Pregnant and clingy to husband

Pregnant and clingy to husbands is common during pregnancy. Pregnancy and childbirth can cause a woman to become a little clingy to her husband. This is normal. It’s there to protect a developing fetus.

But whether pregnancy makes a woman hates her husband is very much up for debate.

Research shows that even if a mother is married, she will feel the need to be clingy to her partner while pregnant, but that if she’s separated from her partner, she will feel less stressed and calmer.

Dr. Elizabeth Munro et al. published the most recent study on this topic in The Journal of Family Psychology (2012). This study explored how women’s emotional states during pregnancy affect their relationships with their husbands and childless partners for the first 18 months postpartum.

The results showed that women who were “clingy” during pregnancy reported being less happy and less satisfied with their relationships with husbands and childless partners, as well as being more anxious about their children’s well-being (before their child was born) than women who were not in a relationship or full-time relationship at the time of the study.

Another aspect of this study found that women who experienced Pregnant and clingy to husbands in life were speculated to experience more distress when they became pregnant, thus making them more clingy during pregnancy.

What is Pregnancy Clingy?

Pregnancy love is a foreign concept for most women. Our irrational behavior often makes us feel embarrassed, uncomfortable, or even angry. Let’s face it: We’re all unpredictable creatures, and we’re not always rational regarding intimacy.

Pregnant women are naturally attracted to their partners and are turned off if they sense they might be hurting them emotionally (i.e., being clingy). This is especially true if the feelings are unrequited and/or unwanted.

A woman isn’t only a mother when she is carrying a baby — she is also a mother when she is pregnant. Pregnancy can make us feel clingy to our partners, physically or emotionally. Our hormones are in overdrive at this time in life, and pregnancy can make us act out of impulse without thinking about the consequences. And you know what? There’s nothing wrong with that!

The Pregnant and clingy husband’s love is so different from normal love is that it usually doesn’t last once the baby arrives — which is why babies can be so hard on some moms-to-be and why many moms have been known to get so attached to their husbands that they become clingy during pregnancy.

Is it Normal to Be Clingy During Pregnancy?

You may be surprised to learn that being Pregnant and clingy to husbands is not a good sign. It can be very harmful as it makes you more dependent on your partner. This can make you feel unhappy and lonely, sometimes causing tension.

Being clingy during pregnancy is not normal. The reasons it happens vary from woman to woman, but if you are in a relationship where you feel more in love with your husband than with your significant other. He hasn’t moved on to someone else, be careful not to let him get the idea that you are “clingy” to him.

If he doesn’t want to move on, there may be some issues, and he should seek help from his doctor or therapist before getting attached.

Causes of Clinginess during Pregnancy

So, the question of whether pregnant women are more attached to their husbands is one of those things that has been bothering people – is it normal to be clingy during pregnancy? Can pregnancy make a woman hate her husband?

I have been asked these questions a lot lately. So I started to look into the subject. The first thing I did was read up on the topic.

There are so many studies on this topic that it takes quite some time to find an article or two covering the entire field. But regardless of the direction, you’re taking your research, some findings and conclusions can be reached.

Next is a paper titled “Attachment Style and Attachment Rejection During Pregnancy:

A Comparison between Women Who Are Already Pregnant and Those Who Are Not” which concluded that “women who were already pregnant had more negative attachment styles than non-pregnant women (P > .05). This finding indicates that women who are already pregnant will have more negative attachment styles because they are already emotionally connected to their partners through pregnancy. This negative attachment style will cause them to continue being clingy or attached during pregnancy despite being emotionally detached from men in general. While these results seem like contradictory information, we feel as though these scientists probably were not trying to find anything that went against your assumptions about how someone feels about her husband; however, we believe this study may be useful for further research because it supports our views regarding how pregnant women should be treated by their partners during pregnancy. There may also be some validity to other studies regarding the effect pregnancy has on the emotional closeness between partner and partner’s children.

Clinginess with Husband during Pregnancy

Clinging is an emotional problem that can affect relationships, marriage, and even children. People may also feel Pregnant and clingy to husbands during pregnancy.

When a person is clingy to her husband, she may be unable to focus on the things going on in her life. It could also mean that a woman wants to check in with her husband more often than usual during pregnancy or other childbirth-related issues.

One of the most important factors for maintaining a strong relationship is for both partners to communicate about the marriage and its challenges. In addition, being overly clingy to one’s partner has nutritional and health benefits. For instance, if you are overprotective of your partner during pregnancy, you may be harming your spouse’s health by depriving them of the foods they need for both physical and emotional health.

Is Pregnancy a Reason to Be More Attached to Your Husband?

The topic is whether pregnancy makes you more attached to your husband. One study conducted in the early 1990s by psychologist John Gottman and his colleagues suggests that a woman’s level of attachment to her husband is directly related to her satisfaction with the relationship.

However, another study published in the same journal suggests that women who were not expecting Pregnant and clingy to husbands pregnant were significantly more attached to their husbands than women who were expecting to be pregnant.

The theory that pregnancy makes a woman more attached to her husband can be found in “The Chemistry Between Men and Women: A Scientific Guide for Interpersonal Relationships” by sociologists David Buss and Robert Trivers. According to their theory, men and women spend time together during pregnancy because it makes them feel closer as they connect emotionally with a new mother-to-be.

One final point: There’s no consensus on what makes couples get along better post-pregnancy. Some researchers assert that it is the result of men having extra time on their hands after delivery, and some say it has less to do with childbirth itself but rather how well the man treats his wife after she becomes a mother.

Can Pregnancy Make a Woman Hate Her Husband?

Getting pregnant may make a woman clingy to her husband. But it isn’t just a physical phenomenon. Sudden failure of fertility can also lead to an emotional crisis.

If you’re pregnant, your relationship with your partner is no longer the same. You are preggers, and you will likely be clingy for some time to come.

But suppose you’re freaking out because you’re not in control of the situation, or because you can’t do anything about it, or because the pregnancy has been a real nightmare with all its complications and complications and complications. In that case, there is no excuse for being clingy to your partner during pregnancy.

A study published by researchers at the University of Michigan observed couples over nine months and produced data on their relationship dynamics. The researchers found that feelings of being clingy were significantly reduced in couples who were not trying to conceive but were still experiencing stress about their infertility.

How to Deal with Pregnant Women’s clingy behavior?

When you are experiencing pregnancy and clingy to husbands during pregnancy, your mind will be filled with many thoughts. So much so that it can become difficult to handle things as a couple. You need to learn how to deal with these situations as they happen and make the best out of them. Be patient and compassionate.

There are many ways to make her feel better during pregnancy, but there are also many ways for you not to feel good about yourself or your relationship. As a result, you must learn how you can deal with her clinginess to ease her way through it in the best possible way.

Pregnant women have feelings, too — feelings like joy and happiness, sadness, anger, fear, and many other emotions. They experience them differently than men do because their bodies have changed during this period of their lives; they have different levels of hormones depending on their health status (physical or emotional), their gender (male or female), and what they’re doing at that particular time in life.

Men don’t experience these emotions as easily as women do because men’s bodies react differently while pregnant and after delivery; they don’t experience hormonal changes as pregnant women do.

Pregnant and clingy to their husband, how she responds to your messages during pregnancy depends on what your message was all along — whether she was expecting something different from them! If she expected something different from you, then she will be very clingy and needy around you for some time after delivery; if not, then she might seem more carefree and non-dependent towards you for some time after delivery but will still be very clingy/nervous around her boyfriend/husband/spouse (depending on who is expecting).

This Is How Pregnancy Brings Couples Together

In This Article

Pregnancy is a process that is followed by parenting and affects both the partners in so many ways.

Ladies, you must have read in magazines and newspapers that pregnancy is a huge thing, and it changes the equations between couples. While that may be true, it’s not always a negative change.

A change in relationship dynamics is expected with the added relationship stress during pregnancy; however, pregnancy does have many positive attributes.

Even though there are many, many assumptions about how the baby becomes the priority leaving the partners with little time for each other, pregnancy can also bring a couple closer to each other.

Listed below are 8 things that corroborate how pregnancy brings couples together.

1. Responsibilities

Relationships during pregnancy go through a lot of changes, and before you know it, your responsibilities change, and you’ll be surprised to see how active your husband has become!

He, who once stayed in pajamas all day, refused to go out, is always on his feet. How can you not smile like a goof when your partner willingly takes up all the responsibilities, however tiny they might be?

Moreover, studies have even suggested that increased male involvement in pregnancy and childbirth is vital for improving the health outcomes of women with obstetric complications.

2. Bonding over the bump

Firstly, you’re gonna be extremely anxious during this whole time. It is due to the oxytocin flowing through your veins.

This hormone is what makes you feel attached to your baby. Although your husband won’t go through any of the physiological or emotional changes like you do, he will still feel vulnerable, and he’s gonna be super protective of you and your baby.

Your bonding over your baby bump will draw you guys closer.

3. Intense intimacy

Does pregnancy make you more attached to your partner? You are bound to feel a strong need for intimacy, emotional, and physical during your pregnancy.

During pregnancy, your body will experience some interesting changes, and sharing them with your partner could be a new thing for you two.

You will be awestruck by the miracle of birth, sharing your experiences with your partner will make you feel extremely close emotionally.

From dealing with insecurities during pregnancy or feeling embarrassed by all the burping, gas, and nausea, your pregnancy will make you two more connected than ever.

4. Talking about the future together

Planning the delivery of the baby, deciding on a name, getting the clothes and toys for the baby, all this may seem silly, but you both know that the world lies within these small things.

All this time, while you put your heads together to decide about the tiniest of things, you guys strengthened your bond.

Plus, those super cheesy yet lovely talks of ‘the baby has your eyes’ or ‘she/he has your pout’ will only make you guys fall in love with each other all over again.

5. Emotional support

All those hormones kicking and pushing around in your pregnant body won’t make anything easy for you. Being pregnant and unhappy in a relationship is not uncommon.

You’re likely gonna be paranoid, anxious, and even depressed. During these times, it is your partner who’s gonna be your biggest support.

Also, your partner may not tell you all his worries out loud, but he also has his fears, and this period is where both of you rely on each other and realize your love for each other!

And believe it or not, all his efforts to support you will have an impact on your newborn baby!

6.

Your alone time together

Once you have the baby, the breastfeeding, cleaning up all the mess, taking care of the baby, will eat away all of your time.

It is now when you’ll start fighting hard to give each other time. And that’s when your together-time becomes even more special, and you’ll enjoy each other’s company more than ever.

However, taking care of your wee one may leave you exhausted, and sometimes, your husband may feel neglected. So shower him with affection to show that he is still your number one guy.

Also, don’t be hard on yourself. You’ll find yourself often in a colossal mess, and that’s okay. Have faith. You guys will make it!

Also watch: Intimacy during and after pregnancy.

7. Become a stronger team

A feeling of isolation during the first few weeks of pregnancy is quite expected, as you might not have shared the news publicly when you are so early along.

Keeping your pregnancy a secret would help you avoid the overwhelming advice from friends and acquaintances. Still, it does present an opportunity for you and your partner to spend some amazing quality time.

Raising a kid is a difficult job and would require both of you to work as a team. You need to start planning how to tackle the pregnancy and become good parents.

There is so much that you would need to discuss with each other, your fears, your strengths, and even your hopes and dreams.

Pregnancy is the time where you need a teammate who can support you through the ups and downs. Before you know it, the nine months would have passed, so truly focus on growing stronger with your partner during this time.

8. Reading pregnancy/parenting books

An important part of preparing for parenting is reading articles and books on pregnancy and parenting. You might think that such books are overrated; instead, they can be very informative.

Reading the pregnancy/parenting books together is a great activity to acquire some helpful information on what to expect during the nine months and how to prepare yourself for what comes after.

Even if you both can’t find the time to read pregnancy/parenting books, you can discuss what you learned in the different books that you are reading.

This way, you both are updated with valuable information and don’t have to read the same books.

References

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3916059/https://clinicaltrials.gov/ct2/show/NCT00340028https://www.forbes.com/sites/viviennedecker/2020/01/07/best-books-to-read-during-pregnancy-and-the-first-year/#31313b5f6e23

How I gave birth to a child and immediately filed for divorce

This text was written in the Community, it retains the author's style and spelling.

Marianna Bruno

Author profile

I am 33 now, my son is 6 years old. We are from Novosibirsk.

Preparing for the decree

By the time of pregnancy, my husband and I had been in a relationship for 10 years and the topic of children seemed to be discussed up and down. Therefore, from a psychological point of view, I was ready for motherhood, with the proviso that we would share all the joys and hardships with my husband in half.

Unfortunately, I'm not used to saving money, after all the well-known events, my parents lived one day and it was not accepted in our family to make savings. Nevertheless, we had a 4-room apartment, a dacha, several cars - the rear was covered. In the husband's family, they also did not hear about airbags, but they did not disdain loans for unreasonable purposes (which I found out later).

So, we had enough for current expenses, so I was not very puzzled by the financial side (spoiler - in vain).

Life on maternity leave

Already during pregnancy, there was a shortage of money. I just got a job, after a year break in my work experience, and besides, I agreed to a gray salary. Therefore, my sick leave was cheap, and I was observed by paid doctors. Fortunately, the pregnancy proceeded without complications, but only in the third trimester I took a course of droppers (I don’t remember why). Nevertheless, when I was offered to work for a couple more weeks (up to 32) and train a girl to replace me, I agreed.

My husband's income has gone down, but he didn't want to cut his needs. Of course, when receiving the payment, I recalled the dialogue with the employer "so what if the white salary is equal to the minimum wage, are you going to retire already? Or will you give birth tomorrow?". Yes, we really don’t know if we will have a pension in 30 years, but in the case of the decree, I paid the price by agreeing to a gray salary.

Here came the most important moment of the decree for me: I had to go to pay for a separate room and a joint birth with my husband. It was he who for all 10 years insisted on his presence at the birth, on the importance of being next to me at such a moment, on dreams of being the first to take my son in my arms. All relatives, friends and even just acquaintances heard about it.

And here is the moment X: literally standing on the threshold before leaving for the maternity hospital to conclude a contract, the husband gives out the news that he has not yet decided whether he will be present at the birth or not. It was a shock to me that he nullified all ten-year conversations and promises at one moment, and then, when I no longer had a choice whether to give birth from such a person: the child would be born in any case.

For me, this really became a deep wound, because my husband seemed to be the most dear and close person, and here he "leaves" me at such a vulnerable period. I gave birth alone, all the time thinking that now I should have listened to my husband’s kind and supportive words, to hold his hand, but instead I listened to the mats of other women in labor in the general prenatal ward.

After giving birth, my husband still visited me, but when they brought the baby, he did not wait - he was in a hurry to train. He was always involved in sports (as an amateur), but the situation looked absurd: a 37-year-old man, the first long-awaited (?) child ... Already in the hospital, I decided to get a divorce and, of course, gave my son my last name.

The financial side of the decree

As I said, I had a break in my service and then a gray salary, so before giving birth I received about 30 thousand rubles and then received an allowance of about 3500 R monthly until the child was one and a half years old. I divorced my husband and through the court ordered him to pay alimony for the child and for my maintenance (until my son reaches the age of 3 years). I didn't have any benefits.

The brightest event

The brightest moment was the end of family life, for which I was not ready (of course, I was preparing for happy motherhood!). In short, the ex-husband's wording was "changed his mind, was not ready." It is impossible to know about this in advance, unfortunately, only in practice. Although, as a husband, he was always caring and very attentive, and my story turned out to be from the category of stereotypes "everything changed after the birth of a child."

Advice to future parents

I would advise myself and other women not to accept gray wages unless absolutely necessary. in this way, we deceive ourselves first of all, and on maternity leave and on sick leave, I wringed my hands more than once about this. It’s also not bad, at least in the order of delirium, to think about what will happen if I have to raise and provide for the child alone? I was definitely not mentally (and financially) ready for this, I never thought that I needed a child at all costs, to give birth for myself . .. We both wanted a child and I didn’t even allow the thought of the father’s indifference to the child, from this was much more painful.

And, of course, to have a financial cushion! To some extent, I was naive: since I grew up in a patriarchal family and the authoritarian stepfather did not use the phrases "career", "higher education" in relation to me, I saw marriage as the only true realization for a woman, then after graduation I was practically forced live with my future husband (that is, I moved from my stepfather's neck to my husband's neck). The story has always been broadcast to me that a woman will not feed herself, let alone children. Therefore, I didn’t cycle on my career, I could not work for 3-6 months.

I cannot regret marriage because I was happy, I grew up with this experience. But the beginning of real development as an adult was waiting for me only at the age of 27, after a divorce, with a baby in my arms and without the help and support of loved ones.

With the birth of my son, I learned more about my potential and now enjoy my career. I admit, from time to time it covers me with thoughts “I didn’t want to be a single mother, it’s not fair that my father can“ change his mind ”. But, in my case, this is the price of growing up, defending my moral principles and values.

Life on maternity leave. Readers tell how they became parents and give advice on how to prepare for it

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