I have babies

Conceiving a baby - Better Health Channel

Most women under the age of 40 years who want to become pregnant (conceive) will achieve this within 12 months of starting to try. Here we explain how you can improve your chances of getting pregnant and having a healthy baby.

Planning for a baby

If you are planning to become pregnant, it’s important that you and your partner (if you have one) are as healthy as possible before you start trying. Your GP can help with a pre-conception health check .

A pre-conception health check usually includes:

a medical history and a general examination
blood tests to check your haemoglobin level, blood group, immunity for German measles (rubella) and chickenpox (varicella), hepatitis B and human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)
tests for any sexually transmissible infection (STI)
advice about lifestyle changes that will improve the chance of pregnancy and the health of the baby (lifestyle factors you may need to change include your weight, physical activity, alcohol consumption, recreational drug use, and whether you smoke)
advising about folate and iodine supplements before conception and during pregnancy for the health of your baby
referral to a specialist if either partner has a pre-existing medical condition that might affect the chances of pregnancy, or pregnancy health
a review of any prescription medicines either partner may be taking
referral for genetic counselling if needed
information about health services and choices of pregnancy care.

Your Fertility has some useful fact sheets about how to best prepare for pregnancy. On the Your Fertility website you can complete the Healthy Conception Tool for personalised information about what you can do to improve your pre-conception health.

Timing and conception

To conceive, you need to have sex in the five days before you ovulate, or on the day you ovulate. This is called the ‘fertile window’. When the fertile window occurs depends on the length of your menstrual cycle.
Most women know when ovulation is approaching because they notice changes in their normal vaginal discharge, which becomes clear and slippery. Learn more about the fertile window and work out when yours occurs.

Age, fertility and conception

The most important factor for the chance of getting pregnant and having a healthy baby is the woman’s age. Fertility starts to slowly decline around age 32. By age 35, the fertility decline speeds up and by age 40, fertility has fallen by half.

The effect of men’s age on fertility is less dramatic but is an important factor too. Men aged 45 and older are less fertile, and some health conditions are more common in children with older fathers.

Find out more about the effects of age on fertility and pregnancy health.

Weight, fertility and conception

Being overweight or underweight can cause hormonal changes that interfere with ovulation and reduce fertility. On average, women who are obese take longer to conceive than women in the healthy weight range and are more likely to experience infertility.

In men, obesity can lower fertility. This is likely due to a combination of factors including hormone problems, problems with erection or other health conditions linked to obesity.

Find out more about the effect of weight on fertility and pregnancy health.

Diet, exercise and conception

There is no special diet that improves the odds of conception, but a healthy range of foods that includes lots of fresh fruits, vegetables and lean meats is recommended.

Vitamins and minerals (micronutrients) are essential for the body to function. Read more about the benefits of vitamins and minerals for fertility and pregnancy health, including folate, iodine, vitamin D, zinc and selenium supplements.

Regular exercise also improves fertility. Australian and international guidelines recommend you do at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity physical activity – such as brisk walking, gardening or dancing – on most but preferably all days of the week. If possible, do some vigorous activity – such as running, fast cycling or fast swimming – every week as well.

For men and women who are overweight or obese, exercise can help to prevent further weight gain or achieve a modest weight loss that improves general health and fertility.

As part of weight management, international guidelines recommend that overweight or obese adults do 225-300 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise every week (this works out to about 35-45 minutes per day).

Tobacco, alcohol and drug use and conception

Tobacco, alcohol or recreational drug use reduces the chance of becoming pregnant. If you become pregnant and continue to smoke, drink alcohol or use recreational drugs, it can affect the health of your baby at birth and into adulthood.

Smoking and pregnancy

Smoking in pregnancy or exposure to second-hand smoke reduces fertility and increases the risk of pregnancy complications. To improve your own health and give your baby the best start in life, quit smoking before you try for a baby, and encourage your partner to do the same.

Quitting smoking can be very difficult, but there is help available. Read about the benefits of quitting and visit Quit for advice about how to kick the habit.

Alcohol and pregnancy

Alcohol can reduce both male and female fertility; even drinking lightly can reduce the likelihood of conception. In men, alcohol can impair fertility because it can cause impotence, reduce libido and affect sperm quality.

It is not clear what effect drinking small amounts of alcohol can have on unborn babies, but it is well known that high alcohol consumption can be harmful. The more alcohol consumed, the higher the risk to the unborn baby.

Binge drinking (more than six standard drinks on one occasion) can cause miscarriage, stillbirth, premature birth, small birth weight, and foetal alcohol spectrum disorder ( FASD).

If you are pregnant or planning a pregnancy, not drinking alcohol is the safest option.

Drug use and pregnancy

Prescription medication and recreational drug use can potentially affect the health of the unborn baby. If you take prescription medication, speak to your pharmacist or doctor before trying for a baby.

Having trouble conceiving?

If you haven’t conceived within 12 months, there may be a fertility problem. About one in seven couples in Australia experiences infertility.

Fertility difficulties can be due to:

female fertility problems (about 40 per cent)
male fertility problems (about 40 per cent)
both male and female fertility problems (about 10 per cent)
unknown cause (about 10 per cent).

Female fertility problems include:

problems with ovulation, including polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS)
blocked fallopian tubes
endometriosis.

Male fertility problems include:

poor sperm quality
blockage of the spermatic cord, which is the tube that transports the sperm from the testis to the penis
ejaculation disorders.

If you have trouble getting pregnant, talk with your GP who can refer you for tests to find out the cause of your problem. Find more information about causes of infertility and treatment options from the Victorian Assisted Reproductive Treatment Authority.

Where to get help

Your GP (doctor)
Jean Hailes for Women’s Health
Fertility Society of Australia and New Zealand
Healthy Male
Your Fertility
Victorian Assisted Reproductive Treatment Authority Tel. (03) 8601 5250
Direct Line – drug and alcohol counselling, information and referral service Tel. 1800 888 236
Alcohol and Drug FoundationTel: 1300 85 85 84
Women’s Alcohol and Drug Service, the Royal Women’s Hospital Tel. (03) 8345 3931
Quitline Tel. 13 78 48
Billings LIFE Tel. 1800 335 860

How long does it usually take to get pregnant?

It's impossible to say how long it takes to get pregnant because it's different for each woman.

Many factors can affect a couple's chances of conceiving, such as:

your age
your general health
your reproductive health
how often you have sex

Some women become pregnant quickly, while others take longer. This may be upsetting, but it's normal.

Fertility

Most couples will get pregnant within a year if they have regular sex and don't use contraception.

But women become less fertile as they get older.

The effect of age on men's fertility is less clear.

What does 'regular sex' mean?

Having regular sex means having sex every 2 to 3 days throughout the month.

Some couples may try to time having sex with when the woman ovulates (releases an egg).

But do not worry about the timing of when you have sex if it makes you feel stressed.

Fertility problems

Lots of factors can cause fertility problems, including:

hormonal (endocrine) disorders, such as polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) and problems with the thyroid or pituitary glands
physical disorders, such as obesity, anorexia nervosa or excessive exercise
disorders of the reproductive system, such as infections, blocked fallopian tubes, endometriosis or a low sperm count
menopause

Some of these factors affect either women or men.

The most common causes are ovulation failure (which can be caused by lots of different things) and sperm disorders.

Read more detailed information about the causes of infertility.

Getting help

If you have been trying for a baby for 1 year without success, see your GP for advice.

Further information

How can I tell when I'm ovulating?
Trying to get pregnant?
Doing a pregnancy test
Can I get pregnant just after my period has finished?
Pregnancy
Infertility
NICE guidelines: assessment and treatment for people with fertility problems

Page last reviewed: 8 September 2022
Next review due: 8 September 2025

Statuses about children are beautiful with meaning

The day begins with happiness, Happiness has risen before anyone else! Happiness smiles at mom, Turning a smile into laughter.

If God wants to compliment a woman, he gives her a daughter...
Having given a woman a son, God gives her the opportunity to try to raise a Real Man herself, capable of not only giving compliments, but also doing worthy deeds...

Children are here my meaning is the main one!
Beloved son, most glorious!
Daughter - joy and joy!
That's my whole reward

Our happiness is our children! It is better not to have them in the world,
Like butterflies fly, They fill our life with meaning!
No life without children, but boredom.
No warmth and no comfort No fun, no fire,
There is no continuation of you...

Mom's happiness in small hands, cheeks and lips as red as poppies. Mom's happiness is in the first words and in the baby's first steps...

Dear children, flowers of happiness!
Our boys and girls-daughters!
We cherish, grow, adore you,
We don’t notice how you grow up!..

Be truthful even towards a child: keep your promise, otherwise you will teach him to lie

To please his mothers and fathers, a child often has to renounce something important, including and from your dreams. But the sacrifice of parents is even greater - for the sake of their child, they are ready to give their lives.

Children are like life started all over again: First smiles, first steps, first successes, first failures. Children are experience, children are us.

I firmly believe that a child is a gift from God. This is such a valuable gift that it must be constantly loved, pampered and educated.

Having a child is wealth, being a mother is a great happiness! So I am rich and happy

Do not teach children to be rich. Teach them to be happy. When they grow up, they will know the value of things, not their price.

When there are children in the house, it can only be perfectly clean in a bowl of sweets

Children… this is happiness! Even if this happiness sometimes... twitches... the left eye...

Let there be a better mess with children at home than order without children!

Dear parents, your children would not have to lie if you accepted their truth

We give children life, and they give us its meaning.

Love your child, not your ideal idea of him, and remember: he is human!

Children immediately and naturally become accustomed to happiness, for by their very nature they are joy and happiness.

We give everything in the world to children, We give from the heart, not on loan... If only children, our children would become people, would be people!

You will never be able to create wise men if you kill naughty children.

Children are us renewed. Appearance and behavior, slightly changed.

Love your child in any way - not talented, not lucky, adults. Communicating with him - rejoice, because the child is a holiday that is still with you.

A child learns
What he sees in his house

If children see us and hear us,
We are responsible for our deeds

The character of a child is a cast from the character of the parents, he develops in response to their character.

A child is a rational being, he is well aware of the needs, difficulties and obstacles of his life.

Abandoned children often live with their parents.

Each child should be subjected to his own standard, each should be encouraged to his own duty, and rewarded with his own deserved praise. Not success, but effort deserves a reward.

The beauty of a child lies in the fact that with each child everything is renewed and the world is brought anew to the judgment of man.

The baby is the only thing in the house that has to be washed by hand.

No two children are the same - especially if one of them is yours.

Only children will help you know how much patience you have

Children should be taught what will be useful to them when they grow up.

In life, we encounter one annoying bullshit… One fine day, your child becomes an adult.

Why am I sincerely glad that I have children. 12 reasons

MARIA VORONINA

sociologist, mother of two

I recently read article "29 Reasons Why I Envy Childless People" . In the comments to her, one girl wrote that during her pregnancy she was looking for positive texts about motherhood, but nothing concrete could be found. Either complaints about life, or common words - “you must”, “children are happiness”, etc.

I understand that the author of the article on "29 Reasons" does not really regret her parenthood and wrote it in many ways as a joke, but there are too many such semi-joking materials lately. I think they can be confusing for those who are thinking about having children.

I tried to write about the good sides of motherhood from my personal experience. Not because I'm wearing a white coat, but just to have an alternative opinion available.

It's good that we now have a choice - to have children or not, and if we have, then how many. My text is addressed to those who have not yet made a decision, as well as to pregnant women who need support in their choice.

All the advantages of parenthood are described by me from a purely selfish position. What are the benefits as a mother? Nothing about duty to the motherland. I tried to write about the present, because we know nothing about the future, a glass of water in old age is not guaranteed to anyone.

It is very difficult with children. Both physically and emotionally. I'm not a perfect mom and I'm bad at a lot of things. But I would not trade motherhood for any career, any external achievement, travel and entertainment. That's why:

I love my children. This is a very strong feeling. Of course, before the birth of children, there were also people whom I loved. But love for children is completely different. She fills. Becoming a mother, I finally felt the biblical understanding of love - about acceptance, patience, forgiveness. I remember when our first baby was born, my husband said: “Imagine if all people treated each other the way we treat him. ” I know that not all parents turn on this love immediately, I also did not immediately realize it. Postpartum depression is also not uncommon, it's good that they are now talking about it and helping to overcome it. And yet, so many mothers feel an instinctive rush of boundless love for their baby (which is so nice). There is a good chance that you will be one of them!

The kids really love me. Unselfishly and unconditionally. Regardless of appearance and success. They hug their little arms and legs, stroke their cheeks with their palms: “Mom, I love you for a hundred thousand kilometers.” And there are practically no risks for mothers. Whatever the mother is, she is still the best for the child. While small, he will show his affection and adoration. Sometimes you get tired of these clinging tails, but when you remember that such a period will not last long, you immediately begin to enjoy it. And when it ends, it will be remembered.

Living with children is more fun. They laugh when they show a finger. And you laugh with them - and where to go.

Interesting with children. These are such little philosophers whose consciousness is not yet blinkered. The other day I put the baby to bed, and he says "the sun breaks up into many small stars at night, and in the morning it is going back." Beautiful, is not it?

It's great to watch a child grow and change. Even a flower on the windowsill is interesting to watch, some kind of parrot. And here, imagine, a living Homo Sapiens is growing in you, a real one! What a club, what a movie ...

Parenting is like training for personal growth. Children are like litmus paper. They instantly reveal the weaknesses of the parents, and, whether you like it or not, you have to work it out, otherwise it will be bad. In my case, this, in particular, is a complex of an excellent student and insecurity. I am learning to accept imperfections in myself and in others, to depend less on assessments, to set boundaries, to express dissatisfaction competently. I understand that there are ways to develop a personality without the participation of children, but in the first 3-4 years of parenthood I have matured more than in 15 years of a successful career with regular psychological training. And you know, life becomes easier.

The consequence of point 6 is that a new phase of my professional life is now beginning. Now I work differently.

Raising children, I understood a lot not only about myself, but also about my parents, family, people in general, about our country. It became easier to forgive people, I began to appreciate what I have more.

Thanks to the children, I met new interesting people whom I would never have met on my usual life paths.

For me, the experience of childbirth was invaluable. I know a lot of people are outraged right now. The practice of conducting childbirth in most Russian maternity hospitals is terrible, usually nothing good is expected from childbirth. But with the right approach and attitude during childbirth (and especially after them), you can get extraordinary sensations. It must be like climbing Everest. At the same time it is difficult and exciting. Now there are birth preparation courses and a lot of materials on the Internet, they really help!

I really enjoyed breastfeeding. With the first child, he had to fight for it. As in the case of childbirth, there are a lot of stupid myths about breastfeeding, harmful practices are often planted in maternity hospitals. But there are books, consultants, support groups in social networks - if it's difficult, painful, it doesn't work out - the problem is solved in most cases. But then it is such a source of happiness and support in difficult times!

The period of infancy can be really difficult, especially with the first child. But for me personally it was like this: a lot of difficult, hard and about the same amount of pleasant, cool. The baby wakes up at 5 in the morning, but at the same time he smiles at you so sincerely, rejoices with the whole body, that you are no longer very upset. And now the principle is the same (my boys are 7 years old and 4 years old). Almost all difficulties are balanced (or outweighed) by something good.

The list goes on. I learned to cook, take life easier, advanced in matters of medicine, financial literacy, learned to pick up toys from the floor with my foot (while the children were in my arms) and understand by the sound of footsteps at night which of the two is stomping towards me with their pillow and pot.

Children seem to have added a new dimension to my life. As in the rest of life, in this new dimension there are "both sorrows and joys", and scattered toys, and pockets full of chestnuts for mom as a gift. Sometimes I feel happy, sometimes unhappy. I think the choice to have children or not is not a choice between a uniquely happy or unhappy life, lonely or not lonely old age.