How to help my wife during pregnancy
Soon-to-be dads: How to help – and what not to say – during pregnancy | Your Pregnancy Matters
I may be around pregnant women all the time, but that didn’t stop me from saying some pretty bonehead things to my wife while she was pregnant. So this is my advice to dads-to-be on how to stay out of the doghouse.
As just one of many examples, I once complained about not sleeping well. This is not a smart thing to say to a pregnant woman. My lovely wife was just a few weeks from giving birth, and when she wasn’t tossing and turning to find a comfortable position for her growing belly, she was getting up constantly to go to the bathroom. I may have been tired, but it was nothing compared to what she was going through. Not to mention this earned me a night on the couch.
I had no idea what to do when we were expecting our first child. Basically, I was freaking out the whole time. I think that’s normal when you’re about to become a parent.
However, no matter how scared you are, mom is just as scared. Yes, your life is changing, but it’s not your body changing drastically and sending you on a hormonal roller coaster. Pregnancy is all about mom because, let’s be honest, they’re the ones doing the hard work. What you need to do is be supportive – in whatever way you can at that moment.
First trimester: Help her feel better
The beginning of pregnancy can be tough. Your partner likely will be exhausted and she may not feel well. Offer to run out to get her medicine – physician-approved of course. Let her know it’s OK if she throws up in front of you. If she’s uncomfortable with that, give her space when she’s sick.
Your partner may start craving weird foods. My wife ate cheese sticks, boiled eggs, and raspberries for about the first two months of her pregnancy. That’s what tasted good to her and didn’t make her sick.
If your partner feels this way, don’t ask what’s for dinner. Be an adult and cook your own food. If the smell of certain foods makes her nauseated, give it up for the time being.
If your partner wants pickles at 2 a.m., get out of bed and go get them. You were responsible for half this pregnancy, so it’s the least you can do!
Starting when you get a positive pregnancy test, show interest and be involved throughout the pregnancy. Learn as much as you can. Read the pregnancy books. Accompany her to prenatal appointments. This can be especially important if a problem develops during the pregnancy. If you are involved and at the appointments, you will better understand what’s going on and what to expect down the road.
Attend prenatal classes. This can be helpful during labor and delivery when she’s in pain and forgets some of the things she learned. You can help her remember what she can do to manage her pain and what’s coming next.
Second trimester: Pamper her
This is the honeymoon phase of pregnancy – after the first trimester sickness and before the discomfort of the third trimester. If you’re looking to get away for a few days, this is the perfect time to take her on a babymoon.
You also can help her friends and family plan a baby shower. I know you may not care about the silly games they play or the cutesy gifts. But know this: You’re going to need more diapers than exist in the world, so be grateful when you get them!
Third trimester: Make her feel comfortable
By the third trimester, your partner is going to start feeling pretty uncomfortable. Tell her to sit down and put her feet up while you make dinner, or give her a massage. If you go to a movie theater, pick a seat on the aisle near the exit so she easily can get up to go to the bathroom.
She may not feel like herself, so this is a good time to help foster her self-esteem. If she asks if she looks fat, say, “Absolutely not, you look beautiful.” Make her feel special and wanted. If she’s up for it, know that sex is almost always safe during pregnancy. Talk with your doctor, but there are very few occasions when it may not be safe.
However, she may not be in the mood. She may not feel sexy, and her growing belly can make sex uncomfortable. If she’s not into it, be understanding and don’t make her feel bad about it.
Labor and delivery: What not to say
There’s no way around it: Labor and delivery can be scary for partners. You’ve gone to the classes and read the books, but nothing can prepare you 100 percent for what’s coming. You may be nervous, but remember that it’s nothing compared to how your partner is feeling. Though you can’t take away her pain, you can stand by and support her.
In TV shows and movies, dads say dumb things to women during labor and delivery. Well, they’re not exaggerating – much. When my wife went into labor and I was driving her to the hospital, there was road construction and we kept driving over big bumps. I was so nervous and couldn’t help laughing. I thought she was going to hit me as she exclaimed, “Why is this so funny? Why are you laughing?”
Here are a few other things I’ve heard over the years that I recommend not saying to your partner while she’s giving birth to your child:
- “Gross. ” I don’t care if what you’re looking at is the most disgusting thing you’ve ever seen. Don’t say this. Ever.
- “Oh, the pain can’t be that bad.” It is. You can’t even imagine. Don’t try to empathize with her pain. Don’t try to minimize it. Just let her experience it, hold her hand, and do what she asks and needs you to do.
After the birth: Be protective and helpful
Now that your little one has arrived, every family member and friend you have will want to meet him or her. You need to be the gatekeeper. Mom likely will be tired and just want to spend time with her new baby. Don’t be afraid to tell your loved ones to come back later. Or meet them in the waiting room and entertain them out there.
It’s inevitable that you’ll forget things in the rush to go to the hospital. It’s your job to run back and forth to get a change of clothes, the phone charger, or whatever she needs.
The early days of a baby’s life are exhausting for the whole family, but try to minimize that for your partner. If she’s breastfeeding, you can’t help with middle-of-the-night feedings, but you can still be helpful. Get up and change the baby’s diaper so she can rest a few more minutes. My wife and I took shifts so we both could get some sleep.
Take as much off her plate as possible. Do the laundry, cook meals, and clean the house. If the baby is sleeping and she wants to rest, entertain your other children so she can sleep. Give her time alone. If the baby is fed and doesn’t need her, let her have a few hours of peace and quiet or a chance to get out of the house.
Don’t forget to take care of yourself as well. Find time to do something that will rejuvenate you – even if it’s just going to the gym on your way home from work.
It will take time for your family to get into a routine that works best for all of you – especially after one or both of your return to work from maternity or paternity leave. It’s easy to hunker down and just get through the first months of a baby’s life, but don’t forget to stay connected to the outside world. Maintain relationships with friends and family – and each other. Go on a date. You both need time to take a breath and maintain your sanity.
As for sex after having a baby, talk to your physician about how long you should wait. Most physicians recommend six weeks. Just remember, you can get pregnant again right away, even if your partner is breastfeeding. Don’t forget to use contraception.
Fatherhood is a big job – and it starts with taking good care of mom. Becoming a dad is scary and nerve-wracking, but also awesome. Enjoy the ride!
Here's How to Support Your Pregnant Wife
Congratulations! Your partner is pregnant, this means that your main job is to be the leader of the support team. After all, pregnancy requires you to start getting proactive. She’s sailing the ship, but you are the entire crew.
Contents
- Emotional Support
- Mental Support
- Physical Support
- A Word About Massage
- Sharing in the Excitement
- Helping with Healthcare
- Be the One Who Talks About the Baby
- Make Friends with the Belly
Fret not, it’s not as much pressure as it might sound like at first. All it takes is honing your powers of observation and intuition while capitalizing on the skills you already have. While you’re supporting your pregnant wife, you might also want to prepare yourself for fatherhood if you’re new to parenting.
Emotional Support
Let’s start with the aspect of support that gets the most press: emotional support. Those things you’ve heard about pregnant women’s mercurial mood swings? They’re 100% true. And guess what? As hard as those moods are for you to deal with, they’re just as hard for her. Don’t be a wimp in the face of raging hormones. If she needs to cry, give her a shoulder. If she watches a sad commercial and wants to talk about it how it made her feel, have a seat and take her hand. If she wants to be alone a lot, check on her in a subtle manner — behind that closed door, she might be spiraling into hormone-fueled despair. But just a smile and a few words from you can turn it all around.
Mental Support
Mental support means taking things off of her plate. Does she normally plan meals for the week? Time to step in and help with the planning (and the shopping, too). Is she the one who pays the bills? Maybe you can be in charge of making sure those rent, utility, and student loan payments get out on time. Little things like this can really mean a lot to a pregnant woman who now has more important things to worry about.
Another big aspect of mental support is helping her stay positive about the changes she’s facing, both now and in the future. Motherhood represents a giant step in her sense of identity, and as excited as she might be, she’s probably wondering sometimes whether she’s ready. Tell her how cool it is to see her growing into this role. Compliment her on her maternal glow (which is totally a real thing—you’ll see it). Remind her that she’s incredibly strong. And for God’s sake, tell her she looks beautiful.
Physical Support
Maskot/Getty ImagesAs your wife progresses in her pregnancy, ordinary life gets more difficult for her. That’s the easiest way to put it. If this is a shock to you, imagine carrying a 15 to 30-pound fanny pack around all the time, and maybe you’ll get the idea. Oh, and not only is she carrying around more and more weight by the day, but she also has tiny limbs poking into the spaces where her lungs, stomach, and bladder used to be. Literally. As they grow, babies crowd up against lots of different organs. Ever taken an elbow or heel to the face while playing backyard football? Imagine that happening inside of you. Yeah, it’s not comfortable.
This means you do more and more of the physical work around the house. Do the laundry, the dishes, the heavy lifting. Once she gets into the third trimester, she’s going to need help just getting off the couch. You might even need to adjust how you share the bed since her changing body is making it pretty hard for her to get comfortable.
A Word About Massage
As everyone will constantly remind you, once you make the announcement, your whole life changes when a baby arrives. While this is very true, it’s also true that a woman’s whole body changes during pregnancy. It changes in ways you and she never thought possible. It’s even more exhausting than going through puberty—after all, it’s all happening in just a matter of months.
Even before her baby belly starts to show, her back, legs, and hips are going to begin to ache, thanks to her body preparing for the changes to come. Late in pregnancy, walking to the mailbox is the equivalent of at least a half-marathon. Everything starts to ache and get sore.
One thing you as the partner can do to help is to give massages.
Just a ten-minute massage offers a great time to talk about each other’s days or ask how the other is feeling.
You don’t have to be a masseur, you just have to have hands. A good partner will put in a lot of time over the forty-week period rubbing and massaging their wife’s feet. It’s easy to do, and it helps to connect you to your partner through physical touch. A good rule of thumb (get it?) is that any time the two of you are sitting down together, whether to watch TV or while hanging out with friends, get those hands going. Don’t overlook the opportunity it provides for good communication, either. Just a ten-minute massage offers a great time to talk about each other’s days or ask how the other is feeling.
If you want to instantly know that you’re making a difference, start with massaging her feet, ankles, and calves. For a pregnant woman, a foot massage is the Super Bowl, the NBA Finals, a birthday party, and winning the lottery all wrapped up into one amazing, life-changing event.
In addition to foot massages, back and neck massages are right up there on the list of things that feel amazing to pregnant women. Refer once again to that 30-pound fanny pack analogy. Every day brings a new challenge in how to stand, sit, and hold her body in a way that isn’t going to hurt too much tomorrow. Add in the stress she’s going through, and you’ve got some serious tension in the neck, shoulders, and lower back.
Basically, imagine how your joints and muscles would feel after a week-long backpacking trip through the mountains. Then aim to massage those spots on her. Listen for the groans, and you’ll know you’re getting it right.
Sharing in the Excitement
Hero Images/Getty ImagesPregnant women need to feel that they’re not alone in this life-changing event. You’re supporting your partner, giving her daily massages…what else could she possibly need? Lots of things, that’s what. But she really just needs a partner. Since she’s doing all the real work, the least you can do is be there for her and share in the excitement of having a child. This means helping with planning and having a voice on various topics having to do with the baby.
Helping with Healthcare
Go with your wife to as many doctor/midwife appointments as you can. Not only will you learn some things (and save her the trouble of explaining them to you later), but you’ll understand where she’s coming from if she has concerns about her healthcare provider or procedures. This happens more often than you might think, and she’s going to need you to help her think them through. Get comfortable with the terminology, understand what her hopes and expectations are, and be ready to advocate for her if issues arise. The things you learn through being involved in her prenatal care early on will be very helpful once she goes into labor.
Be the One Who Talks About the Baby
Few things make an expectant mother prouder than being able to show off the fact that her child’s father gives a damn. You don’t have to go on for hours about the colors you’re painting the nursery during poker night, but it’s really nice for her to have someone else sub in when someone asks for the eighty-eighth time, “How’s the pregnancy going?”
You should both anticipate that female relatives and friends will get very…um, involved?…as the pregnancy progresses. Mothers and mothers-in-law, in particular, want to give advice about every aspect of childcare, from the foods she should be eating to the type of breathing she should do through contractions to the car seat you should buy. This gets overwhelming as hell for a pregnant woman. You can win major hero points by stepping into these conversations and tactfully but firmly ending them.
Make Friends with the Belly
Caiaimage/Paul Bradbury/Getty ImagesWhen your wife is pregnant, everything revolves around the belly. It’s just out there, calling the world’s attention, getting in the way of simple tasks like tying her shoes, preventing her from wearing her favorite clothes. This might shock you, but even the most excited mother-to-be sometimes feels some resentment toward this rapidly growing watermelon attached to her midsection.
You can really help with this by learning to love the belly. Touch it as it’s growing — a great approach is to hug her from behind and put your hands over it protectively. Even before the baby starts kicking, rub, and stroke her belly when you’re alone together. Tell her how beautiful it is. You can even give it kisses, or talk to the baby “through” it. You might feel silly at first, but this means so much to your pregnant partner. It reassures her that you’re not just there — you’re engaged. It might seem like a simple thing, but it’s important and she will love you for it.
As the partner of a pregnant woman, it really doesn’t take much to be a hero. Just amplify the best skills and traits that you bring to your relationship, keep your eyes and ears open, and remember that the better you look after her, the better she can look after your new best friend.
And now that Junior is on his way, maybe instead of throwing a baby shower, you should opt for a “Dadchelor Party” instead.
Editors' Recommendations
- Self-Care for Men: A Complete Guide to Feeling Your Absolute Best
- 7 Things New Dads Wish They Knew Before the Baby Came
- Male Fertility FAQs and Advice: How to Keep Your Swimmers Strong
- Size Matters, Which is Why MyOne Condoms Has Your Perfect Fit
A pregnant wife: instructions for her husband
During pregnancy, new processes begin to occur in a woman's body, often incomprehensible to both spouses.
Emotions, appetite, dizziness, changes in bodily sensations... Of course, all this affects relationships in the family. Husbands experience extreme stress and often do not know what to do - as if their wife had been replaced.
Of course, much in a relationship during pregnancy depends on how desirable the unborn child is. And on how the couple knows how to express their love for each other.
Communication with a pregnant wife requires special understanding, patience, and knowledge of the situation. To facilitate communication, we offer the husband some tips to help him get through this difficult period without loss.
Try to understand what cannot be experienced by yourself
It is not physically possible for a man to feel what is happening to a woman. Talk to your wife about things that she feels are bothering her. This will allow you to understand it better. Yes, you do not feel the same, but you are actively involved, you are there. You are one hundred percent in the process. A man can simply sympathize and provide comfort. Knowing that a husband is worried about his wife is very important. This will give her strength and calmness.
Take on more household chores
Listen to your wife's wishes. Any. Household or even requests for small things. Take out the trash, hang up laundry after washing, take over the washing of dishes or finally install a dishwasher. Any help is important, this is a real manifestation of care and love. Even if you were brought up with the understanding that there are “male” and “female” jobs in the house, you will have to break the stereotype. Take into account that such times are already in the past, when women did not work, but took care of the house. In a modern society, where both men and women work equally, it is also customary to share responsibilities, and even more so in such a difficult period for a woman.
Take care of your wife and fulfill all her "whims"
It may seem to you that your wife has turned into a terrible shrew and asks for the impossible. This is not so, in the body of a woman during this period, hormones made a real mess, hence the strange behavior, habits, requests. Believe me, your wife does not mock you. And if she wanted peaches in the middle of the night in winter, then run headlong through all the supermarkets in search of what she wants. All the same, she will not let you fall asleep and will throw a tantrum. Because it is very important for her, no matter how strange her request may seem to you. It is likely that she herself will then be surprised by her behavior.
If she asks you not to wear cologne, hide it away. Does she no longer like your beard? Shave without regrets. If she does not want intimacy, then she will have to put up with it. Not always women experience pleasant sensations from sex during pregnancy. Do not rush her, be affectionate and gentle and she herself will seduce you if she wants to.
A woman's legs get very tired during pregnancy. Still, the weight is growing, the blood vessels of the legs are compressed under the weight of the fetus, and the ankles are also swollen. Give her a foot massage with lavender and peppermint oils before bed. This will relieve tension before going to bed and relax a woman. Your wife will be grateful to you. Offer to help with everything, even if you need to shampoo and blow dry your hair.
Trust your wife and don't give too much advice
Often men give advice to their wife that they once heard from their mother. When showing concern about the state of pregnancy, it is important for a husband to use any information in moderation. Even doctor's advice may not always be appropriate. Believe me, a woman feels better what exactly she needs at this particular moment - women's instincts are perfectly developed. And the information from your mother may no longer be relevant, even worse, it will irritate your wife. It is better to read the popular modern literature on this topic yourself and invite her to discuss the book together.
"Filter" the environment and external information
Try to protect your wife from negativity during this period. These can be people who are unpleasant to her (even from among relatives), violent films and programs, discussions of unsuccessful pregnancy and childbirth on Internet forums.
A woman is too receptive at this time and can think up a lot of unnecessary things, and people unpleasant to her will cause her stress. Better bring her more good videos about children, animals and happy love. Come up with reasons for her why she can't go to the birthday party of a cousin she can't stand
cannot.
A woman is now like a fragile vase, fill it only with soft toys and sweets and make sure that needles do not accidentally fall into it.
Maintain love, make efforts
After a certain period of time - usually from a year to three - the feeling of love sharply declines. Even the wife's pregnancy does not save. Therefore, a man's initiative is needed. Support love with your actions. It is important to understand that it depends on you whether the love fire will be maintained or whether it will die out. And remember that a child is the result of love. Show love, do not accumulate omissions and resentment. Move on to the next level.
Everything will work out if you consciously go through this difficult but amazing period of pregnancy. And it is best to experience it together with your beloved wife, without standing aside.
Pregnant Dad Syndrome | How to help a pregnant wife
The signs of pregnancy in women are well known to everyone: the stomach grows, strange taste preferences appear, and mood swings occur. Usually during pregnancy, the mother leads a less active lifestyle, sleeps longer and eats more. What is dad doing at this time? As a partner, he often also adjusts to a changed lifestyle. And ... it changes not only inside, but also externally. His general motor activity decreases, nausea occurs in the morning, his tummy grows, drowsiness appears, etc.
Proven is the fact that the hormonal background of the "pregnant dad" is different from the pre-pregnancy state. The amount of testosterone (male hormone) decreases, and the level of estrogen and prolactin (female hormones) increases. Most likely, these changes are secondary, that is, they come after a changed daily routine, the nature of nutrition, and are more common in men who are sensitive, attentive and caring.
Whatever changes happen to your husband, remember that he is also human. He may have his own fears, weaknesses and worries before the upcoming fatherhood. Try to let your husband understand how important he is to you, talk to him about your feelings, consult, confess your love. Spend time together more often, go for walks, go to concerts, exhibitions and visits. Pregnancy is not a disease, but a wonderful state of waiting for a baby. And if two people share it, it's wonderful!
Dealing with pregnancy together
The body of each woman is individual, but some changes are observed in almost all expectant mothers. Many of them may have never been experienced by a woman before pregnancy, so they can be worrisome. Some of the changes are spiritual, some are physical. Some are due to the action of hormones, others are the consequences of an increase in the abdomen and body weight.
Here are the most common inconveniences encountered in mid-pregnancy:
• Edema.
• Problems of the gastrointestinal tract: constipation, accumulation of gases, belching, heartburn.
• Varicose disease of the lower extremities.
• Expansion of the veins of the vagina.
• Spasms of calf muscles.
• Back pain.
• Pain in the womb and duck walking.
All these conditions are temporary, but neither doctors nor modern medicines are able to save the expectant mother from them. And, perhaps, only dad can significantly brighten up the life of mom. How?
There are many ways to please a pregnant woman. Here are the 10 most faithful of them:
1. Accompany the woman to the appointment with the doctor and ultrasound
It is pleasant for the expectant mother to realize that her beloved man is nearby, or at least outside the office door, in which she experiences not the most pleasant sensations. She will be able to share her experiences and the news she heard from the doctor with her dad, when they are still fresh and not blocked by the comments of her friends on the phone.
2. Regularly give small gifts
It is not necessary to give a new iPhone, a car or a ring. Even the most modest gift will be a wonderful sign of attention.
3. Giving flowers
Flowers are especially pleasing when they are given just like that, for no reason. Dad can set a recurring reminder on the phone for a specific day of the week.
4. Talk about your love
There are magic words in the world, and of course they are about love.
5. Cook breakfast
Even if a man does not know how to cook at all, he is able to build breakfast - boil eggs, make toast, brew delicious tea. Does not work? Then you can bring your favorite dessert from the restaurant after a business dinner.
6. Invite to a restaurant
It is sometimes useful to take a break from pregnancy. Oddly enough, many women do not want to go to the cinema during pregnancy - it is dark and noisy there. As an option, you can consider going to the theater, to a concert. Or you can just buy a new movie and watch it at home.
7. Massage
Massage your wife - this is the sacred duty of every future dad. Massage technique is not important, gentle touches are important.
8. Help around the house
During pregnancy, mom does not need to breathe dust or carry bags of groceries. Any woman will appreciate the opportunity to take a break from worries if her husband takes on these responsibilities.
9. Forgive breakdowns and tantrums
Change plans every five minutes and demand the impossible? Oh, how familiar! But sometimes a man just needs to agree with a woman so that she immediately changes her mind and acts sensibly.
10. Compliments
Most women get prettier during pregnancy, but they don't even know it! It is in the power of a man to convince a woman how beautiful she is!
Did any of these points get you hooked? Or did you come up with something of your own? Regular evening walks in the park? Shopping trips together? Discussing plans? Don't wait for a man to guess or read this article. Just ask him to do something that will change your pregnant life for the better.
Preparing for childbirth
A woman prepares for childbirth in special courses. Dad can also attend such courses, especially if he is planning a partner birth. But at the same time, many organizational issues lie on it, which you need to think about in advance, even during pregnancy.
• Organization of transportation to the maternity hospital
This is the duty of the Pope. He may not have a car, but it is desirable for him to organize the transportation of his wife to the hospital. How and what car to go? Which route? How quickly can you get to the hospital? Let there be no surprises in this matter for both of you.
• Collection of things for the maternity hospital
In fact, it is necessary to collect not one, but as many as three bags for the maternity hospital - in the maternity block, in the postpartum department and for discharge! And don't forget the documents! The help of the pope will be especially relevant if you have to go to the hospital when the woman has already begun contractions or the water has broken. She is noticeably nervous in this situation, and the composure of a man can do a good job.
• Arrangement of a children's room
Many parents start renovations while they are expecting a child. This is understandable, because the living space needs to be adapted for a new tenant. Repair dust and noise are not very compatible with an interesting situation, so it would be wiser if dad joins the home improvement.
A partner is also a partner in Africa
If the family decides on a partner birth, then this is one situation, but if the mother goes to the birth alone, this does not mean that the father can relax and do nothing. What business could he have? What should he do?
• Be as free from work as possible on the date of delivery and for a few weeks after it
Childbirth is something that concerns all family members and does not happen so often. Despite the fact that the man is not in the hospital, the very fact that he worries about his family, without being distracted by something else, will give the woman in labor strength.
• Stay in touch
Dad needs to take care of topping up his phone and his wife's phone. Before the expected date of birth, you need to regularly charge them, do not forget to turn on the sound. Alas, we often forget about such simple things. Often women are frustrated just because their phone runs out during childbirth, runs out of money on it, or they can't get through to their husband because he's unavailable!
• Being around
A well-known picture is a sleeping husband in a car near the walls of the maternity hospital. Yes, it's still relevant. Although in many maternity hospitals it is already possible to wait in a cafe, in a hall, in a corridor, etc. In any case, the closer the future dad is to the hospital, the better.
• Be ready to help
Sometimes relatives are required to buy something, go somewhere, help make a decision. After the birth, dad's help will also be needed: to bring things for the woman and the child to the postpartum department, buy something from the dowry, organize an extract.
Born - not free
When the time comes to pick up the child and wife from the hospital, dad should be fully armed.
It is not necessary to decorate the walls of the maternity hospital, it is better to prepare the apartment for the arrival of mother and baby. It should at least be clean. A young mother will also appreciate if a bouquet of flowers, balloons and, possibly, a poster (or at least a piece of paper) with a touching inscription will be waiting for her in the apartment. Dad needs to think about how to organize transportation from the hospital home. If you are accompanied by relatives on discharge, who will then go to visit you, you will need to buy a simple treat. Do not plan long feasts. Baby and mom need rest now.
Going to be discharged, dad should not forget women's, children's things, a camera or a video camera. Be sure to buy flowers for the wife and the medical staff!
At the maternity hospital, upon discharge, a woman should be given an exchange card, a certificate from the registry office for registering the child, a sheet with recommendations and conclusions about the baby’s health, indicating the procedures performed and the vaccinations made. The husband needs to check if the wife has forgotten these documents.
Now dads often organize a solemn discharge - balloons that fly into the sky, a limousine, musical accompaniment, professional photography and video filming. Think about whether you want it and whether it will please you. If you answered yes twice, go ahead.
As you can see, pregnancy and childbirth are a lot of things for mom and dad. How to do everything and not forget anything?! Write lists! A wife should write to her husband what to do! It's easier for men to navigate. Not all of them know how to take the initiative and can immediately understand the situation. To shrug and say: “But mine didn’t think of it before” - this is not about moms, mom is, first of all, a manager. If this science of managing people is not familiar to you yet, then it's time to start mastering it.
Memo for future dads
How to organize help for a mother with a child after childbirth?
1. Define your male childcare responsibilities and stick to them. The more specific they are, the better. You can bathe the child. You can take the child and nurse him, say from 6 to 8 in the morning, giving the wife a chance to sleep. You can walk with the baby, go grocery shopping, buy diapers and baby water, etc.
2. Choose what appeals to you and suits your daily routine, and do it constantly. Such regularity will allow you to cope with the role of the father at first and give mom time to rest and recover faster after childbirth.
3. You can register a child and receive a birth certificate within 30 days after his birth. In order for your mother not to go to the registry office or the MFC, take these chores on yourself.
4. A newborn person also needs certificates! Don't forget about it! Registration, medical insurance, foreign passport - these are just some of them. But it is still necessary to draw up documents for receiving benefits and, if this is not the first child, maternity capital. It all takes time and effort, do not tear the mother away from the child, do it yourself.
Cut-outs:
Nothing brings two people closer than pregnancy, childbirth, and the birth of a child. After all, it is during this period that it is important for mom and dad to be a team and act together.
If a woman wants a man to help and do something specific during pregnancy, childbirth and after them, then you need to talk about it directly, and not wait for him to guess
In recent years, in many schools for childbirth, separate courses for dads have appeared, that is, mom and dad are preparing for childbirth according to different programs.