems in our society is the problem of child neglect. Often the concept of "neglected child" is associated with the concept of "homelessness", but this is not entirely true. Homelessness among children arises as a result of war, destructive natural disasters, famine, etc., that is, all those prerequisites that entail the orphanhood of children. Child homelessness is the lack of family or state care for children, the necessary conditions for the life, upbringing and proper development of the child.

There are the following signs of homelessness: the child has no family or connection with it is lost; living in places not suitable for this; use of means of subsistence unrecognized in society (theft, begging).

By definition, street children are children who have housing, but for some reason left without the necessary attention and care of adults (parents, relatives or persons replacing them), teachers and other persons who are obliged to take care of children. And also because of the unauthorized departure of the child from home or an organization that carries out activities to protect the rights of the child.

Thus, if homelessness is a social phenomenon, then homelessness is primarily a destructive parent-child relationship. Disharmony in child-parent relationships is a risk factor for children leaving the family.

The following positions that affect the relationship between parents and children are most common:

rejecting position: parents see the child as a “burden”, condemn, criticize his weaknesses, show intolerance in relations with the child;
position of evasion: this position of parents is overly restrained, indifferent, cold-blooded; communication with the child is rare and irregular; the child is left to himself;
position of dominance in relation to children: waywardness, uncompromisingness, rigidity and harsh attitude of an adult towards a child; the desire to limit needs, social freedom and independence. In other words, there is iron discipline and a strict regime in the family;
rejecting-compulsory position: parents do everything possible to adapt the child to the chosen pattern of behavior, regardless of his individual qualities and character traits. Adults impose their authoritative opinion, overestimate the requirements for the child, refuse to recognize the child's right to independence.

Memo for parents
on the prevention of unauthorized departures of children from home

Parental supervision of one's child is not an obstacle to the development of a harmonious personality and the upbringing of a person useful to society. First of all, parental supervision is the maintenance, development and preservation of the inner spiritual connection with the child. Absence, insufficient or incorrect supervision of the child can lead to serious consequences.

Start small! Try to ask your child every day what was new during the day, what was the news from school, what was good or what were the problems; tell him about your day and about what didn’t work out, but what you can be glad for.
Everything that a child considers significant may be complete nonsense for adults! Be patient and listen to him. It is from you that your children are waiting for words of support and approval.
Find time for the whole family to go to a cafe, cinema or park. Do something common. This will help you get closer to each other. Visit with your son or daughter, for example, a sports section or a gym.
Find out who your child is friends with and make friends with them. Invite guests, talk about school affairs and more.
Under no circumstances should physical measures be used! Use the right words to convey everything you want to say to the child if he is at fault.

Unauthorized departures of a child from home can have irreparable consequences when children are brought up by the street, and not by their parents. Neglected children drop out of school, start stealing, begging. Such children often become victims of crime, use drugs and alcohol, and lead an immoral lifestyle.

REMEMBER!!!

No child can overcome all difficulties without the participation, love and understanding of adults!

Publication author
Nikiforova Oksana Ivanovna, methodologist at the Crisis Center

How to help neglected children - KP.RU

Komsomolskaya Pravda

Society PRESS CENTER KPS Stavropol militia

Oksana LIKHACHEVA

January 11, 2009 1:00 am

There are 14,000 dysfunctional families on the “black list” of Kavminvody [we are discussing!]

In Russia, about two million children are beaten by their parents every year (for 10% of children this ends in death). The Caucasian Mineral Waters region, fortunately, is far from these terrible statistics. But even here, there are 14,000 dysfunctional families on the "black list". And for 1820 of them in 2008, law enforcement agencies drew up administrative protocols under Art. 5.35 of the Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation (Code of Administrative Offenses) - "non-fulfillment or improper fulfillment by parents or other legal representatives of minors' obligations to support, educate, educate, protect the rights and interests of minors" and opened 25 criminal cases. In order to once again draw public attention to the problems of neglect and violence against children and find solutions to them, Komsomolskaya Pravda and the Department of Internal Affairs for the CMS held a round table on the topic “Children without supervision: who is to blame and what to do?”

ROUND TABLE PARTICIPANTS

Sergey SHMALENKO, head of the juvenile affairs department of the Georgievsk police department, police major.

Aleksey MASKUNOV, inspector of the juvenile department of the Internal Affairs Directorate for the Mineralovodsky District, police captain.

Alexander VASILIEV, Deputy head of the department for juvenile affairs in the city of Pyatigorsk, police major.

Larisa ULYAMPERL, Inspector of the juvenile department of the Department of Internal Affairs for the city of Kislovodsk, senior lieutenant of militia.

Lidiya DELYATITSKAYA, secretary of the commission on juvenile affairs of Georgievsk.

Tatyana GANOL, head of the department of guardianship and guardianship under the administration of the city of Pyatigorsk.

Anna SUSLOVA, secretary of the commission for minors and the protection of their rights under the administration of Pyatigorsk.

Hidden violence

- There was such a case in Georgievsk. Policemen came with a check to one dysfunctional family, found a drunk woman and her 14-year-old daughter in the apartment, - said the head of the juvenile department of the Georgievsk police department, police major Sergei Shmalenko. The girl was taken to an orphanage. A couple of days later, the depressed and silent Katya betrayed - a year ago she was drunk at her mother's birthday party, and then raped. Mom advised her daughter not to worry - they say, and so she will get married. The fact that the child was taken away from the family was the right decision. It is not known what else could happen to the girl with such maternal connivance. After all, how many such latent crimes are committed in families. They are very difficult to identify: children often do not understand that they are being abused unless, for example, they are beaten. Therefore, the active help of the population is needed here. If you suddenly suspect that a neighbor's child is being abused, be sure to call the helplines. You can even go anonymous. The main thing in such a situation is to provide information in time. Although today there are not so many facts of physical violence in families. Cruelty often manifests itself not in violence, but in indifference.

In a dormitory in Georgievsk, the police raided a brothel. The mother of many children traded in drugs and did not care about her children at all. Her little son Vanya, with cerebral palsy, lies on the floor all day, and numerous guests step over the child to go to the kitchen. No, the woman did not beat her sick son. She fed, watered, dressed, but for several years Vanya had not been on the street - his mother was not going to buy a wheelchair for him. The solution to the problem turned out to be one - to deprive a woman of parental rights.

- Today, the concept of a dysfunctional family is expanding, - Sergei Shmalenko continues. - To date, in 90% of cases, criminal cases are initiated not on the fact of physical abuse of children, but because of non-compliance by parents with their direct duties. Now it often happens when in absolutely normal families, where no one drinks or rowdy, parents do not have the means to adequately raise their children. Hence increased nervousness, scandals and unreasonable aggression. According to statistics, an ordinary normal parent cannot give his child more than 20 minutes a day for education. What then to say about dysfunctional families?

Who can help?

- Everyone can help identify neglected children, - said the head of the department of guardianship and guardianship under the administration of Pyatigorsk Tatyana Ganol. - To do this, sometimes it is enough just to call and tell about what is happening at your side. Fortunately, when it comes to children, the social position of citizens is strong.

- Sometimes parents are afraid of school inspectors, - says the inspector of the juvenile department of the Department of Internal Affairs for the city of Kislovodsk, senior police lieutenant Larisa Uljamperl. - But it is the school inspector, together with the teacher, who monitors who is skipping classes, pays attention if the child's behavior has changed dramatically. When the inspector starts his day at school and constantly communicates with children, trust is born between them, and an additional lever of control appears.

- In addition to school inspectors, there are also family inspectors, - says police major Sergei Shmalenko. - The department for juvenile affairs has been forming a so-called “black list” of dysfunctional families for years. With them, constant preventive work is carried out, and such a narrow focus gives much more results - both children and their parents are re-educated. However, there is still no program in Russia that would allow to provide support to such families - to give them a chance.

- In Kislovodsk, we managed to save a baby precisely because the patronage nurse went to visit a young mother, - says Larisa Uljamperl, - and found that no one cares about the baby. At seven days, the boy with bronchitis was hospitalized, and four days later, his mother got out of the binge and took him home. But she didn’t take care of him - she fed him semolina porridge on the water. The baby developed dystrophy.

- Of course, the best social protection for a child is a family, - Lidia Delyatitskaya, secretary of the Georgievsk juvenile commission, is convinced. - You can't assign a policeman, psychologist, doctor, guardian to every child. This is what the family should do. If the family has ceased to form the personality of the child, then we can localize the consequences, but the shaft will cover us.

- It will help to solve the problem of neglect and patronage, - Tatyana Ganol is convinced. - What is 300 registered minors for Pyatigorsk when we have 34,000 children and most of them are considered normal?! What are 200 dysfunctional families for Pyatigorsk? What are two million dysfunctional families for Russia when there are so many of us? After all, it is possible to divide the entire civilian population of Pyatigorsk, take 10 families and assign one dysfunctional one to them in order to control or help everyone together. All problem solved. Ordinary leadership.

- The state should see in the family not only the taxpayer, - convinced the inspector of the juvenile department of the Internal Affairs Directorate for the Mineralovodsky district, police captain Alexei Maskunov. - There should be a well-structured family policy and additional legislative acts at the regional level, a family section in the code, so that parents know what they are responsible for administratively and criminally. In addition, the media should become even more active in promoting family values.

NOTE

Police telephone numbers to report street children

Georgievsk and Georgievsky district (87951) 3-51-23

Zheleznovodsk (87932) 32-0-55

Yessentuki (87934-07)

Kislovodsk (87937) 3-97-01

Lermontov (87935) 4-85-53

Mineralovodsky district (87922) 4-28-50

Predgorny district (87961) 2-28-54 Pyatigorny (87961) 2-28-54 8793) 33-13-19

ATC for CMS (8793) 39-06-59

ATC duty unit for CMS (8793) 97-46-70

Stavropol (8652) 26-49-10

The age category of the site 18+

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