Pregnant after 2 weeks of dating
'I Fell Pregnant With Twins After Dating My Partner for Three Weeks'
I got together with Yaw a few months after divorcing my first husband in 2015. At that time, I had known Yaw for a while as a friend, but it would never have occurred to me he was the future father of my children.
Then in August 2015, I went out for drinks with a few friends, including Yaw. It was the first night since my divorce where I felt ready to be out, single and looking. That night Yaw and I kissed, and just instantly clicked.
The moment we got together, I just knew he was "the one." Sometimes, you just know—I'd say that you just feel it with every fibre of your body. For our first official date, Yaw invited me to his nephew's wedding. Normally, this would seem like a crazy first date, but with him, it felt so natural.
My feelings for him weren't like those you might experience in your early 20s, when you innocently picture the future with the one you love before you've experienced any significant joy, or scars, from previous relationships. We were older by this point—I was 31 and Yaw was 39-years-old.
After a few days of dating, we were already talking about children and our future. But we weren't worried in any way about running out of time to have children together. We also thought that it would take months, or even years, before we "got lucky" and fell pregnant, so we left it to fate.
Then, three weeks into our relationship, I fell pregnant with twins.
I can still picture the moment I found out. I'd always imagined the moment of finding out I was pregnant to be like something from the movies—where people fall into each other's arms in tears of happiness. The real life experience wasn't quite as dramatic.
Even though we wanted children and had planned to have them, seeing two lines on the test was a huge shock, and naturally, it took us a while to get used to it. But for the next few months, our life was great.
Yaw proposed once, unofficially, on a ski gondola when we were in Slovakia visiting with my family in December 2015.
Then he officially proposed again on New Year's Day in 2016. It actually happened a few minutes after midnight and not long after we got back from the ER at the Chelsea and Westminster Hospital in London—we'd had a scare with the pregnancy—so it was quite a night.
The beginning of the pregnancy was accompanied with a lot of worries and questions about the future. Where were we going to live? How were our lives going to change, and would we still have time for one other? It was towards the end of the pregnancy that I started to feel really excited.
Dr. Ivana Poku and her husband Yaw, on their wedding day in 2016. Poku fell pregnant with twins three weeks after she began dating Yaw. IVANA POKUWe got married when I was seven months pregnant and to my own surprise, I had the energy to stay awake until the end. It wasn't easy to organise everything within such a short period of time, but it was so worth it. Our wedding day was spectacular. Not in terms of the extravagance, but because of how I felt on the day and because of our amazing friends and family.
Our boys, Mason and Henry, were born at 34 weeks via emergency cesarean section at Barnet Hospital, Royal Free London in Hertfordshire, England. The boys were perfect, but small because of the early delivery, so they spent a week or so in the Special Care Baby Unit (SCBU) .
It was a slightly worrying time, but they built up their strength and were healthy overall, so it gave us a huge boost. I thought it was going to be the beginning of the best time of my life.
But the reality was that the first weeks of motherhood soon became the worst of my life, as I began to develop signs of postnatal depression. I wouldn't wish that experience on anyone. I felt lonely, sad, regretful, and empty. I felt like a feeding and changing machine and I cried almost constantly.
That was when I realized how incredibly important it is to have the right partner beside you, especially when you become parents. If it was not for Yaw, I don't know how my story would have ended.
Ivana Poku, her husband Yaw and their twin sons, Mason and Henry.
Ivana fell pregnant with twins after three weeks of dating Yaw. Monika Jakubcinova Whenever I felt overwhelmed as a new mom, Yaw always let me feel through my emotions and helped me to understand they were normal. It was a huge relief as it significantly minimized what I was feeling at the time—which was that I was a complete failure.
He helped take care of the babies at night and on the weekends, whenever he wasn't working, and I could tell him anything that was going through my head without the slightest worry of being judged or misunderstood. Whenever I felt down, he was there for me, ready to listen and offer me comfort. Thanks to Yaw, I was able to get through the most challenging months and find the courage to seek professional help. And thanks to that help, Yaw and my family and friends, I was able to pull through my postnatal depression.
Yaw has always been incredibly supportive, and still is. Even when I started my business as a blogger and later on as a coach to help other mothers reduce their stress, he believed in me like no one else.
He is also the nicest person I've met, and thanks to him, I believe I am nicer myself.
We are a partnership, so naturally Yaw helps as much as he can with everything, from chores to looking after the boys. He is such a great father and role model to our amazing boys. We work well together as parents which gives our boys a wonderful example of unity for their future life.
We laugh together a lot too—sometimes even during arguments—which I think is very important in a relationship.
People have asked me what the "secret" is to my happy relationship. I think that humour and common values create a solid foundation for a wonderful relationship, and meeting in the right place at the right time.
Yaw and I also appreciate what we have and make the most of it, rather than focusing on flaws. Although things are not perfect—like any relationship—I could have not wished for a better person to have beside me in life, and through this unusual and surprising journey to parenthood together.
I am incredibly grateful and proud to be Yaw's wife. I know we still have a long journey ahead of us, but I know that whatever comes our way—we will deal with it together.
PhDr. Ivana Poku, lives in Hertfordshire, England and is a mom to twins, a blogger, the founder of mumsjourney.com, and motherhood coach. She set up mumsjourney after pulling through postnatal depression and has been helping moms worldwide to live joyful and stress-free lives ever since.
All views expressed in this article are the writer's own.
You and your pregnancy at 1 to 3 weeks
Your weeks of pregnancy are dated from the first day of your last period.
This means that in the first 2 weeks or so, you are not actually pregnant – your body is preparing for ovulation (releasing an egg from one of your ovaries) as usual.
Your "getting pregnant" timeline is:
- day 1: the first day of your period
- day 14 (or slightly before or after, depending how long your menstrual cycle is): you ovulate
- within 24 hours of ovulation, the egg is fertilised by sperm if you have had sex in the last few days without using contraception
- about 5 to 6 days after ovulation, the fertilised egg burrows into the lining of the womb – this is called implantation
- you're now pregnant
Find out more about trying to get pregnant.
You at 1 to 3 weeks
The first thing most women notice is that their period does not arrive.
Find out about the signs and symptoms of pregnancy
The most reliable way of finding out if you're pregnant is to take a pregnancy test.
Once you think you could be pregnant, it's important to get in touch with a midwife or doctor to start your pregnancy (antenatal) care.
You can do this by contacting:
- your GP surgery – if you're not registered with a GP, you can find a GP
- your local hospital's maternity unit – find maternity services
Things to think about
In the early days and weeks of pregnancy, you may not know if you're pregnant.
But you can do the following things:
- take a folic acid supplement of 400 micrograms a day while you're trying to get pregnant and until the 12th week of pregnancy
- take a vitamin D supplement of 10 micrograms a day
- avoid some foods to protect against infections
- stopping smoking is one of the best things you can do for your baby's health
You can get supplements from pharmacies and supermarkets, or your GP may be able to prescribe them for you.
If you want to get your vitamin D or folic acid from a multivitamin tablet, make sure the tablet does not contain vitamin A (or retinol).
You can get vitamin supplements containing folic acid and vitamin D free of charge if you're under 18, pregnant or breastfeeding and qualify for the Healthy Start scheme.
Sign up for Start4Life's weekly emails for expert advice, videos and tips on pregnancy, birth and beyond.
Go to you and your baby at 4 weeks pregnant.
Page last reviewed: 12 October 2021
Next review due: 12 October 2024
How long did you know your man when you conceived from him?
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On what day after conception the test will show pregnancy, why the test does not show pregnancy, how to determine early pregnancy - June 14, 2021
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How to detect early pregnancy? Any woman without hesitation will call a delay and two strips on the test. But everything is not so simple, especially for those who want to know about pregnancy as early as possible.
Ideally, if right the next day. Four ordinary Siberians and obstetrician-gynecologist Ekaterina Serzhantova spoke about indirect signs of pregnancy and about hormones that can give false hope.
If pregnancy is your goal, then it is quite logical that you strive to find out about it as early as possible. The obvious step is to take a test. Although the doctor Ekaterina Serzhantova warns: everything is ambiguous here, especially if you do the test before the delay.
— If the test is positive, then there is a pregnancy. And if negative, then it is not a fact that you are not pregnant. Maybe it's just too early - enough hormones have not accumulated in the urine for the test to react. There are sensitive tests that can show two stripes as early as two weeks after fertilization or even earlier, but they are not always right. nine0565
Still, many women manage to predict their pregnancy even before it is detected by ultrasound. They are sensitive to changes in sensations, and later they are convinced that they correctly interpreted the signals.
For nine months, a woman experiences a whole range of emotions and experiences a lot of new sensations. They are not always pleasant.
- There are indirect signs of pregnancy - nausea, changes in reaction to smells and taste preferences. But there is no reliable data on this matter, says Ekaterina Serzhantova, an obstetrician-gynecologist at the Pasman Clinic. nine0565
One of the causes of toxicosis is the conflict between the cells of the fetus and the mother, associated with the difference in the genetic code. By about week 12, once the placental barrier between the two organisms has formed, these sensations usually subside.
— Each of my three pregnancies began with toxicosis. It started to stir up immediately, literally in the first days. Feelings are so-so, but you can’t go wrong,” says 44-year-old Lyudmila.
Gluttony is also noted among the frequent reactions. Rare "lucky women" experience a special pregnant combo - excellent appetite and nausea to boot.
Usually such conditions do not require correction and go away on their own, but if there is a risk of dehydration due to frequent vomiting, then it makes sense to start taking medications prescribed by your doctor. nine0565
Perhaps someone becomes nimble like an electric broom, but more often women, on the contrary, begin to experience impotence.
— Feeling as if she had a cold: general weakness, she began to sleep during the day, although she had never done this before, — 34-year-old Maria recalls the beginning of her first pregnancy. At the same time, with the second child, who is about to be born, she did not experience anything similar.
Doctors advise potential mothers to undergo preconception preparation before conception (this is a complex of diagnostic, preventive and therapeutic measures to prepare the body for a full conception and bearing a healthy child). This will strengthen the body, saturate it with the necessary vitamins and minerals, compensate for chronic diseases.
Then the adaptation to the new state will be easier. nine0005
Obstetrician-gynecologist Ekaterina Serzhantova adds that there should be no fever at an early stage, pregnancy is not a disease:
— The temperature may be slightly higher than usual, but remain within the normal range, up to 37 ° C. It doesn't have to be felt.
Another indirect sign of pregnancy is a feeling of fullness… no, not life.
— I suddenly felt that my stomach was swelling. My chest also began to swell, as if someone had pumped air into me. The second time it seemed that a ball appeared in the stomach - such a space, emptiness, as in hunger. In both cases, this happened even before confirmation from the doctor, 31-year-old Alina shares the details of her pregnancies. nine0565
Ekaterina Serzhantova adds that pregnancy can be suspected very early if you start going to the toilet more often than usual. Can also worsen thrush, some other chronic processes.
The body may not give clear signals.
And it seems like there are pickles or chewing chalk does not pull, the nose has not lost its bearings: the onion smells like onions, and the rose smells like a rose, the energy is at the level, the mood is normal. But something has changed—subtly, but radically.
— There were no special sensations in the physical plane. At the same time, I began to protect my stomach, cover it with my hand, passing through the turnstile in the subway. In the crowd she began to dodge, to defend herself. If a person came too close, she could push him away. It was instinctive, I didn't know I was pregnant. And only after the fact did she realize that she had behaved like that. It was 14 years ago, but I remember it very vividly,” says 41-year-old Marina.
If you really want to know if you are pregnant or not, you can take analysis for a specific pregnancy hormone - hCG . It is possible to determine the presence of chorionic gonadotropin in the blood long before the delay in menstruation and the true reaction of the test.
The body begins to secrete hCG a few days after conception.
Ekaterina Serzhantova warns: you should not get carried away fanatically in the search for hCG. No need to run to the treatment room after every act of love. Of course, taking a few milliliters of blood will not cause physical harm. But you can suffer morally - when hCG confirms pregnancy, and then menstruation comes. nine0565
- There is a term "biochemical pregnancy". This is when ovulation happened, the egg was fertilized, but did not attach. That is, hCG began to stand out, but then the oocyte was rejected. A woman, if she does not do an analysis, usually does not know that there was a pregnancy. And that's okay, it happens. This should not cause excessive excitement and the search for non-existent problems. Then such a woman will suffer that she has had an unsuccessful pregnancy so many times. But in fact, this may not mean anything special. nine0565
As a summary, Ekaterina Serzhantova recommends first of all to pay attention to the delay in menstruation.
Menstruation did not come on time, so it's worth doing a urine test. If he did not determine pregnancy, then we take a blood test for hCG. And indirect signs of pregnancy can be misleading. It is not worth putting your hopes on them. But later, when the doctor announces the good news, you can exclaim: “I told you so!”
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